


East Side Line

by ZombieOutlaw



Category: Pentatonix
Genre: Broadway Kirstie, Busker Avi, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2017-01-17
Packaged: 2018-04-10 09:08:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 32
Words: 75,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4386020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZombieOutlaw/pseuds/ZombieOutlaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kirstie Maldonado is a thriving Broadway actress. Avi Kaplan is a struggling musician living pay check to pay check. Their lives cross paths every night when he busks on her train line but will it ever become more than that?</p><p>A Pentatonix fanfiction. Kavi from the outset. Background Scomiche.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Superman

**Author's Note:**

> I originally posted this story over at Wattpad so don't go all crazy about me copying it - it is my work.

Kirstie Maldonado sighed as she walked out of the stage door after a long night of singing and screaming fans. She hated what her career had become. She missed the days when she still had the integrity of being a Broadway performer and not someone who was screeched at every time she hit a high note at one of her performances. Who on earth goes to a Broadway show and spends the entire time screaming and making a nuisance out of themselves? Kirstie knew she should be grateful to her fans, they had helped her become who she was today but she just wished that some of them learnt the meaning of being quiet in a theatre. A year previously, she would love coming out of the stage door as early as possible to greet her fans and take pictures with them but since she won her Tonys and had a year's worth of sold out shows she had begun to leave as late as she could to avoid the squealing. She had gone from rushing off the stage to quickly get changed and heading out in complete show make up to painstakingly removing every single streak of make up, showering and doing her hair before leaving the theatre. She thought that her actions every night would send a message to her fans that she didn't want all the harassment but their commitment hadn't wavered.

Huffing, she began to stumble towards a nearby subway station that took her to her apartment on the Upper East Side. She was careful to get onto the main street as quickly as possible, she hated that the stage door was practically in an alleyway - anyone could have been lurking in the shadows. Even though she had been a New Yorker for years now and had become street smart from her experience, she was still weary of being alone at night. She set of towards Times Square once she had successfully avoiding any creep that may have been there. She relieved to see all the lights still brightly shining and a swarm of people still there despite the fact it was past midnight. New York at night was the best version of New York, all the tourists were in bed after days full of trips up the Empire State Building, and all of New York's characters were out to play.

Leaving the theatre late did have it's advantages as Kirstie quickly found out. She no longer had to walk ten blocks to get to a less crowded subway station as all the ones round Broadway were tourist traps except at night, she rarely got stopped for photos and he busked on the East Side Line between twelve and one every night. A part of her thought she left so late just so she could hear him sing. There was something about his raspy voice and mellow guitar chords that calmed her down - she had even created a playlist of all the songs she had heard him sing for whenever she wanted to relax, it didn't have the same effect as hearing them live but it still worked. She stood at the station anxiously waiting for the train - and him, phone at the ready to google lyrics so she could identify whatever he would be singing that night.

As the train came into the station, Kirstie felt that familiar excited flutter in her stomach hoping that he was on the carriage. His voice was the perfect medicine for a bad night. However, as with the nature of subway buskers, they frequently hopped on and off trains to get as much money as possible. She desperately needed her nerves to be quelled that night as a fan, clad in a 'I heart Kirstie' shirt and sign, had tried to get on stage while she was in the middle of performing a heartfelt ballad. There was no denying the screaming girl who had to get manhandled out of the room was her fan so she had been thoroughly embarrassed but she continued the show nonetheless, the show must go on after all. She had avoided all eye contact with the rest of the cast and crew all night, she hated when a fan turned the show into a concert and she was sure they did to. Despite all of Scott's comforting words to her about how it didn't distract him and the jealously he felt that she had such passionate fans, she couldn't shake off the feeling that she was becoming a gimmick and loosing respect from the theatre community. She loved her fans, the majority of them were the sweetest and most loving fans ever, but there were a select few who were intrusive and rude and that small group affected her deeply.

She was disappointed when she got onto the carriage when she didn't hear him singing in his serene tone. She guessed she was just unlucky and that he was probably on the next train - it had happened a few times before but she had learnt to time her exit from the stage in correspondence with his routine. He was almost like a drug to her, she found his heartfelt songs intoxicating, his voice was deep and mesmerising - and, he was easy on the eyes.

She sighed for what felt like the millionth time that night and sat down on one of the seats lining the wall of the carriage. She was giving up hope when she heard him.

I can't stand to fly, I'm not that naïve.

She looked around for the source of the voice, wishing to catch a glimpse of him. Even his very demeanour was comforting.

I'm just out to find the better part of me.

She spotted him two carriages down and immediately got up and started moving towards him with a mission to get a better view. She mentally thanked her past self for choosing to wear flats that night as trying to surf down the train in heels was not an easy job.

I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane

It was definitely him. The same beanie, the same hair, the same battered guitar. Just seeing him made her smile.

I'm more than some pretty face beside a train.

She came to a halt just feet from him, there were only a few people by him as the time of day meant that most people got a seat so she had a good view. He was singing with his eyes closed as per usual.

It's not easy to be me.

She opened up her phone and googled the words before making a note of the song and title was. She was shocked when she looked up to find a pair of green eyes looking straight at her. She blushed and looked at her feet when she saw the same familiar grin come across his face. They had done this exchange a thousand times before.

I'm only a man in a funny red sheet, I'm only a man looking for a dream.

She looked up again with the knowledge that they were nearing the next station which he would usually get off at. He was still staring at her. All her worries were out of her head now and all she could think of was him and his music.

I'm only a man in a funny red sheet and it's not easy.

She felt the train slowing down and her heart stared to drop. In that moment she wanted to storm up to the drivers compartment and beg for him to keep going just so he would stay longer.

It's not easy to be me.

She clapped as he finished along with the others in the carriage before pulling out her purse and throwing a twenty into the box that was at his feet. He never asked for money or harassed the passengers as other subway performers did which she found extremely humbling. He smiled at her as she stood back up before walking towards her. She thought he was coming to talk to her but then she remembered that she was standing by the door on the side where the platform as going to be.

Her breath caught in her throat as he came near and she inhaled his familiar musky scent. He smirk down at her when he saw the effect he was having on her and blood rushed to her cheeks.

The train came to a halt and the doors opened. She held her breath ready for his departure but was surprised when he didn't get off straight away. Instead he turned to her and muttered "I sang the Boyce Avenue version" and ran off the train to wait for the next one. He must have known what she did with all of his songs but surprisingly, Kirstie wasn't embarrassed.

She sighed once more that night as he departed, hoping that one day he would stay on for just one more stop.


	2. Blame It On Me

Avi checked the time on his phone to discover that only three minutes had passed until he last checked it. He groaned and threw the phone back into his apron pocket and continued to stir the pot of butternut squash soup he was currently cooking. His shift finished at 11:30. That meant he only had to last another twenty-nine minutes in the torturous environment until he was free. Avi hated preparing food that he knew he couldn't eat but it was the only job he could find that he was somewhat interested in. It was food, Avi loved food. Everyone couldn't be as lucky as Esther was, after just one month of the two of them moving to the Big City, she had landed her dream job as a stage manager at one of the big Broadway theatres. Avi on the other hand, like a thousand other New Yorkers had to grind to make a living - and that included doing a job he hated.

But at least he got to see her most nights. The girl with the most adorable smile and beautiful eyes. The girl who he had made sure that every night he got on the same train that she usually got on just to see her.

He had quickly figured out that she must be something to do with the theatre community of NYC - who else gets the train back at that time of day everyday except on Mondays? However, he had never had too much of a network in that community to have a clue who she was. He had asked Esther more times than he could count about her, every time he noticed something new such as her cute side smile or the scar above her lips. Esther thought he was crazy. So did Avi.

The night before he had spoken to her. As in he finally worked up the courage to say something to her. Avi was shocked at himself for finally doing it. He had seen her almost every night for half a year but for some reason he chose last night as the night he finally said something to her. It wasn't much and it was certainly far from a confession of love, but it was something, a step in the right direction.

Last night she was stressed and upset, he could tell from the frantic look in her eyes and the lack of make up she had on, so he guessed that was why he had chosen that night. She already looked vulnerable so she was less likely to attack him for being a creep on a night time train. He also had a desire to comfort her but since he had never talked to her before all he could manage was to tell her what the version of the song he was singing was. He hoped that this action had the same resonance to her as it had to him, that way he would know that she had liked it and took some comfort from it too.

He turned off the gas when he noticed the soup was cooked and set in on the side for someone to plate it up and serve it. He turned to the order board to see what he had to cook next to find it was empty - it was a Sunday so he wasn't exactly surprised. He took out a stool and sat down next to his station staring at the board in anticipation of the next order still unable to shake the mystery girl off of his mind. He must have only been sitting there a minute before his boss walked over to him and told him he could finish early. It was only fifteen minutes till the end of his shift but Avi was grateful anyway. It meant he had more time to run home and grab his guitar and get back to Manhattan in time to see his mystery girl.

After hanging up his apron and hat in the cloakroom, he had made it onto the subway and into Brooklyn in record time. Since he had to spare that night, he wanted to spend it making himself somewhat presentable for the girl. He dashed into the apartment he shared with his sister (it was more like her apartment as she payed the majority of the rent and he just stayed there) and quickly threw off his uniform and put it in the wash. He walked towards his bedroom in only his boxers when Esther came out of the bathroom brushing her teeth and grumbling something about putting some clothes on.

He pulled on his favourite pair of dark skinny jeans before matching it with a plaid shirt. He ran his hand through his beard in the attempt to make it look a little less ragged and unkept (and to check that there was no food there hiding away). He even sprayed some deodorant on which was a rarity for Avi. Stumbling out of his room towards the bathroom to brush his teeth, he nodded to Esther on his way who followed him into the bathroom and leaned up against the door frame.

"Mystery girl?"

He nodded, toothbrush in his mouth.

"Dressing up I see? You aren't planning on making a move tonight are you?" She smirked.

Avi shrugged. He didn't know himself so he couldn't tell her even if he wanted to.

"Do I smell a freshness about you? Oh Avi, you've got it bad."

Glaring at his sister, he closed the door, locked her out of the bathroom and resumed his brushing.

"Wrap it up Kaplan, I don't want a child living in this apartment." She banged on the door before strolling away. Avi groaned through a mouthful of toothpaste, his sister could be so embarrassing when she wanted to be.

He spit out the paste, careful not to get any in his beard, and looked in the mirror before it dawned on him. What on earth was he going to do with his hair?

It was currently in a bun as his boss had forced him to tie it up but he kinda liked the look, he also liked it with a beanie on as that required no effort whereas Esther preferred it down and on its own. Avi began to wonder how she liked his hair... he had no idea. He decided to go with the only logical answer to his problem, he went with hair down look as Esther liked it and she too was a girl.

He gave one last look in the mirror before charging out of the bathroom, pulling on his converse, grabbing his guitar on the way out heading back into the city.

He made into the city just before midnight so he had some time to kill before heading over to Grand Central and getting on the train to 51st Street - her stop. He found his way over to a nearby outlet mall which was still open - it was New York after all - and made his way over to the cologne section to steal a sample without getting caught. He check his phone - 12:01, he had ten minutes to catch the train.

Grand Central Station, even at midnight, was still a heaving tourist trap. If Avi was not nervous about seeing the mystery girl then he would have almost certainly been grumbling at the people who could not keep up the average walking pace of a New Yorker. He gave off a sigh of relief when he reached the platform for the north bound train, there was nothing touristy to do on the Upper East Side at night so it was noticeably a lot quieter than the rest of the station.

He had started to play this route as he firmly believed that the people who usually got this train had more money - it did go though the UPS after all, but once he discovered that most people who lived there wouldn't dare set foot on the underground network he was going to change to a more cramped line filled with drunks and tourists. But then he met her.

He remembered the first time he saw her, she was absolutely beautiful, she was standing across the train from him looking tired and somewhat depressed but her eyes shone when she had noticed him playing. He would always remember how great it felt to visibly light up someones life with his music, he had never knowingly had that effect on people before and it made him even more enamoured by her. He had left her at the next stop, not wanting to break from routine but had regretted it ever since, that night he should have stayed on, he should have kept playing.

He stepped onto the train hoping to God that he had got on the right one (he had made that mistake a few times before) and began to play his first song of the night. He made sure to be playing a different song every time he saw her which was painstaking at first as it meant he usually had to learn a new song in a day but by that point in their weird train relationship, he was becoming a pro. The whole switching songs thing started in his attempt to get to know her. One day she was standing close enough for him to see she was googling what he was singing at added the name to an already made list. That's when he knew she was writing down all the songs she liked that he sung and he himself made a mental note of all the times she did this. So he switched it up to see who and what she liked and didn't. It wasn't any major information about her but it did give some inkling to him of just who this girl driving him mad was.

He begun to play, pushing his nerves of seeing her to the back of his head as he needed to perform and earn some cash.

The garden was blessed by the Gods of me and you. We headed west for to find ourselves some truth, Oh, What you waiting for? No, what you waiting for?

He had already gotten a little gathering from the people around him probably because it was refreshing to see someone not doing some break dancing on the train, it was the current fashion and every single resident hated it as it took up too much room (the tourists on the other hand...).

He had gotten onto the second chorus of the song when the train started to slow down and his heart began to race once more. He had gotten the right train, she had climbed onto the carriage one door down from him looking as staggeringly amazing as ever and much more content than the night previously.

When I dance alone, and the sun's beating down, blame it on me.

She smiled at him as soon as she heard him playing. It was that brilliant smile that would be the death of him. One glance at it and his throat was closing up and his breathing increased.

When I lose control and the veil's overused, blame it on me.

Unlike the night before, she didn't move closer which disappointed him more than he cared to admit. He yearned for her to be closer to him, to touch him, to speak to him. Avi could only stare at her at a distance. There was no hope of speaking to her that night.

When I dance alone, I know I'll go, blame it on me.

Just when he was making a mental note never to play George Ezra for her again, he saw her pull out her phone and begin to type with that oh so familiar side smirk of hers... Maybe he will play some Ezra for her again.

What you waiting for? No, what you waiting for?

He felt the train brakes come on and he knew she would be out of his view soon. He saw as she looked back up with him with a sad look in her eye, she too knew that he was going to be leaving when the train stopped.

He quickly gathered up his things and said a quick thank you to everyone who had given him money before making eye contact with her once more. He never wanted the connection to end but once the doors opened, he groaned and stepped out onto the platform and away from the girl of his dreams. 

He hoped and prayed that one day she would choose to follow him off the train.


	3. Compass

Kirstie rolled over in her bed in delight when she woke up to remember that it was Monday which meant it was her day off. She loved working at her show, and she loved her cast - especially Scott who was a darling, but eight shows a week really did tire her. She felt emotionally drained every moment which she wasn't high on red bull or coffee and the only thing that seemed to keep her sane was the hope of seeing him when she headed home. Yet it was Monday so her hopes of seeing him that night was non-existent, she hadn't reached the stage yet where she was mental enough to go deeper into the city at night just to see him (though she had thought about it a couple of times on hard days).

Content from her lie-in, she hopped out of bed into her living area to make herself a pot of coffee. Scott was coming over today so she made a list of all the chores she needed to do before he came over a few hours later.

She started by making herself look somewhat presentable pulling on a comfortable sweater and leggings combo before attempting to tame her hair. Since she had cut it shorter, it had become a wild untameable mess every time she woke up which was real fun to deal with. Thank God she wore a wig in the show. She had decided to put off having a shower and doing her make-up until later, there was no point getting clean to only get dirty again later.

She climbed down the stairs of her apartment block to go get her mail, she wasn't fancy enough yet to pay the doorman to bring it up for her nor did she want him to - she liked to feel independent. She groaned when she saw a piece of mail that was obviously from the bank, when she got letter like those it usually meant taking a trip down there which was stressful enough in any city but even more stressful in NYC.

"Hey Girl!" Mitch Grassi's cheerful tone could be recognised anywhere.

"Hey Mitch." She turned around to see Mitch standing there as fashionable as ever. She was surprised that he even talked to her, he was the owner of the penthouse, a magnificent fashion designer and an elite member of the New York circle. All of them factors screamed 'Old Money', no one got that reputation and that rich at such a young age without being helped along by their parents. She was new money, new to to society and new to fame, most of the Upper East Siders ignored her, waiting for her five minutes of fame to be over but not Mitch. Kirstie didn't know if that was because he genuinely liked her or because he wanted to stay current. Most rich people who showed interest in her only did so for an investment, to promote themselves whenever she tweeted about them etc. Regardless of his reasons, Kirstie appreciated that whenever he talked to her, he made her so much more content. He was walking positivity.

"Did I see you coming out of the Subway last night?" He raised his sunglasses as he came to a stop in front of her. She suddenly became self conscious of what she was wearing as not only was she standing next to a fashion designer but a guy who was wearing sunglasses in September. "Girl you are from the UPS now, get a driver."

She shrugged. Mitch never made her uncomfortable despite how sarcastic he could be. He was slowly becoming her only friend in this neighbourhood which she greatly appreciated, she was new to this part of town and Mitch had taught her how to act like she had lived there her entire life. "I like the Subway."

He jokingly glared at her. "No one likes the Subway. It's gross." He crinkled his nose in disgust presumably from recalling a memory of the underground.

Kirstie blushed and became flustered over thinking about the real reason she loved the Subway so much. "It just reminds me of how far I've come, you know." No it didn't. It reminded her of him and his guitar.

Mitch looked at her like she was crazy, unable to wrap his head around why anyone would willingly set foot in what was practically a sewer.

"Anyway..." She started once she realised he was going to continue looking at her like that until she moved on the conversation. "I should get going as I have a friend coming over." 

"Oh is it your boyfriend?" Mitch said a little too enthusiastically. Kirstie had suspected that Mitch had a little crush on Scott, he had somehow managed to think up an excuse to come to her apartment every time he was around. She knew he wasn't serious when he said 'boyfriend', he knew better than anyone that Scott was just a friend but that didn't stop the rest of the fans (and even some friends and family) thinking that he was. Scott and her had decided not to comment on it though, the mystery surrounding them was apparently 'good for business'. 

"Yep, the one and only." She teased. Teasing Mitch was fun as he usually reacted through sassy remarks and comebacks. 

"I may have to pop down to see you then..." He said in a sultry tone and with a smirk. He was well aware that Kirstie knew of his attraction to the tall blond. 

"Ciao." He placed his glasses back over his eyes despite being indoors and sashayed towards the lift with his assistant Mario scurrying after him. 

Great. Now she had to make sure her apartment was extra clean now that the royal highness was coming for a visit.

When she returned to her apartment, she saw her puppy padding around her living room looking for something to do. He didn't take much notice of her when she walked in, he never did when he had just woken up, but once he saw she was heading towards the kitchen area, he quickly followed in suit knowing that he was going to be fed. After she had poured a generous amount of food and water in to his bowls, she poured herself some coffee and sat down at her table contemplating all that needed to be done that day.

Slowly her mind started to drift, as it often did, to thoughts of him. Kirstie didn't understand how one singer who she had never had a conversation with could have such an effect on her. It felt like whenever she saw him she was drawn in. He could make her happy, he could calm her, he could pick her mood up after a long show all through his music. She was surprised that a record label hadn't snatched him up already - or maybe they had and he could be busking just for pleasure. He had talent and from the power in his voice she was certain he had been classically trained but being part of the theatre community Kirstie knew all to well that talent doesn't necessarily mean success. Life was cruel that way.

She wondered what he did for a living, whether or not he was interested in women, if he had a partner or if he was single. She would love for him to be single. Any thought of him being effected by someone the same way he affected her made her illogically jealous. This guy could send her mind spiralling in the time it took to get from one stop to the next, she desperately needed to know him better.

She made her way over to her laptop to open up the only way she did know him - his choice of music. Setting her playlist on shuffle, she walked over to her laundry pile and began to sort it out. She smiled when she heard what the first song was, it was the first song he had ever heard him play.

It was early in February and she was having a rough day. The snowfall had meant that New York had collectively slowed down, at that included the trains. She was already late for a tech rehearsal thanks to demon subway system but she had chosen to stop for pictures with some fans which had made her uber late. Her director had shouted at her for being unprofessional and childish (which made her cry) and she had continued to criticise her throughout the rest of the rehearsal. Kirstie was already insecure to begin with so the added pressure to impress her director had turned her evening show into shambles. It was the worst performance of her entire career and she was surprised that she wasn't fired on the spot. She found out later that Scott had come to the rescue by making up an excuse for why she had been off which somehow was so convincing that the director had come over an apologised to her. However, that whole ordeal had made her late and she hated catching the trains after 11. 

In retrospect, she was glad that she had messed up that night as if not, she doubted she would feel the same connection she felt to her guitar playing hero on the train. If it wasn't for her having a shit day and him soothing her with his deep voice, she probably would have never thought anything of him apart from commenting that he was a good singer. 

She found out later that it was a song called 'Compass' when she was humming backstage and Esther, the stage manager, asked if she was a fan. When she said she didn't know what it was, Esther had started to witter on about how it was one of her favourite songs which she sang it all the time and forced everyone she knew to listen to it. Esther would have gone on and on if it was for the overture being played by the band indicating it was nearly time to go on.

She let out a loud groan when she snapped back into reality and found her pile of laundry still there in front of her unsorted. Maybe playing the playlist while she needed to be productive was a bad idea. She switched it over to a more upbeat one which would hopefully be less distracting to her than thoughts of him.


	4. Upwards over the Mountain

Mitch and Scott, as Kirstie had predicted, had spent the entire time the two were at her apartment flirting and just generally being all over each other. Mitch had entertained them by successfully making them all cocktails from the limited stash of spirits Kirstie had in her apartment while throwing out as many innuendos as he could. He had Scott bawling with laughter with each phallic reference he made which had greatly pleased Mitch. There was nothing better than a good, responsive (and cute) audience. Kirstie, on the other hand, had giggled along with the jokes but wasn't as vocal of her amusement. She was just happy to see her only two close friends in the city enjoying each other's company. The city could be lonely at times but it was moments like these that reminded her that her move here was not a mistake.

The flirty couple were currently talking about the past fashion week which Mitch had a major show at. When she had first moved to the city a few years ago straight out of high school, Mitch was practically a nobody. She had never heard about him until a couple of years later when he had blown up over night. Scott, who was a lot more involved in fashion than her, had also never heard of Mitch until his self proclaimed queen, Beyoncé, tweeted about a shirt Mitch had designed. Every since then, he had been obsessed and dying to meet him, when he found out she had moved into his apartment building, he had begged her for an introduction. Kirstie was certain that he had bought everything he could afford from his collection but she was sure that if he ever wanted more, Mitch would happily give him some for free just for being cute.

Kirstie just sat there listening to the two talk, cocktail in hand. She didn't really have any comments to add about the subject, when it came to fashion she was never a label obsessor, she bought what looked good on her regardless of who made it. Mitch was retelling an amusing story of how he embarrassed himself in front of Alexia Chung at an after party and the two were in tears of laughter, gripping on to each other for mutual support. Kirstie knew that she had to help the two along the way to getting together, they were too cute together for her to resist interfering. She wanted nothing more than her friends' happiness and they sure as hell looked happy together.

The oversized clock on her wall told her that it was just past 11. All the third wheeling she had done that evening had forced her to think of him (as she did quite often) and how desperately she wanted to see him. If she decided to leave just then, she would probably catch him - that is if he actually played on a Monday, she wouldn't know. If she left to go see him, it would be a perfect way to leave Scott and Mitch alone for an hour. If she left to see him, she knew that would change the whole dynamic of what was going on between them. Before then it had been a matter of convenience, she needed to get home, he needed money. But if she purposely went to see him, that changed everything. It would mean whatever the crazy thing that they had would become a voluntary thing, she would be purposely seeking him out. This was new territory for them and Kirstie hoped to God that he would like it. 

"I'm going to run to the store to get some popcorn and stuff for our movie later, do you want anything?" She stood up from her position on her couch and got ready to leave her apartment.

"Erm, no Kirst I think I'm good. What about you Katherine?" Scott slurred due to the alcohol in his system, he had probably had two times as much as Kirstie but no where near as much as Mitch who was in that moment posing for a selfie.

"Mamma is good." He repositioned himself to get Scott in on the selfie action. "Be careful on that disgusting train of yours. Don't let anybody who is wearing crocs pick you up." She smirked to herself, Kirstie knew exactly who she would want to be picked up by and he certainly didn't wear crocs.

"Only if you be careful with my boyfriend!" She joked as she walked out of her apartment and heard Mitch mumble something incoherent back to her which made Scott erupt with laughter. 

She figured that her guy started in Grand Central, it was the most obvious place to start. It was the hub of the trains, easy access and filled with tourists, it was logically the perfect place to start the night busking. Kirstie also realised that going to Grand Central would be convenient for her to get the snacks, there was plenty of 24 hour stores in the centre of the city. It was the perfect plan, she just hoped he showed his face.

Hoping of the train, she skilfully manoeuvred through the heaving station to find a convenience store. After she had purchased the popcorn and other various snacks (she had even picked up some pills to give Mitch tomorrow morning) she made her way back to the station keeping an eye out for him. It was nearly 12 so Kirstie presumed he would be there but from what she could see, he wasn't. It only then dawned on Kirstie that he may not stick to the same time schedule on a Monday, she never got the train in the evenings so maybe she had already missed him. She waited at the northbound platform way longer than it was deemed sane to do so. She watched as trains came and went but she never got on one, she needed to see him. Something about him had made her seriously need to be with him that night which confused Kirstie greatly. The night had been great, she had been having fun in the company of good friends but she there was something incomplete about the night which she was sure was down to the lack of him. That never happened on a Monday; Something had changed.

She waited until 12:30. Mitch and Scott were probably too drunk to notice her prolonged absence which was probably good thing, it meant she probably wouldn't be questioned when she got back and they would have an extra long time alone together. She prayed that when she returned she wouldn't find them in a compromising position because it certainly looked like it was going there when she was with them. She was not drunk enough to be able to etch that memory from her brain and she had just cleaned that day, she didn't want to sanitise everything again. 

When it came to 12:40 she reluctantly had decided to give up and get on the next train back, he obviously wasn't coming. She groaned as she stepped onto the train at the overwhelming stench of alcohol one women gave off, it was almost as if she had been bathing in it it was that strong. Bringing her free hand up to her mouth, she leaned against the door opposite to the one she came on through and closed her eyes, waiting for the ride to be over. She had forgotten how bad the subway was a night with out him to quell her worries. There were eyes on her, she knew it and one guy in a badly fitting business suit was a little too close for comfort. When the train finally set off, she began counting the minutes to her stop.

Then she heard him. 

Mother don't worry, I killed the last snake that lived in the creek bed.

Her eyes snapped open, she knew who it was straight away and she could detect that he was only feet away from her but she couldn't see anything thanks to the ogre in a business suit that was hovering in front of her. Kirstie could tell there was something different about him that night, he wasn't exactly performing the song more like enjoying it for himself. He was singing for his own pleasure and not for the pleasure of those around him. 

Mother don't worry, I've got some money I saved for the weekend.

No longer concerned about projecting his voice, Kirstie had to strain herself to hear him as she certainly was not going to make contact with the guy in front of him to ask him to move, she didn't want to give him an excuse to talk to her. 

Mother remember being so stern with that girl who was with me.

There was something very personal about his performance that made Kirstie question why she had never heard him sing like this before. He was living for the music just like she did whenever she sang Gravity by Sara Bareilles. She loved that song, maybe he loved this one too?

Mother remember the blink of an eye when I breathed through your body.

Kirstie, desperate to see him, had manoeuvred herself to get a view of him between the man and a large silver pole. He had his eyes closed again, he always did when he didn't think she was there. He was performing the song as little as he could get away with, he was a busker after all, his music had to have a little oomph in it by its very nature or he wouldn't get money.

So may the sunrise bring hope where it once was forgotten.

She could feel the train driver hitting the breaks and she made an effort to not go crashing into the man in front of her. If the man didn't get off at the next stop - her usual one for work - she dreaded to think how close he would get to her. She didn't wish to be any closer to his leering eyes.

Sons are like birds flying upwards over the mountain.

Kirstie was over the moon when the man in front of her made a move to get by her - he was getting off the train. It meant that she could actually breathe without being worried about touching him...and it also gave her a better view of him. Despite all the commotion that happens when a train opens its doors at a subway station, the guy had managed to keep his eyes closed. Kirstie figured that he must have felt pretty secure where he was, he had no need to fight over train space, he was a guy playing the guitar after all, people naturally gave him the space. 

Mother I made it up from the bruise on the floor of this prison.

Kirstie took up a prime position in front of him as the train set off once more, not many people had got on so she actually had room to relax a little. She wanted to be right in front of him so that the moment he opened his eyes, he would see her. Hopefully seeing her there, in front of him on a Monday, would cause him to stay on the vehicle.

Mother I lost it all of the fear of the Lord I was given.

She couldn't hold back her staring. There was just something so enamouring about this moment and this guy to Kirstie. There was a quiet passion in his voice that she wanted to discover deeper. Not to mention the fact that he was nice to look at - especially when performing, his voice just added to the all round attractiveness of him.

He got to the end of the verse he was singing when the train once more began to slow doing. Kirstie couldn't remember the stops being so close together, she swore they were usually much further apart. Her heart began to race in her chest at thought of him leaving. She wanted to stop time right there and then to prevent him from ever leaving her. She wanted to barricade the door so he couldn't leave. She wanted to ask him not to go.

He bent down to collect his stuff before he stood back up to get ready to leave. As he came back up, his eyes met hers and he had to double take to see if he was dreaming. The humble smile that came over his face made Kirstie breath catch and become unsteady. The genuine look of happiness he had over seeing her had sent her heart and mind into overdrive, she had never felt this way before. The train came to a stop at the station and she looked at him expectingly, pleading with him not to go. Unbeknown to her, his mind was already made up.

He didn't get off the train.


	5. First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

"Hi..." He somehow managed to stammer out, bewildered by the woman in front of him. They were in foreign territory now, he didn't know how to act. For some reason the sight of her had managed to startled him into breaking his routine so Avi had no idea what he was going to do next. He could already feel the redness appearing on his cheeks which only made him more anxious. Not only was he probably coming across as an blundering idiot, he was now an obviously flustered blundering idiot.

"Hi." Her reply was almost staccato, matching his awkwardness completely.

He carefully moved over to her, never taking her eyes off hers, trying not to land flat on the floor in front of her. He knew he yearned to be closer to her but he had surprised himself at such a bold move. He came to a stop in front of her and grabbed the bar hanging from the roof for support - God knows he needed it.

Avi couldn't believe what was happening, a day ago they were still on the page where all they did was stare at each other across the carriage but her change in schedule and unexpected forwardness had completely obliterated that. Six months ago he had sang a Johnny Cash song about her the day after seeing her for the first time and now he was talking to her. A pleased smile came across his face as he felt her brush up against him thanks to the motion of the train. She didn't flinch, neither did he. A silence had fallen upon them creating a thick air of anticipation between them. They just stood there staring, taking each other in and experiencing the change in dynamics.

"Erm." He heard her mumble before breaking the eye contact to look down at their feet. Avi was relieved when he remembered he was wearing shoes that were only slightly shabby.

"Yeah." He huffed into the air and glanced over at the subway map above the door pretending to study it when in fact he knew most of it like the back of his hand. He hadn't a clue what to do or say - what should you tell a women you've been staring at for months?

"What's in the bag?" He gulped out and immediately regretted it. Smooth Avi, real smooth. It wasn't the most romantic of starts but it was an opener nonetheless.

"Erm," It was her turn to become flustered under his gaze. "Just some snacks. I'm having a movie night with some friends."

"I didn't think you Upper Easters bought your own snacks, don't you have a butler or something to do that for you?" Avi attempted to tease her but his nerves made his words sound more like someone having a panic attack than a comedian.

"What makes you think I live there?" She said with a smirk, clearly she was feeling much more comfortable than Avi. Wherever she was getting her confidence from, Avi wanted some too.

Her eyes staring him down and that smirk made him hot under the collar. "Erm, you don't? I thought you did since you know you are on this train, well you could live in The Bronx but I don't know - I mean, not that I was stalking you, like that would be creepy."

She looked at him with a bemused expression on her face and gave off a chuckle. "I was just teasing you, I live in Manhattan."

The train once more pulled up to a station and she moved closer to him to let others get on. For a second she was practically flat out against his chest and Avi swore his heart stopped beating momentarily. "Um Brooklyn."

"What was that?" Soprano? Avi noted as she peered up at him, a little too close for comfort but he didn't dislike it. "You said something". Definitely Mezzo-soprano.

"Brooklyn, I'm from Brooklyn." He swallowed, she was way too close to think straight, her aura was mesmerising.

"Ah. Thought so." She beamed up at him proudly.

Avi was dumbfounded. It was the first confirmation that she had been thinking about him often. "Really?"

"Yep. You look like a lumberjack, everyone from Brooklyn either looks like a lumberjack or a walking art project or a mime artist. Well from my experience anyway."

Avi looked down at his checkered shirt and grinned. He realised that he was in fact taking style inspiration from them, the girl was right.

"Oh I'm Kirstie by the way." There was no attempt at a handshake or any action of greeting, just eye contact.

"Avi."

He closed his eyes for a second to savour the moment. He had finally found out his mystery girl's name. The face he had been thinking about, the face that was practically haunting him had now got a name. He could've ended the conversation there and be satisfied by how far they had come that night. Just days previously he had been singing love songs on trains about her and now they were talking. It felt like a dream.

"You look nervous, Avi." His mind went into overload at the sound of her saying his name, it turned him on, shocked him and made him fearful all at once. "Do you want to come back to mine for a drink? It's the next stop"

Avi had no clue about what she meant by that. Was she asking him back to hers to sleep with him? Did she want to talk? Was this a date? He had spent so long attempting to get to know her as much he could but now that he was having a conversation with her, he realised he hardly knew her at all.

"What are you suggesting?" He tried to sound as sexy as he could just in case that was what she was after but his nerves didn't allow his voice to have the desired tone.

"Oh." She looked startled which Avi denoted was due to her realising the suggestiveness of her comment. She recovered quickly though and lowered her voice to tease him. "Well I never have sex on the first date."

He watched as she stumbled out of the train car onto the platform, giggling at her own words, and quickly followed in suit - he hadn't even realised they had stopped. "Wait, are you asking me on a date?"

"Only if you want me to."

Avi didn't know how she was so confident, he was a messed compared to her. He was sure she was flirting with him and all he could answer with was rushed words. "Sure."

"Come on." She began walking away from him and up the stairs onto the street giving Avi a nice view of her behind. He followed behind her quietly, careful not to knock into anyone with the guitar he had now swung onto his back. He knew it was a cliche but he felt like he could feel the glares of the rich people around him as he walked with her to her apartment. He didn't belong here but he was going to brave it for her. For Kirstie.

She looked as if her confidence had began to waver since the station. Her shoulders had dropped and her paced slowed down. He couldn't see her face that well from the limited lights of the street lights but he was sure that doubt was beginning to creep into her mind. As she typed in the code into a keypad to let her into the door of an impressing looking building, Avi prepared himself for the rejection he was sure was going to come his way. It never came though. Instead she had strolled through the door and held it open for him with a nervous smile.

The way up to her room was awkward, even more awkward than the train ride there. They didn't talk all the way there so Avi had a good chance to check out the building's interior. It was fancy, way fancy than anyplace he could afford. He had figured she had money but seeing his theories come to life was weird.

She stopped and leaned against a door which Avi presumed was her apartment. "Just to warn you, my friends can be a little...overwhelming."

"Got it." He nodded. Avi didn't know whether the thought of meeting her friends made him more or less anxious. On one hand he would have to explain himself to two complete strangers but on the other it meant that things between the two of them would be less awkward by the added company.

When she opened the door and let him into her apartment, he was shocked. Immediately his eyes were drawn to the clearly very drunk guy practically passed out on the couch, slumped against the arm and mumbling sweet nothings. To make matters even more suspicious, he was doing it in front of a tripod with a very expensive looking camera on top of it.

"Oh my God!" The sight had caused Kirstie to stop dead in her tracks.

"KIRSTIE!" The blonde squeal as he attempted to stand up but failed and fell back to where he was sitting. He immediately roared with laughter and much to Avi's surprise, another guy popped his head up over the back of the couch to talk to her.

"Avec man with beard? You go girl! Momma gonna get laid!" Avi could feel the man's eyes on him and he was almost certain he was checking him out.

"Mitch, what is this?" He thought she sounded more annoyed than angry but then again, he didn't know her.

"You're looking at the next two YouTube stars! Now please go before you start making babies in front of us." He reached out for the bag of snacks and Kirstie gave it to him bewildered at the situation. She made a beeline for what was presumably the kitchen which left Avi standing there in the room with a guy staring him down and other sounding like he was getting murdered.

"I like your beard, Big Daddy." He had been hit on by guys before so he wasn't uncomfortable by it but he was uncomfortable by the fact he was standing in the living room of the girl-he-had-been-fantasising-about's apartment being hit on by one of her incredibly drunk friends.

"That's nice." He mentally sent out a panic signal to Kirstie to get her to return to the room.

"You know what they say about men with beards, they have aw-"

"MITCH." The slurring man was quickly stopped an embarrassed Kirstie returning with a bottle of wine in hand.

"Stay safe, Tony and Maria." Just as quickly as he had appeared he had disappeared behind the back of the couch giggling along with the howling blonde.

"Oh I'm so sorry." She let out a giggle as she walked over to him which he could completely adorable.

"'s fine."

"I only had red as them monsters took the rest. It's Pinot so I hope you like it." She gestured to the bottle in her hand. Avi had less experience with wine than any other alcohol so he really didn't have a clue what 'Pinot' was, all he knew was that he was feeling awkward as heck and he needed so to take the edge of things if he wanted to make it through the night.

"I'm sure I will." He was surprised by the fact that his voice now had the strength and the confidence he was used to. Perhaps talking to the two hot messes on the couch was a godsend.

"Follow me." She smirk up at him before turning towards her door.

Beginning to follow her, he curiously asked where she was taking him.

"You'll see!"


	6. Falling Slowly

"I bet you have a better view in Brooklyn." She smirked as she handed him a generous amount of wine in a plastic cup which he gratefully accepted. He needed something, anything really, to ease his nerves.

He was out of his element, a Brooklyn fish out of water hanging on a rooftop of a fancy Upper East Side apartment block. If someone would have offered him a book on how to make it through that situation without making a fool out of himself, he would have happily taken it, even if he had to give something ridiculous like $100 in exchange. Avi desperately wanted the night to go well. This was his one chance with the girl of his dreams, one chance to woo her, to get to know her. There was too much riding on this situation for him to blow it, he needed to get this right.

The wine was bitter, Avi figured from the distaste in his mouth that he was more of a white wine person but he drank it anyway needing something to quell his nerves.

"I don't know, I do quite like looking at the walls of other buildings." He joked, Avi was unsure whether the wine was working already after one sip or if being in the mere presence of the alcohol had given him a confidence boost - either way he didn't care, it meant that he was no longer mumbling.

It was true, he did have a better view from his apartment in Brooklyn. This view wasn't anything spectacular, just a nice viewing point of the buildings around it, perfect for being nosey. The trouble with living on the island was you couldn't behold the magic of the Manhattan skyline since you were in it and unless you were in the Chrysler or the Empire State or just happened to live next to the Hudson, your view would be at best some nice architecture on the building next to yours. It was one of the perks of living in another borough and one of the reasons him and Esther had opted not to live in the hub of the city.

"Where abouts in Brooklyn do you live? I used to be a Queens girl myself so if it's not Williamsburg, I'll just pretend to know where you are on about." She took a sip of her own wine before walking past Avi to the edge of the building and looked down on the people below. He didn't know how something so simple as curiously observing people could look so beautiful but somehow she made it so.

"Um, Carroll Gardens? It's south of the bridge." He began to play with his beard in order to give his free hand something to do as he walked over to join her.

She crinkled her nose trying to work out where he was talking about with Avi found adorable. "Er, I think I know - a friend of mine lives there. Is it as hipster as the rest of Brooklyn?"

This made Avi chuckle, he found borough stereotypes hilarious, everyone used them whether they believed them or not but unlike most stereotypes, they were usually true. "Not exactly, it's more of a family friendly area. There's still some killer coffee shops and art galleries though."

She let out a noise of recognition before shivering. It was way more windy up there than either of them were expecting.

"You cold?" Avi instinctively moved closer to her to share his warmth with her.

She had her arms wrapped around her chest and was as curled up as someone standing up could be. "Obviously."

Avi knew his cue, he had watched enough romance films to know how this went down. "Would you like my jacket?" He gestured to the leather coat he was wearing over the top of a hoodie. If he had known he would have been seeing her that night, he would have worn his fancy coat.

"Erm please? Just for a second. I'll go run down to my apartment to get a blanket or something. Do you want me to take your guitar down?" She gestured to his guitar which he had reseted next to the door to the stairwell.

Careful not to spill any wine, he removed his jacket and handed it to her in exchange for her cup. "No that's fine, I don't really trust your friends not to play it." He aimed for it to sound light hearted and not serious since he didn't want to offend her but it was true, no way in hell was he going to let his guitar anywhere near those two sassy drunk guys, they appeared out of control.

The jacket looked good, it was oversized on her which highlighted just how tiny she was but that just made her even more attractive to him. There was something so sensual about a person you like wearing your clothing, even something as simple as wearing a coat becomes intimate.

"Black's your colour." He smirked. The wine had definitely comforted his anxiousness.

"Er- thanks. I'll be back soon, don't leave." She stepped away from him and he fought back his body instinctively wanting to pull her back into his vicinity. He watched as she walked away from him hoping that he had not scared her off and she was going to come back.

He took a moment to take everything that had happened that night in. Just hours ago he was cursing his sorry excuse for a life and now he was standing on top of a building in the UPS with two plastic cups filled with wine he didn't like waiting for an extremely attractive girl. How the tides had changed. He couldn't believe his luck when he saw her there across from him on the train, for a while he had started to think what was between them was all in his head but seeing her and her asking him back to her apartment had confirmed that it wasn't. He couldn't wait to tell Esther all about it. At least this would make her think maybe he wasn't going crazy.

The sound of the door opening again alerted him to her presence, she came out with two blankets in her hand one looking more durable and the other fluffy and soft. The grin on her face and the slight rosiness in her cheeks made her look breathtaking, he hadn't been with a girl who made him had that reaction since high school and it felt foreign. He admired her as she laid out a checkered blanket on the roof's floor and invited him to go sit on it. Kirstie took his jacket off before sitting down which he found more sexual than it should be.

"How are your friends?"

She happily took back her wine from him as he threw on his jacket and took a big swig before replying. "Very drunk. Mitch asked after you...I think you've caught his eye."

"Is he the small one?"

"Yep." She wrapped the blanket that looked like the texan flag around her making herself cosy. Even with his jacket on, he was beginning to feel the chill of a New York September night and yearned to be under the blanket's warmth with her.

"Should I be worried?" He settled for moving closer to her and mirrored her position by crossing his legs.

"Nah, I'm pretty sure he's head over heels in love with Scott - he's the blonde - so you don't have to be scared. I hope he didn't make it uncomfortable, I know most guys don't like being hit on by other guys - wait, you are straight right?"

He huffed, "Completely."

"No girlfriend?" She raised her eyebrow at him and bit her lip which totally enamoured him.

"I'm living the single life." It was true, he had been dating people casually but his last real relationship was in college. "Are you?"

"Single - but don't tell my fans, they think I'm dating Scott." She giggled, glancing at him, cautious at how he would react.

"So you are on Broadway after all, I was right." Avi mentally scolded himself after he let that slip, he knew as soon as he said it that it would come across as stalker-ish and creepy.

She seemed shocked. "How did you guess?"

"Erm - You just have that star quality about you?" Well that wasn't cheesy at all, well done Avi.

She looked at him like she was staring into his soul and he knew in that instant that she had seen threw his lie. "That's impressive, I've never managed to figure out what you did for a day job."

Apparently, they were on the same level when it came to creepiness. To Avi, this girl was getting more and more perfect by each minute he spent with her. "I'm a chef at an outback restaurant in Chelsea, I basically spend every day making soup and Bbq sauce. It's not the best paying job but its something."

Surrounded by the grandeur of that part of town, he felt very uncomfortable telling her about his crappy job knowing that her pay check was probably ten times more than his.

"I was a server at Applebee's until a year ago so don't beat yourself up about it. I'm sure you'll get your big break at some point. You are pursuing music right?" She shifted her body trying to get comfortable and ended up much closer to him which Avi was certain she had done on purpose.

"I don't know to be honest." He really didn't, his life was a mess.

"But you are so good. You won me over and I only listen to show tunes!" She knocked his shoulder with hers sending a shiver throughout his body.

"Actually, folk songs aren't actually my forte, I majored in Opera. I thought I was going to get a big career but instead all I got was student debt." He sighed at the thought of the younger and more naive version of himself back in college. He yearned to be as optimistic as he was back then, living felt easier and he actually looked forward to the future.

"I knew you were classically trained." She muttered slightly.

"Whose the stalker now?" He teased her, relieved that she had chosen to lighten the mood.

She glared at him, feigning being angry at him but the slight curving of her lips and the light in her eyes gave her away.

"I'm so glad you came to see me today." He had probably already finished a glass of wine due to him sipping it like beer thanks to his lack of experience so his confidence was already sky high.

"You're lucky Mitch had given me one of his infamous cocktails before I'd left, if I hadn't had been high on sugar and slightly buzzed, we'd probably still be on the train staring at each other." She leaned into him slightly, resting her body lightly against his but even with the gentlest of actions, it still made his body tense.

"Oh really? I was wondering why you were so forward." He moved his hand to rest on the floor behind her to give her more room to get closer to him, which she did.

"It's crazy. This is crazy. Just think about how many things had to happen for us to get here, so many things had to fall in line for us to meet and now to be here. It's mental." Avi took it that wine made Kirstie poetic and sentimental which made him even more ardent about her.

He didn't reply so she filled in the silence. "You never finished your song, could you finish it now? It's only fitting that you sing to me considering that's all we have been doing together for the pass few months. You sing, I listen that is."

She was like a small child looking up at him with big hopeful eyes. "You're very demanding" He joked, already getting up to go pick up his guitar. "Are you sure, it will definitely piss off your neighbours?"

Kirstie was practically bouncing in her seat, "Screw them, they are are mostly rich and pompous and never give me the time of day."

"Okay... What do you want me to play? Any requests - I know you know them all." He took his place opposite her on the ground and brought the guitar onto his lap.

She looked at him guilty when she knew she had been caught out. "You got me, I make a playlist." She held up her hands in a surrendering gesture. "I'm not bothered, play whatever you are feeling."

"Erm..." He wracked his brain trying to think of the perfect song, he needed it to be great and fitting, his regular, slightly pessimistic Iron & Wine was not going to cut it this time.

"Since you are a Broadway star and I'm a busker, I thought this was an adequate choice." He smiled as he began to play the opening melody knowing that she probably knew the song off by heart. He had learnt it so he could play backup for his friend at an open mic night and he couldn't help but thank his past self for agreeing to it because know he was playing it to her and it was perfect. "I've never seen the show, just the movie so don't kill me if its not up to the Broadway standards."

I don't know you but I want you all the more for that.

He admired her as her eyes lit up and she began to play with her blonde locks, she had leaned forward and rested her head on her hand watching him, staring at him. He felt so nervous singing in front of her in that moment - he had sang to her a million times before but never as intimate as this was.

Words fall through me and always fool me and I can't react.

The way she looked at him made him feel incredibly warm inside. It felt like she understood him and knew him, like they had been together forever but it also made him feel her excitement and the anticipation of what was to come from this. Everything was new, everything felt magical.

And games that never amount to more than they're meant.

She began to sing along quietly, harmonising perfectly, giving Avi hints of the vast amount of talent she had. He swore that in that moment, sitting there on the roof of her apartment building, slightly tipsy from awful wine and singing a modern classic, he was utterly and undisputedly in love with her.

Will play themselves out.

He didn't make it to the chorus before her lips was on his finally making happen what they had both yearned for for months.

It was slightly clumsy from the alcohol and the guitar keeping the two apart but it was wonderful. It was as if everything had culminated in that moment. Everything in his life had been leading up to that moment and for once in his life, he didn't care about what the future may bring. He wanted to live in that moment forever, savouring the way her lips tasted like wine against his, the feeling of her hands against his cheeks, how she increased the pressure of the kiss once she felt him kissing back. He pulled the guitar out from between them, careful not to knock over the forgotten wine, and pulled the girl clad in a blanket into his lap to deepen the kiss which she enthusiastically responded to.

He was so glad he stayed on that train.


	7. Stay Alive

The brash sound of a car horn rudely awoke Kirstie from her slumber and she instinctively reached out to where she expected him to be. She needed to know if he was still there with her, that the magical night had been real so you could imagine her panic when her arms met nothing but blankets.

Had it all been a weird and realistic dream? She doubted it, why else would she be laying on the roof of her apartment building. Had he left her? She hoped not, she didn't want to know that he was the type of person to leave a girl on a rooftop all night. Her worries were stopped in their tracks when she saw him leading over the side of the building watching life below. He had stayed, just like had done on the train.

She gathered the blankets around her and walked over to the silent figure, there must have been something interesting happening below because he hadn't reacted to the sound of her moving around.

Wrapping her arms around his midsection, she rested her forehead on his back as she felt him tense up at the sudden unexpected contact. He quickly eased up when he realised who it was and wrapped his arms around hers. When she felt how cold his hands were, she automatically tightened her grip on him attempting to warm him up - she had the advantages of having a blanket and was more than willing to share.

"Everything the light touches is our kingdom." She put on her best wise man voice as she joked about the amount of concentration he had when observing the people below. She had thought at first that she had overstepped the mark and he had found her Disney quote rude and intended to offend him but then she felt his laugh vibrate throughout his body. Damn his voice was deep.

"What about that shadowy place over there?" She heard (well more like felt) him mumble.

Quickly, she searched her brain for the most suitable answer, she wanted humour but she also wanted to avoid being offensive. "That's the Bronx, you must promise me never to go there."

This time she heard him audibly chuckle as he moved her around to his side and pulled her close. "Morning." He placed a kiss on her forehead before continuing his watch on the street below.

"What time is it?" It was still dark out so Kirstie figured it wasn't quite morning but the sky was lighter from the last time she looked at it.

"About 5-ish? I don't really know, I left my phone at my apartment."

She pulled out her iPhone to find it was in fact 5:07. "You are psychic. It's nearly ten past 5."

"Nailed it." He finally pulled his eyes away from his people watching to wrap his arms around her and beam down at her.

"Did you sleep at all?" She reaches up to play with his hair, thankful that somehow in the process of kissing him earlier that night she had managed to pull it down. She liked him like that, her very own mountain man.

"Not a wink, I'm a night owl." His arms moved to hold her under her blanket and he dragged her closer to him. "And anyway, I already have ideas of what songs I'm going to sing to you next."

"Yeah?"

"You ever heard of José González?" He raised his eyebrows at him expectingly.

"Not yet, but something tells me I will do soon." She beamed up at him, she would never get tired of looking at him.

Being so close to him in his arms, she yearned to kiss him but stopped herself as she was unsure at whether they were at the stage or not. They had spent much of there time together before she had fallen asleep kissing and it was amazing but the wine had worn off slightly and she wasn't aware about how she should be acting now they were back to reality. He must had felt what she wanted to do as she was broken from her thoughts by his lips on hers. His beard tickled her chin as she responded, alternating the pressure. She could get used to that.

"We should go inside, you're freezing." She rubbed his arms to generate warmth and gave him a quick kiss one last time before walking away to start folding up the blankets.

"Do you want to go to breakfast instead? I'm kinda hungry." He trailed off and sheepishly rubbed his beard while he began to gather up the remains of their alcoholic adventures.

"I could do breakfast. I'll just have to check that the terrible twosome didn't accidentally kill my dog overnight." She straightened up and waited for him to pick up his guitar. "Do you know any place good?"

Skilfully managing to juggle a wine bottle, some plastic cups and his guitar, he held open the door for her to go through. "I know a good place but it's over in Brooklyn. Do you fancy taking a trip down to my neck of the woods?"

"Sure but lets get you warmed up first, I don't want you getting hypothermia on our first date." She smirked at him before leading him down to her apartment. That was them now, she had figured out what they had become overnight, they were a ball of flirting and sexual tension, not yet a couple but not exactly not a couple.

"I've had worse dates." The smile which Kirstie knew was plastered on his face could be heard through his tone. 

"Oh really?" She looked back at him, half expecting what was going to come next.

"Yeah, you weren't there." That made her blush. She knew he was joking but she couldn't help but wish that there was some truth behind it. 

"I really hope they haven't destroyed my apartment, I just cleaned up earlier." She changed the subject, she needed to help herself from thinking about all the other girls he'd been with.

"I don't think so, they looked too intoxicated to get up to much trouble." He reached and took the blankets off of her as she unlocked her door hoping that what she found behind it would be pleasant.

"Oh you don't know Scott and Mitch, they are the most mental drunks you'll ever see." Peering around the door, she gave a sigh of relief when she saw her apartment was more or less still in the condition she left it in.

The two drunks were passed out on the couch sleeping soundly and practically folded on top of each other. Scott was snoring obnoxiously loud which gave away just how much he had had to drink whereas Mitch was muttering in his sleep about someone he didn't like. Kirstie recorded the two for blackmail while gesturing to Avi in the direction of the Kitchen to drop off the wine. The camera and it's tripod was still out, she still wasn't too sure what they were doing with it but she didn't want it in the way if one of them decided to get up and drunkenly stumble around the room. She got the camera off easily enough but she couldn't figure out the tripod so she just moved it to the side of the room.

Her little puppy was sleepily raising his head from his bed in the corner of the room at the noise she was making and looked happy to see her back. He was probably really pissed that he had been left with the two but a dog's love is unconditional, she could not feed him all day and he still would love her. She gave him a scratch behind the ear and muttered an apology to him as he laid his head back down. He was exhausted, probably from the two of them keeping him up all night. She made a mental note to make sure to only have impromptu parties at Mitch's from now on.

"I'm not much of a small dog person myself." She turned around to see Avi hovering above her looking as handsome as ever. He was gazing at the little beige Terrier in his bed, he too was looking back at him but he didn't make a fuss about seeing and smelling a new person around him. Kirstie smiled, he had already won over her dog in a matter of minutes, just like his owner.

"I'm not really either, I had wanted a Husky but I don't feel right keeping a dog that big in this apartment. Especially with no yard. So I got Toto instead, didn't I Totes?" The dog wagged his tail lazily in response to the amount of love she was giving him.

"Toto? As in Wizard of Oz?" He looked overly proud that he knew some musical knowledge which was met with a roll of her eyes.

"Yes as in the Wizard of Oz." She smiled at the glorified look on his face when he heard he had gotten it right. "Have you warmed up yet?"

He looked down at his fingers, red from the changing temperature and wiggled them. "I think so, I can now feel my fingers which I'm guessing is a good sign." 

Untrusting of his judgement, she stood up and took his hands in hers, looking at them curiously. They were still cold but she could feel the warmth returning to them. She glanced back up at him satisfied with his heat and was met with his questioning gaze. "I'll go and get a warmer coat." That was met with a grin from him when he realised he had passed her test.

"You should have worn a beanie tonight, then maybe you wouldn't be as cold." She called out from her room as she pulled on her coat.

"Well next time you are planning on taking me on a romantic date to a rooftop, let me know in advance so I can plan ahead." Grinning at his silliness as she came out of her room, she grabbed the edges of his jacket and pulled him in for a kiss, reeling at the fact she could now do that without it being weird.

She hummed in contentment when she pulled away and looked up at him, she hadn't a clue how they had managed to get their relationship to where it was now but she wasn't going to complain. "Come on." She nudged him to start walking towards the door but he held her in place by her waist, staring down at her lovingly.

He gulped which made Kirstie nervous. "I really like you." It was sincere, she could tell from the look in his eyes.

She reached down and intwined her hands with his still chilled ones. "I really like you too."


	8. Lover of the Light

The trip to Brooklyn was quick and tourist-less which was always a good thing in NYC. Kirstie had never been on the subway that early in the morning before and was surprised to see it almost empty, for the city that never sleeps, the city's residents did appear to be giving the trains a rest. They had made it to the station in perfect time for a train which they were both thankful for, no one wanted to be stuck on the cold platform for another fifteen minutes for the next one, trains after 2 am in New York were few and far between. They were quiet for most of the trip to the place where they would switch lines, part of that was due to them not wanting to break the silentness of the carriage but another part was due to the surreal feeling of being back where it all began. Even after they had spent most of that night in each others arm, it was odd to them to be on the very same train line that their relationship began and to talk to each other.

They reached the station and things began to pick up. The busyness of a subway way station was beginning to return there, there were plenty of people around getting ready to start their working day or coming home after a night on the town. Avi wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close to him as he led them over to the platform to a Brooklyn bound train. She responded by placing her arm around his waist as well as she could with a guitar on his back, basking in the fact that she could now do this with the guy she'd been dreaming about for so long.

The train came in a short space of time and since there was little seats left that weren't directly next to a drunk person, the two decided to stand. Avi effortless took up his position behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his head into the crook of her neck. She enjoyed it so much that she didn't care about the public display they were putting on and besides, half the people on the train were too drunk to notice.

"Hi." She pushed out during a giggle, his beard was tickling her neck slightly and she swore he was moving his head to tickle her on purpose.

"Hi." He stopped his movement and placed a kiss on her neck which made her grin.

"This is almost dreamlike." She sigh and leaned in closer to him.

He responded by tightening his grip on her. "Tell me about it."

"I mean, last week we had never even spoken to each other and now look at us."

He hummed in response and the two fell back into silence, watching as a few station went by.

"I really want pancakes. I usually have some sort of breakfast meat but Annie's pancakes are rock and roll." He spoke into her shoulder and Kirstie couldn't decipher whether it sent vibrations or shivers throughout her body.

"Annie's?"

"Oh it's where I'm taking you, best twenty-four hour dinner in the whole of NYC. My friend Kevin and I used to go practically everyday in college, we haven't been in a while though." There was a sadness in his tone which Kirstie couldn't quite put her finger on. She decided not to pry, they had only been friendly for less than a day, she didn't want to blow it on a stupid question.

She had never realised how long he had been in town for. "You went to school here?"

"Yeah...Juilliard." He mumbled.

This made her turn round to face him shocked. "You went to Juilliard?"

"Yeah." He looked sheepish again, Kirstie didn't know what he was so ashamed of. Getting into Juilliard - even getting an audition - was an achievement in itself, she knew too many incredible people who attempted to get in there to sing or act but were turned away as if they were talentless.

"That is so great Avi, you should be proud of yourself for even getting accepted let alone graduating." She placed her hands on the arms he had encircled her waist with to try and comfort him from what ever was bothering him. She would get him to talk about it later, it wasn't a good topic to discuss hours after being properly introduced to each other. "I can't believe I'm on a date with a Juilliard graduate." She grinned at him, attempting to defuse the tension which from the chuckle that escaped his lips, she had achieved it.

"And I can't believe I'm on a date with 'Mystery Girl' as my sister and Kevin have dubbed you." She did love a guy who was close to his family and the fact he had told her about her made her giddy inside.

She ran her hands up around his neck and began to play with the hair she found there. "Mystery Girl, eh? Have you been telling them a lot about me?"

"Only how much I hate you and find you disgusting." His lips turned down dramatically into a frown making her giggle. She pulled him in closer to kiss the frown away and only moved away once she had felt it had disappeared.

He removed his arms from around her and grabbed her hand as they approached a station which Kirstie presumed they would be getting off at. As soon as the doors opened, he was dragging her out of the carriage and up onto the street.

She winced as they went out onto the street above, being underground for the best part of half and hour had not prepared her for the pinky-orange glow the newly returned sun was casting on anything that would reflect it. She could tell from the view of Manhattan that they were well and truly in Brooklyn, she loved looking at the skyline, it reminded her of why she had fallen in love with the city. Sometimes, in the midsts of all those buildings, she had forgotten why she had even moved to the city but looking at the skyline from across the bay instantly brought back her aspirational mindset she had when she first arrived.

Avi pulled her into a vintage looking American diner that probably wasn't that old but made to look that way. It was next to a wall of a grand graffiti painting of Gandhi with something written next to it in a language she couldn't understand. Typical Brooklyn quirkiness.

They sat down in a booth Avi had picked out and immediately the server came over to ask them what they would like to drink. She was probably relieved to be serving someone who wasn't drunk so the usual fake smile that occurred on all servers' faces actually looked real on her. She ordered a latte with some caramel flavouring in it she found on the menu and he went for a standard tea.

After he had thanked their server for taking their order, he turned back to her and started the conversation. "So when did you come to New York?"

"Three years ago, I dropped out of college to come and become a performer and I guess I made it." She had been observing the diner as she replied, taking in all the vinyl and checkers. It was surprising to her that something so stereotypical could be found in the hipster capital of New York but then again, it was probably meant to be ironic. Looking over at him, she became breathless, the sun was bathing him in an ethereal glow which made him look too perfect for words.

When he had realised she was staring at him he smirked at her and she swore it made her swoon. "How any shows have you done?"

"Two, I was a chorus member for a few months while I was auditioning for other parts, landed a lead role, got a couple of Tony's and that's about it." She watched as his eyebrows raised in surprise at her Tony's. The server came back with the drinks and took their orders, she went for an omelette, he of course went for the pancakes he was craving.

"Forgive me for intruding but you don't exactly seem excited by the fact you are this mega successful Broadway actress."

Oh, she guessed they were going there after all. She hadn't really talked about how much a small handful of her fans brought her down with anyone, she had only alluded to with Scott and that was it. Yet, sitting across from a guy she had been in awe of for the majority of the year and only gotten to know that day, she was ready to spill her heart out. She guessed it was the kindness that she found in his eyes, or maybe it was the lack of sleep but regardless of the reason after she had taken her first sip of coffee she opened her mouth to speak.

"I'm not anymore. I know I should be, I used to be but then things started going too fast, I got too big before I could realise what was going on. I guess I'm a fish out of water." He reached over the table to intertwine his fingers with hers, she loved how he was looking at her, like he cared. Even after telling him all about her first world problem he still looked at her like he wanted to comfort her which pushed her on. "Its some of my fans which are the hardest to handle. I just can't control them, I've tried but a select few just won't listen. I even had one sit outside my apartment building for a week! They treat me like a rockstar - even at shows. It's so embarrassing, I bet the other actors hate me."

"I doubt they hate you Kirstie, just imagine how much fame they are getting for being in the same show as you. I bet their twitter accounts are soaring." They certainly were, Scott had been Vine famous since a vine of the two of them went viral. They were broken off by the arrival of the food which he was over the moon at. She was grateful, it gave her enough time to regain her composer and to think of a way to change the topic.

His eyes closed savouring the taste as he took a bite out of his food now drenched in syrup. It was cute. He gave off a moan of satisfaction before his eyes met hers. "We really nailed it this time."

She took a bite of her omelette and immediately shared his joy. The food here was phenomenal. If she was told they had covered it in special chemicals to make her enjoy it she wouldn't have been surprised.

"So um, why did you get all iffy on the train when you mentioned college?" She asked timidly, she was scared of riling him up.

"It's pathetic." He groaned as he took another large mouthful of his food. It was nearly all gone all ready. She guessed he was a foodie, she sort of guessed when she was told he was a chef but seeing him gulf down the food confirmed it to her.

"As pathetic as achieving your dreams and complaining about them?" There was truth to her jest but picking fun at herself had made her feel better and from the smile on his food filled mouth, she figured it helped him too.

"Eugh fine." He dramatically took a swig of his drink intending to make her laugh before continuing his story. "I'm pretty sure I'm the only Juilliard music graduate left in New York without a career. Everyone I was friends with at college are orchestra members or choral directors, heck Kevin is even a stand in for the Philharmonic and I'm stuck making soup and living off my sister's money."

His problems really were worse than hers and they certainly weren't pathetic. There was nothing worse than everyone around you succeeding and you being stuck, the same thing had happened to her in college. Everyone in her drama classes succeeded but her, the drama classes she had taken were all very abstract and she really wasn't good at them. "I dropped out of college because I was bad and everyone else was amazing and now look at me. Your time will come, and when it does, I will promote you to hell and back."

"Ha thanks, I'm sure all your fans will love you for it." He beamed at her as he took his last bite of pancakes, she was only a quarter of her was through and was already full. Eating on a morning was not for her.

She reached for her phone and snapped a few secret pictures of him as he looked out of the window. She quickly opened up her Instagram and gestured to him that he could finish her eggs which he jumped the opportunity to do. "Hey Avi, do you have a website?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I'm promoting the heck out of you." She waited for him to wipe his had and handed him her phone. He scoffed at the photo before typing out his address and passed it back for her to send it. In a matter of seconds her fans started to go wild at the picture. Many were questioning who this new guy was, other were suspicious of what she was doing up at this time and a select few were questioning her and Scott's relationship status in relation to Avi.

She finished her latte as she watched him eat just content to be in his presence. She felt his feet slip over to her's under the table and smirked at the childish game of footsie they began to play. She was glad she decided to come and find him that night, she had wanted to talk to him ever since he played her favourite Mumford and Sons song a few weeks back. She swore he had known it was her favourite from they way he had grinned at her and she desperately wanted to chase him off the train to question him but she never did. He made her unbelievably happy just from being in his presence and she hoped to God that she never lost him.

He gulped down the remains of his teas after he had defeated the eggs. Once he had finished he looked straight at her, knowing what was coming next. She didn't want to speak, she didn't want this night to end but she knew that she had a show tonight and he probably had work so logically, they should get some sleep.

"I would offer to walk you home but it's only two stops down to my apartment." He smirked as he began to gather up his things and pulled out some money to pay the waitress. She hated when guys paid for her, especially since she had gotten into money but something told her to let him. It clearly meant more to him to pay for her than vice versa.

"I'll walk you home, it's the least I can do since I nearly killed you with cold." She tried to be jovial but she was upset at the prospect of ending their date. It had been fun, perfect even.

They playfully bashed into each other as they walked to the stop and they even continued it on the train grinning like cheshire cats, she needed to do anything to be distracted at the thought of leaving him. She felt like she did every time he had left her on the train, she wanted to force him to stay with her but she knew that would probably scare him off.

The walk to his apartment had a solemn mood hanging over it. His arm was swung over her shoulder again as she curled into him taking in his neighbourhood. It was cleaner than she expected and there was less graffiti. He came to a halt outside of an antique shop and gestured that he lived above it. That was it, he was leaving her.

She pulled him in for one last kiss goodbye, making sure to pour as much passion and feeling into it as she could so she would make a lasting impression. She tore away for air only to giggle as he dragged her back to him, deepening the kiss. He certainly didn't want to let her go either.

They didn't here a nearby door opening, and they didn't hear footsteps coming over to them but they certainly heard the all too familiar voice to both of them calling out her name.

"Kirstie?"


	9. Agape

The conversation with Esther was awkward to say the least. She was shocked that she had never made the connection. The scar, the hair, the smirk. She felt kinda stupid that she had never put the two together considering that she did see her almost every day. Avi and Kirstie was shocked too. At first, thoughts that Esther was his girlfriend and that he had lied to her had flashed through her brain which she would later feel guilty about. Avi on the other hand was immediately embarrassed, almost like she had caught him having sex, he would never live it down especially now that she is aware of who she was. He couldn't believe that all this time he could have just checked his sister's Facebook to find out her name.

Kirstie had managed to make an excuse to leave as soon as Esther started to fire her questions at them, Avi had pulled her back in for a kiss goodbye despite the fact his sister was watching them before regrettably watching her walk away from him. He turned and brushed past his sister to make his way into their apartment while Esther followed close by firing questions left, right and centre which Avi found all too annoying.

"Did you sleep with her?"

"No." He grumbled.

"Is she Mystery Girl?"

"Yes."

"Was this the first time?"

"Yes." He was almost ready to throw some profanity at his diligent sister and attempt to get some sleep but then she finally said something he was interested in.

"You know her fans have already started to talk about you two, right?"

"Wait, what?" He shot round to face her when those words met his ears. They had made it to the kitchen and Esther had already started making a pot of coffee.

"Yeah the picture she posted. People are speculating. There's some name calling, there's some 'shipping' but mostly people are just upset that it could mean Scirstie is over."

He sat down at there small kitchen table and began to play with his beard. "Scirstie?"

Esther sighed and turned from her coffee making to give him a look he knew too well. The 'you are so out of the loop with pop culture how are you my brother' look. "As in Scott and Kirstie."

"Isn't he gay?" Avi was confused. He never realised how big the whole situation with her fans thinking she was dating Scott was.

"I don't think Scott even knows. And who cares, he's just Scott, I've seen him date girls, I've seen him date guys. I don't think he is one to label."

"So he's not?"

"I doesn't matter. There's nothing there despite all their fans' wishes. He's not going to woo Kirstie from underneath you. Geez, you've only been with her a day and you are already getting jealous." She teased him knowing that it would annoy him and loaded up the comments of the picture while she waited for the coffee to heat up.

When Avi saw the comments he was livid. In between the many people saying that they loved the music on his website or that he was cute, there were a few mean and memorable comments aimed towards Kirstie which Avi guessed were from some of Scott's over-protective jealous fans. Some of the language they were using towards her was vulgar and horrid but he was glad to see that many of her fans had called them out for it. There was a lingering thought at the back of his mind that he just couldn't shake off. He caused this. He caused her to get this hate. She probably hated him already for it.

Knowing him for all the 26 years of his life, Esther could sense immediately what he was being bothered by. She didn't even have to look at him, she could tell by the silence. "Don't worry about her, she's used to it. Plenty of people say mean things about her, it what happens when you get famous. And from the way she was playing tonsil tennis with you back there, I doubt she blames you."

He hoped the teasing would stop but he doubted it would come anytime soon. Not wanting the jibes to continue just then, he left the table to go to his room.

"Hope you have sweet dreams of your darling Kirstie!"

Oh how he loved his sister.

His sleep was restless. He couldn't quite get the thought of the pain he may be causing her out of his mind. He was indirectly hurting her and he could do nothing about it. He thought about posting something on his website but he went against it as he didn't want to say anything with out consulting her first. He considered going to ask Esther for her number but that was sure to end in her unbearable teasing and besides, he really should talk to her in person.

Avi managed to sleep on and off for about four hours before he got up feeling defeated. Esther was good with anything that wasn't about his relationships, she just joked to avoid thinking about her brother's romantic exploits. There was only one person he trusted to give him sane advice in this situation and he was only a phone call away. He pulled out his phone and rang Kevin

The cellist didn't pick up. It was lunchtime so he probably wasn't up to anything too important, he would call back when he was free. In the meantime, he powered up his battered old laptop to see if anything new was happening. He checked his website first and was shocked to see the large increase in his visitor statistics over the last few hours. He'd probably earn more from the adverts on his website in those hours than he had the entire month. Luckily, he had never enabled any kind of commenting system so his site was at least not flooded with negativity from her all too passionate 'fans'. Avi then attempted to navigate his way through her social media accounts but he wasn't well versed in how to use them so all he found out was who she was following. The lack of sleep forced him to grumpily give up his attempt at figuring out Instagram and he impatiently pulled out his phone to call Kevin once more. This time, he picked up.

"Hey, how's it going?"

Avi very audibly sighed down the phone. "You know Mystery Girl?"

"Yeah?" He could hear the anticipation in his voice.

"Well we sort of - hung out last night."

"Oh Avi, please tell me you didn't do something un-holy on the first date." Usually Avi would laugh at that remark but not today, he was too frazzled.

"No, no, no. That's not the problem here man."

"Thank goodness. Then what's tearing you up? Is she awful or something?"

"She's perfect." He said a little too quickly. "Er this is going to sound stupid."

"I'm all ears. You'd know I'd do anything for you." Kevin had stuck with Avi through thick and thin. Even when all their other friends started to become big shots in the city, Kevin had chosen Avi over them. They were Kevin and Avi. The best bro-mance the city had ever seen.

"Well turns out she's like this big Broadway person and people think she's dating her co-star but this morning she posted a picture of me and now everyone is hating on her."

"Has she deleted the picture?"

"I don't think so." He wouldn't know, he couldn't figure out where it was.

"Then it really is stupid. The only one who cares about it is you. If she was annoyed, she would have deleted it in an instance."

"Okay?" He sounded unsure. He wanted to believe Kevin but that didn't mean he could get his mind to agree to it.

"Look, you need to stop worrying what other people think, you like her yes?"

He answered immediately. "Of course."

"And she likes you?"

"She says so."

"Then don't sweat it. What is going on between you only matters between you. You are not dating the rest of the world. Besides, she's a grown women, you don't have to feel guilty for things she has chosen to do"

"Yeah I guess." Kevin's words of wisdom did help a little. He knew he was right. He shouldn't worry about her. She chose to post it even though she had a good idea what was going to come, she obviously didn't care. However, Avi did still feel guilty. Even though it was her actions, he still could have done something about it. Kevin, knowing his best friend better than he knew himself, latched on to the weakness in his voice.

"Just talk to her bro. Tell her how you feel - sorry man, I have to go, my brake is over. Call me later if you need anything." With that he hung up leaving Avi to worry alone.

As always, Kevin was correct. If he had a problem he should tell her, after all relationships were built on trust and communication. They wouldn't exactly be off to a good start if he was already keeping things from her. He knew he would probably be seeing her that night after work on the train. He could talk to her then. But what would he say?

Avi settled on the only thing he knew how to do well. He would try and tell her through music.

He found himself at Grand Central almost half a day later anxiously waiting for the train with his guitar in hand. He had left his usual set up at home, he wasn't after money tonight, he just needed to tell her. The majority the day he had spent searching for the perfect song to perform, he knew she would be paying attention so it had to perfect. He had pulled his music collection apart looking for a tune with meaning, things were either too complicated to learn in one day or didn't have the right lyrics. But then he found it in a pile of music Esther had given him for his last birthday that he'd never listen to. It was simple to learn and more or less had the right message, he only had to cut a couple of lines.

For the first time in a while, Avi had actually enjoyed work. It had kept his mind off of seeing her again that night and after his shift was over, he immediately wanted to work again. When he wasn't pre-occupied, his mind wandered into a field of doubts. Would she change her mind? Did she hate him? Was last night one big mistake? What if it wasn't the perfect song? What if she got on a different train?

Avi didn't even consider the idea that she may not come back to see him that night until he was on the train. It was a very real possibility in his mind. Maybe things that morning had been too embarrassing for her to return. Maybe Esther had said something at the show that had scared her off? Avi wouldn't know until the train got to he stop which experience dictated to him it would any second.

He didn't see her when the train first pulled in but then again the platform looked more like a blurry sea of heads from the slowing down train. His heart dropped a little when he couldn't catch a glimpse of her when the train had stopped. The doors had opened and closed and there was no sight of her. She wasn't coming after all.

"Looking for me?" The familiar voice made him smile as he turned around to meet her, all his cares leaving his head for a second, he was just relieved she was there. He figured that he had been so busy looking for her down the majority of the train that he had neglected the one door that was behind him.

But she was there. As beautiful as ever. She could wear a trash bag and still make his heart feel like it was trying to escape his chest.

"Hi." He stammered, his mind still clouded with relief.

She giggled, noting the likeness of the conversation to the one they had the previous night. "Hi."

"I um wanted to play you something." By this point, Avi was blushing and clammy but that still didn't make him take his eyes off of her.

She raised her eyebrow, intrigued about what he was going to play. "Oh really?"

Instead of replying, he positioned his guitar and started to sing despite the confused looks he was being given by the other passengers trying to decide whether he was a busker or just some boyfriend trying to do a romantic gesture. He figured that the sooner he started to play the better. The more he waited, the more his doubts plagued his mind. He had to let them out.

Agape, please don't dissipate, I know that I've got it all wrong

Kirstie looked somewhat confused. She was trying to figure out the song while trying to figure out what he had apparently done wrong. The look wasn't enough to discourage him though and he continued to sing, already gathering an audience.

I'm reaching out, to touch your voice but baby I'm clutching at straws.

All she had managed to gather so far was that he was upset he had done something wrong and that he didn't feel like he could explain it to her? Kirstie normally would have just stood there, dreamily smiling at him but she was determined to figure out what he was trying to say. The fact that he had worn his hair down that night was not helping her to not stare and grin at him like a manic.

For I'm so scared of losing you and I don't know what I can do about it, about it.

Avi was surprised he had managed to get that far through the song without his voice wavering. There was just something so sincere about how she was looking at him that made him confident and unashamed.

So tell me how long love before you go and leave me here on my own. I know it.

Kirstie guided him out of the way of the people wanting to get off the train, happy that she no longer had to worry about him leaving, and into a more secure area, they were lucky really that the carriage they were on was one with little seating areas. She couldn't believe what he was saying. She certainly wasn't mad at him. Scott wasn't mad at him - as a matter of fact he had even tweeted about how much he loved Avi's music to help defuse the comments. After the magical night the two had had the night before, she was positive she was never going to leave him anytime soon but somehow he had gotten it into his mind.

I don't want to know who I am without you.

She placed her hand over his to gesture for him to stop playing and Avi felt his heart in his stomach. She was going to leave him, he knew it. 

He was pleasantly surprised when she found a way to move his guitar from between them and onto his back with out hitting those around him and pulled him into a hug. It was nice to have her close again especially after a day of worrying. He felt safe in her arms, like he belonged, like none of his doubts mattered as he had her close. She pulled away which felt too soon but was actually a whole stop or two and looked up at him, hands playing with the buttons on his shirt while he still held her.

"What are you worried about?"

"I saw the comments." He stared down at her, anxious of her reply.

She pouted at him before replying. "Don't worry about them... I knew perfectly well what people were going to say when I posted it - just think about how many new people will be listening. Any publicity is good publicity."

"I'd happily be the poorest guy on the planet if it meant no one was mean to you." He pulled her nearer to him determined never to let her go. 

"While that is ever so noble of you, it's unnecessary. I will always have haters for as long as I'm in the limelight. At least now I'm getting trolled for something I am doing instead of a rumour." She ran her hands up his chest to rest them on his shoulders and began to stroke him there. 

"I still feel bad. If I were you I would end this." He closed her eyes and looked away from her. He didn't want some as wonderful as her to see him upset. 

She noticed that they were approaching the stop for her apartment and she moved his face back to meet hers. She sent him a reassuring smile while playing with his beard which made a fluttering feeling appear in both of their stomachs. She stepped away from him and his hands quickly found hers in attempt to make up for the loss of contact.

Tugging on his hand as the train doors snapped open, she pulled the cautious Avi out of the carriage, determined to show him just how badly she didn't want them to end.


	10. Love Like Ghosts

Waking up to find Avi still in her bed, sheets loosely covering his body, Kirstie couldn't help but smile. There were worse things to wake up to on a morning. She had two performances that day and she knew she would have to get up soon but laying there, his arm wrapped lazily around her and his hair a mess across her pillows, she never wanted to move.

She knew the previous night, as tender as it was, shouldn't have happened. It was too quick, they had only been seeing each other a day but that didn't mean she regretted doing it. It felt right, Kirstie would go as far to say perfect - everything had been wonderful.

*

He was nervous at first, clearly he had not been with someone for a while but she didn't blame him, neither had she. When they had gotten to her apartment he didn't say a word, he just stood there stiffly as she pulled his guitar off of him and placed it on the couch careful not to wake the sleeping dog in the room. Once she had dragged him down for a kiss, he had become responsive. His hands had instinctively found her hips while her hands were already running through the hair that she loved. She had received a low groan from him when she had pulled on it and deepened the kiss, and an even lower one when she had added tongue. They parted for a second to catch their breath and she saw the lust radiating from his eyes. It turned her on - well she was already turned on but that really did for her. She would have happily had him right there and then in her living room but she was determined that it wasn't going to be some quick casual sex. She needed to show him what he meant to her and how much it would take for her to even think about calling whatever they had off. She was going to take her time with him, she needed it just as much as he did.

She slipped out of her heels and he had to adjust to the change it height, leaning down lower. Knowing where this was heading, he kicked off his shoes, grateful he had chosen not to wear converse that night. His leather jacket made its way to the floor in little time and from the eagerness of his hands on the buttons of her shirt, he was determined to get it to join his jacket on the ground. Kirstie took that moment to slow things down. Pulling away, she reached for his hands getting them to rest their pursuit of her buttons and tugged him in the direction of her bedroom. He was grinning from ear to ear like a fool as he followed.

Not wanting to be interrupted by her dog, she closed her door before pushing him backwards onto her bed. The grin on his face was soon changed to an expression of pleasure as she climbed on top of him and begun to shower his neck with forceful kisses. She was determined to make her mark there, to remind him for the next day or two that she was more than happy to call him her's despite what some shitty people told her online. His hips ground into her as he squirmed underneath her, wishing to speed things up.

It was her time to groan when she felt him through his jeans. It was nice to feel wanted especially by a guy she had been wanting for too long. He sat up, forcing her to stop her attack on his neck and rejoin his lips with hers. She felt his hands slip under her shirt and her heart rate quickened at the contact only to feel them removed again when he remembered that he was allowed to remove the article completely. He hastily begun to undo her buttons, they were flimsy and his hands were shaking. Kirstie laughed at his clumsiness for a brief moment before impatiently helping him out. He had a sharp intake of breath when he saw her shirtless for the first time which made her self conscious. This insecurity was rapidly removed by the presence of his hands on her bare skin and his lips at her neck. While he was preoccupied, she made a hasty job of his shirt and sent it flying to the floor. Her hands ran down the newly discovered skin and shifted him back onto his back, more than content to continue their activity further.

The rest of the night had been clumsy and disordered as every first time should be but it was beyond great. They were both as awkward as each other, he couldn't work out the clasp on her bra and she couldn't work out his belt buckle, but that only added to the experiences. Their moans were joined by giggles and it was perfect. By the end of the night, she could no longer figure out where he started and where she ended; an overwhelming feeling of satisfaction had lingered in the air into the next day.

*

She woke him up with a trail of light kisses across his shoulder which he adorably raised a hand to squat away, not realising who or what was waking him. She would have liked to let him sleep in a little more but she had promised to meet Scott for a pre-show lunch and that meeting was only an hour away.

"Avi." She groaned as she moved on to his neck which she had successfully managed to mark the night before, cautious not to crush him underneath her.

"What?" He muttered almost too quiet to hear. She probably would have missed him replying if it was for the feeling of his voice in his chest.

"I have a show soon and I'm going to lunch with Scott in like an hour." She sat up, clasping the sheet to her chest to give him room to move around. He hoisted himself up and rubbed his eyes before glancing round the room groggily taking in his surroundings confused. She got that all too familiar feeling in her stomach when she saw him beam from remembering where he was. He leaned over to pull her into a sloppy morning kiss, Kirstie's favourite kind. Afterwards, he fell back against the bed, curling up in as much of the sheets as she would allow him and drowsily began to play with the hand which was still resting by him.

His eyes were fixated on her hand in his as he spoke. "Erm, was last night good?"

She had forgotten how needy guys were for compliments after sex, and usually she would just ignore it, not wanting to stroke their egos but there was something so candid in his voice that made her want to comply. He was laying adorably half asleep in her bed, naked, and with the most captivating look on his face. How could she not?

"Well, it was good enough to make me ask for another round." She smirked and bent down to place a light kiss on the corner of his mouth. She pulled away to see the blush had already appeared on his face. The blonde leant in for one more kiss not being able to resit how adorable he was before departing from the bed to start getting ready for the day ahead. She knew his eyes were on her as she moved around the room but she didn't care, he had seen everything already, she had nothing to be ashamed off.

"I'm just going to take a shower. Feel free to linger around." She took one last look at him laying in her bed before moving towards the shower. Showering when she woke up was a new occurrence for Kirstie. She was used to showering at night after her shows to relax herself but the day before she had gone without for him. She had become to nervous after her show to try and work the showers at the theatre so had taken to sitting nervously in her dressing room instead. Reapplying her make up over and over again until she deemed it perfect. Her nights after the show had now been taken up with him so the day before she had stopped her nightly shower routine so she could spend her nights with him. She wasn't complaining, he was a very good alternative.

Once she had finished her shower, she came out to find him almost fully clothed and pulling his jeans out from under the bed. Kirstie giggled, she couldn't figure out how they had managed to get there, the previous night hadn't been that wild. She watched as he hilariously hopped around in the bid to put on his pants as she herself went around the room collecting her clothes for the day.

"Hey Avi?"

He was laying back on the bed again, legs dangling over the sides and his eyes were closed. "Hmm?"

"Do you mind going to feed my dog? Just give him some water and the food is in one of the cupboards - you can't miss it."

"Sure." He lazily sat back up and stumbled over to her for a kiss before leaving the room. She guessed he wasn't a morning person.

After she had painstakingly dried her hair, got dressed and put on her make up, she came out of the room to find her puppy excitedly playing with Avi. "You know, he usually takes a while to warm up to people but you have befriended him in what? One day?"

"I'm good with dogs, they probably think I'm one of them." He mumbled and turned away from the dog to see the beautiful girl before him. "Oh you may want to check your phone, Esther had text me about seventy times. Something has happened."

From the tone of his voice and the guilty look on his face, she knew it was about her fans and quickly searched for where her phone ended up the night before. At first glance, nothing looked too dramatic, she had only gotten a few texts from Scott - nothing out of the ordinary. But then she opened them. He had explained that rumours were floating around twitter which confused Kirstie, weren't they always? What was so special about this? His next text was a photo. Ah, that will be it.

It was a photo of the two of them on the train last night standing way too close to be innocent. So that was it then, they were out. They were out before they had even discussed whether they wanted to be a thing or not. Shit.

She decided against checking her social media, she didn't want to read what some people would have to say. It was true that their words had stopped getting to her, over the past year she had grew thicker skin and come to realise that behind those words were people's own insecurities and not hatred but that didn't mean that she liked reading them.

"Don't worry about it, Scott and I will start doing damage control at lunch. We will have this calmed down in no time." She sent a reassuring smile his way and pulled him up for a hug. It was nice to be in his arms again. She had only been away from him for nearly half and hour but she still missed the felling she got when he was in her presence.

He rested his head on her shoulder. "What are you going to say? Are you going to pretend like this is not a thing? I mean, I wouldn't mind if you do. It is you that's getting the brunt of it all."

"I don't mind at all. Would you prefer me to do that? Once it's out, it's out. There's not backtracking on the internet." She mumbled into his neck and felt him move back to look at her.

His brow was furrowed in a questioning manner. "What are we?"

"What do you mean?" She looked up at him confused. She hoped she knew what he was asking, she had been wondering the same thing but she wasn't exactly going to suggest they got together if that was not what he was on about.

He gulped before answering. "Well are we together or what?" His tone was hesitant, scared of what her answer will be.

A grin broke out on her face when she had realised what he was asking. "I'd...like to give it a try. We didn't stare at each other for like 6 months for nothing."

"For real?" He looked like a child who had been told he could stay up past his bed time, he was ecstatic.

The sheer joy that he had just shown made Kirstie not able to resit reaching up to kiss him once more then pulled away, remaining just inches from his face. "Why not? I like you, you like me - the last few days had been fantastic. Why would we want to stop this?"

"So...girlfriend." He smirked down at her like a middle schooler. "What are you going to say? I'd only be comfortable with everything coming out if you were."

She pulled away even more, leaning back to get a clear look at his expressions trying to figure out whether he was lying. "Are you sure? I know how uncomfortable it makes you."

He nodded. "100 percent"

"Do you want to do it together - post something or what not?"

"Um sure? A pictures worth a thousand words right?" She pulled away from him to reach for the phone she had put down.

Opening up her camera, she came back next to him and wrapped an arm around him. "Exactly! Now smile!" She held up the phone in front of them and turned to give him a peck on the cheek. She needed to get the message across that they were together but she didn't want to flood her fans with the idea of being a couple just yet. They were still used to the idea of her and Scott, she didn't want to hit them with a picture of them kissing just yet.

She smiled as she looked down at her phone. "Perfect! What should the caption be? Do we want to explain it or allude to it?"

"Hmmm just allude to it? If we tell them straight it will sound forced." He was right. If they posted a paragraph explaining everything just then it would sound fake, like they were only saying they were together to stop her reputation from being shattered by nasty rumours. It would be hard to be recognised as a credible couple like that.

"What shall we say then?"

"I have an idea - pass me your phone." Kirstie passed him her phone and watched as he hastily typed away and gave it back to her. It was an ideal caption, it captured and shared the essence of them as a couple without being too overbearing.

"I sing all day and I love you through the night."


	11. Wonderful Things

"I see someone had fun last night, are you cheating on me?" Scott mocked as Kirstie took her place opposite him in a cafe in Harlem. She had prepared herself for all the teasing that was going to come her way on the trip over there so she was ready to play along.

"Maybe." She brushed his comment off and began to look through the menu knowing it would be driving him crazy. She knew he was desperate for the gossip, she'd known him too long to know he never passed up the opportunity to nosey. She had even made a dramatically slow walk over to the bar to order an iced tea, knowing he was glaring at her the whole way. It wasn't only Scott who loved to tease.

"I can't believe you slept with someone else." He joked which started Kirstie. How did he know? She was certain that they hadn't mentioned that in the post.

"Wait what?" She had snapped out of her act the moment she heard he knew more than he should.

"Come on Kirst, it's obvious. The picture from the train which I'm still not sure what you were doing on at that time of day, the 'love you through the night' stuff. Not to mention his neck looks like the guy had been attacked and we both know they don't get there by accident..." He sassily trailed off and began to sip his drink through a straw, watching as she squirmed under his words.

"Ummm."

"I totally know you got some last night Kirstie so spill." He watched it amused as she turned beet red. "You still need to tell me all about this Prince Charming of yours especially since I saved your ass yesterday no questioned asked. Also, from the look on your face when you walked in here, he is a beast in the bedroom and you know how I love a good sex story."

She anxiously glanced around the cafe to see if anyone was listening in. Scott really knew how to embarrass her but she loved him for it. "Well as you know he's called Avi. He's actually Esther's little brother."

"Really? I'll remember to mention to her about how good her little bro is in bed. Now spill, I want all the good details - the other stuff can come later." He leaned forward on the table to intimidate her into telling him everything.

"If I admit to sleeping with him could we please stop talking about it and go back to regular questions?" She squeaked out, desperate for the conversation they were having to be over. Not only were they in a very public restaurant but he was her best friend (and supposed boyfriend) and talking to him about that was just weird.

"Deal."He seemed satisfied for now but Kirstie knew he would start asking her about it again the first chance he had.

"Okay then I slept with him. Now, Scotty, ask me some normal, mature questions." She calmly took a sip of her iced tea to regain her composure. She could tell she was grinning at the memory of the previous night and that her cheeks were probably a lovely cherry colour.

"How did y'all meet?"

"He busks on the train I get after the shows and he caught my eye. Took us like 5 months to gather up the courage to talk to each other."

"A busker, hmm? It's practically Lady and the Tramp already." He smirked amusedly at his own reference. "You best let me meet him, I need to test whether he is worthy of my dear co-star or not."

"Well, technically you have already met him..." She watched as his face showed the signs of him desperately searching his brain for what she was talking about.

"What? When?" His jaw was so wide open that Kirstie was sure it must of been painful.

"Remember when you and Mitch got wasted at mine? I brought him by before escaping with him up to the roof." She smiled at him out of pleasure of being the dominate one in the conversation.

"Please tell me you didn't do it on the roof." He asked slowly, hesitant for her answer.

"We didn't."

He huffed melodramatically out of relief. "Thank God! If you had, you would have had to bleach it down before I step foot on it again."

The waitress had come over to take their order for food which gave the two a much needed break from the slightly uncomfortable situation.

"Are you like a thing now? Like Facebook official" Scott asked after the waitress had left.

She snorted at his childishness. "Yep, we have decided to give it a go."

"So... how does he make you feel?" He said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. She knew what he wanted and she certainly was not going to give him it.

"He make's me feel wonderful things." Kirstie attempted to keep the conversation as PG as she could.

"Wow, Kirst. I think this is the happiest I have seen you in a long time and I've seen you at a Kelly Clarkson concert." He looked genuinely thrilled for her which made her swell with happiness.

She bit her lip before answering. "Yeah - I think I am...hey who are you texting?" The presence of his phone in his hand was noted by her.

"Mitchie." He sung.

She raised her eyebrows in question. "Why?" Oh no, what are they up to.

"Well he was the one that tipped me off that your boyf left your apartment this morning. So I thought the least I could do was tell him Lover Boy is not a mass murderer who was taking you somewhere to be killed." He replied nonchalantly, typing away on his phone with a slight smile on his face. She knew she had to play matchmaker for the two, and fast. Mitch was a well sort after person after all, if Scott didn't make a move soon, she knew someone else could very easily come along and whisk him away.

Kirstie moved the conversation onto another topic since the thought of what Scott and Mitch were saying in the discussion of her relationships behind her back was way too much to think about at lunch time.

They finished their lunch with little mentioning of Avi and time to spare to get to the theatre. They took the train over and Kirstie noted how lonely it felt without Avi there with her, despite the fact it was probably one of the most crowned trains she had ever seen. Scott was much more in favour for hailing a cab but since the theatre was halfway down the island from where they were, they could have been stuck in traffic for hours.

The matinee show went without a hitch. She had gotten stage fright for the first time in months at the thought of facing a crowd full of people, some of who she knew would be judging her for what she posted this morning. It didn't help that just before she was going to walk on stage for the first time, Esther had come up to her and whispered in her ear: "By the look of my brother's neck, someone enjoyed themselves last night." However, other than the occasional remark from Scott and Esther back stage, the performance was spot on.

Scott and her had returned to her apartment for something to eat and he had somehow managed to convince her to let him and Mitch (who had decided to invite himself down for dinner when he had heard Scott was there) to take Toto for a walk. She was usually over protective when it came to her dog and other people but she figured they had been round him while they were drunk off their heads and nothing had happened so a little walk wouldn't hurt. Plus she would have needed to do it anyway so they were really just saving her time.

She picked up her phone and smiled at the picture of her and Avi she had set as her wallpaper. Her phone had been buzzing none stop from friends and family asking her what was going on, they seemed worried at the amount of notice she was getting - especially her mom, so she decided to take the time while they were gone constructing a text explaining the situation and sent it to everyone. Kirstie then took to twitter to reply some of the many questions she had been given. She was careful to pick some that weren't too intrusive into her life and wouldn't tell details to people who she didn't want getting involved in her private life. She corrected quite a few of her fans, who had been religiously telling people to calm down as Avi was just a close friend and that she was still dating Scott, and told them that her and Scott weren't together. She had even replied to one tweet where she stated that she was seeing Avi, she knew they had agreed that they didn't want to feel like they needed to spell out their relationship to people but she was struggling to cope with all the questions and they didn't seem to be slowing down.

She groaned when she noticed that instead of the questions slowing down, they were instead being replaced with many shocked replies and some tweets with some very offensive words being thrown around. The vast majority of them were people telling her how glad they were that she had found someone she cares about but these were seriously over shadowed by the negative ones. It angered Kirstie that the majority of those negative comments were directed towards Avi, they were calling him ugly, making mean comments about his hair and some even said his music sucked. There was one comment that stood out to her in which the person had stated they knew her and that she had told them Avi had forced her to be in a relationship with him for fame. She now understood how Avi felt the day before, it was one thing to hear negativity about yourself but when someone posts slander about someone you care about dearly, it hurts like hell. Especially when the reason they are getting hate is something to do with you.

She decided to take the photo and repost it on another site where she wasn't restricted to 140 characters so she could address the hate. She was enraged, she couldn't believe that people who called themselves her 'fans' could say such mean things. She understood if they were upset about the development, she knew from experience that when you 'shipped' someone and any hope of them coming true was shattered it actually hurt. However, that was no excuse to take to your keyboard to attack someone they knew nothing about.

'I know this doesn't apply to most of you, the majority of you have been super supportive and your comments have been lovely but a small bunch of people have been saying some real nasty things regarding Avi and I. I understand that some of you are upset but that does not give you an excuse to be so awful about him in particular. I'm used to the occasional troll but some of these comments are beyond hurtful, they are personal digs at him and I'm not okay with that. He did not force me into anything, he does not beat me, I would go as far as to say he is the nicest guy I know. Please don't say anything to us that you wouldn't say to our faces and remember that words can hurt. Thank you to the vast majority of you who had been nice, I know it may come as a shock to you that I've suddenly have this great guy in my life and I applaud you for being civil about it - you guys truly are the best fans and I love you lots. xxx'

She sent a copy of it to Avi before posting it and asked if he was comfortable with her telling her followers that. His reply came quickly, he agreed that it was fine but he had sent her a series of texts afterward asking if she was okay, he was clearly worried about her wellbeing which made Kirstie feel warm. It was a lovely feeling to know someone was concerned about her feelings. She took a moment to look over her spelling and grammar before pushing send and replied to Avi that they would talk about it tonight.

She really needed to get herself a publicist if this continued to happen every time she posted a picture.


	12. Bridge Over Troubled Water

"HOW DARE YOU CHEAT ON SCOTT. YOU WHOR-"

Kirstie snapped her head around mid performance to detect where the ruckus was coming from. She spotted a young man who, from his position by the back of the theatre, had seemingly not bought a ticket to the show and had managed to just walked in off of the street. She watched as he was pulled out by the doormen, one with his hands over the interrupters mouth while the other held his arms to his side. The two were walking him out - well more like dragging - when the interrupter broke free.

"YOU BITCH, YOU SHOULD GO AND KILL -" One of the doormen had tackled the guy to the ground, knocking him off mid sentence. Kirstie made a note to buy those guys gifts for saving her from hearing the rest of that sentence. Even though she got a lot of hate online, that was nothing compared to when she got it in person. It was a rarity, online people feel protected behind a screen so people liked to do it but when it came to telling her in person, no one usually dared - who in their right mind loved confrontation. This guy apparently did.

Blinking back tears, she turned back to look a Scott suspecting him to be staring at her and wondering why she had stopped singing midway through their big number yet instead he too was staring towards the back of the theatre to see the commotion. He looked enraged. His fists were clenched at his sides and his face looked as if he was planning to go and murder the guy (she wouldn't have blamed him if she did). Kirstie couldn't see them but she knew that the orchestra had stopped playing underneath her, probably looking along with the entire audience towards the back. She wanted to be swallowed up by the stage, she caused this, how embarrassing.

No longer caring about the performance, she ran off to stage left and let the tears fall. Scott didn't follow, she wasn't sure whether or not he had even heard her run off - the sound guy had luckily turned off their microphones so the sounds of her sobs was not echoed around the auditorium. Esther however had made it round to the side of the stage she had run off to, she had taken the backstage route as she was ever the professional and as soon as she got there she had pulled Kirstie into her arms.

"He's an ass. He probably lives in his parents basement and still eats kids meals when they take him out." Esther wispered, trying to comfort the girl who was currently sobbing onto her chest. She wished Avi was here - they all did. "He's a loser, don't listen to him Kirst."

Scott finally decided to join them and ran up to them, slightly out of breath. Since Esther had made it round to Kirstie, Scott had managed to talk to someone high up in the theatre from the side of the stage. "He's in the security office, they are going to get the police involved but they doubt anything will come of it. I'm so sorry Kirst."

"Should I call Avi?" Esther directed Kirstie into Scott's arms and moved to get her phone out of her pocket and switched it on.

"No,no, he will be working." Kirstie chocked out through sobs.

"Est, could you take her to yours tonight? I don't want to leave her alone and I need to go and pick up my mom from the airport at 3 as she can't fly at a normal time." Scott looked over Kirstie's head, completely taking her out of the conversation now. He had switched into protective best friend mode, only bothered with what was the best for his friend.

Esther had begun to step back into her roll as Stage Manager and had begun ordering people around. "Yeah sure. Avi and I will take good care of her." She managed to call out while in the middle of her enforcing her commands.

"Her is right here guys." Kirstie attempted to joke but she just sounded like a strangled mess. Kirstie was content with her friend's decisions for her, Esther was the most mothering figure she knew and she was desperate to see Avi.

Scott pulled her closer and whispered into her hair. "I'll text Mitch to watch Totes, everything is going to be alright."

"I'm going to go cancel the show." She felt Esther's hand on her back before she walked away to work the radio.

That's how Kirstie found herself sitting, wrapped up in blankets with a hot chocolate in hand in the living room of the Kaplan's at 11pm. Esther had busied herself at the kitchen table behind Kirstie, from what she could tell, she was emailing with their director and producers to explain what had happened and how they were going to refund things. Kirstie had searched Avi apartment with her eyes from the position on the couch. If she wasn't feeling down, she was sure she would be walking around and picking up things like the family portrait they had on the bookcase or would be having a closer look at one of the trophies that were on a table against the wall. Instead all she could do was look, basking in the surealness of being in his personal space and eager to take a look inside his bedroom.

"Hey Avriel." Esther's voice rang through the apartment as the door opened to reveal the man himself coming in and taking off his shoes. Avi had told her what his actually name was so she was only slightly surprised when she heard it being said out loud - it was still foreign to her to associate that name with him. She placed her mug on the table in front of her, turned around and smiled at the sight of him, reassured even by his presence even though he hadn't spotted her yet. His work uniform was too big on him and slightly dirty but the faded bruises on his neck really complimented the outfit and made her grin. He began to pull the shirt over his head and Kirstie eyes immediately dropped to his chest, checking him out. The night before she hadn't had much time to take him all in but she was quickly making up for it by ogling him from afar.

"Erm Avi?" Esther shuffled in her seat as Avi started to remove his pants. Throwing a quick glance at Kirstie, she was slightly freaked out to find her viewing her little brother like he was a cute animal in the Zoo. The slight smile that had appeared on her face at the sight of Avi did make Esther feel better at seeing the slightly intimate look she was giving him but it still weirded her out. He was her disgusting baby brother, the one who would annoy her whenever she played piano, the one who used to pull her hair just for the fun of it, the one who in her eyes was still an annoying ten year old who had never heard of getting a wash.

"Hmm." He hummed in response as he threw his uniform into the washing machine, he was so glad Esther had decided to buy one for the apartment, he never would have made it to see Kirstie in time if he had had to go somewhere else to wash his clothes.

"We have a visitor." She stuttered out as he shot upright like a pole and anxiously glanced around the apartment expecting to see Kevin or one of Esther's friends.

"It's not something I haven't already seen before." Kirstie mumbled delicately when his eyes fell on her. His face broke out into a smile as he walked towards in only his underwear but it quickly fell off of his face when he realised she wasn't there just to have a chat.

Avi nervously glanced back at his sister before moving closer to Kirstie. "What's happened? What's wrong?"

"Some jerk decided to take his anger out on Kirstie during a performance." Esther responded from the kitchen watching her brother, anticipating his response.

"WHAT?"

"Don't worry Avi, we sorted it all out," Esther flicked her eyes from her brother to his girlfriend noticing that they seemed to be dying to speak to each other, and hold each other, without her there. "I'll be in my room if you need anything." She would have made a snide remark about keeping the noise down if they decided to do anything fun but it wasn't the time and place for jokes.

"Are...are you okay?" He gently asked and took his place next to her on the couch.

She opened her arms and allowed him to join her in her blanket cocoon. "Not really."

His arms weaved their way around her body as he pulled her closer. "I'm sorry -

"- don't be. It wasn't your fault." She seemed to have known what he was going to say before he had even said it.

He placed a kiss on her forehead out of appreciation of her sympathy before mumbling into her hair. "Well I do have something to do with it." He felt guilty no matter how much she told him otherwise. If he hadn't had stayed that day on the train, she wouldn't be there in his arms with a swollen tear stained face. It pained him to see her that way and the fact he had a part in it made him hate himself.

"True but then so do I."

"I would totally understand if you want to end this. It's not fair on you." He pushed her away from him gently, not to indicate what her answer should be but to save some awkwardness just in case she chose what he was thinking.

"Hey Avi, look at me." She effortlessly pulled his face back towards her and held it in place with her hands on both cheeks. "I will never give up on you that easily, I thought I made that pretty clear last night..."

She saw the cheeky little smile that appeared on his face and felt as his cheeks warm up under her hands. At least he wasn't feeling sorrowful anymore.

Her hands pulled him closer and her hands were quickly replaced by a collection of feather light kisses all over his face. She let out a giggle as his arms once again found there way around her and dragged her down on top of him as he laid back against the couch. His lips met hers for the first time that night and he was reminded of just why he was willing to fight for her. Her hands hastily found his hair and tugged it out of the bun it was currently in, desperate to get her hands tangled in it. She felt his skin meet hers as his wandering hands made their way under her shirt. She could feel his bare abdomen against hers where her shirt had been hitched up and she was reminded of the last time she felt that, the night before. She was so glad he had not gotten redressed yet.

"Ahem." They were interrupted just as she had gotten his hair down and he had begun to work his lips on her jaw. His sister must have been alerted to the change in action between them and had left her room. She was glad to see that Kirstie was no longer feeling miserable but she was not glad to see that. As Kirstie raised her head to guiltily look over at the friend she had forgotten was in the apartment with them, she was met not with her glare but her hands dramatically covering her eyes. "That couch is wool and cost more than you could imagine so please don't fornicate on it...Thank you."

Avi's hands flew off her in a flash and held them above his head as Kirstie collapsed embarrassed against his chest. "Got it."

They heard the door close behind them and the dulcet tones of Simon and Garfunkel erupting from her room. Avi was amazed, he knew that that was her way of telling them it was okay for them to continue but Esther never let him bring girls back to the apartment. It was an unwritten rule between the two, he brought back no girls, she brought back no guys. He would have to thank her in the morning.

"I think that's our signal to move things to your room." She ran her hands along his collar bones which was met with a gulp from him.

"err - it's a mess." He apprehensively ran his hands through his newly exposed hair.

"So?" Her eyebrows shot up as she looked down at him.

His arms fell back onto her, holding her tight against him once more. "Well you won't like it."

"Avi, I have publicly declared that I wanna be with you, I don't think a little mess will turn me running." Removing herself from on top of him and the couch, she grinned at him and offered him a hand up.

He wrapped his arms around her to pull her in for a hug, it wasn't sexual, just comforting. Leaning back slightly, his hands tucked her hair behind her ears as he relished in how beautiful she looked, even with her eyes all puffy and red. He was falling for this girl, he knew it in the very core of him. The night before she had been the one reassuring him but know he knew it had to be the other way round. He was determined to make her feel special, to take away the pain of the night, to make her feel loved. 

Her hands found his as he walked backwards, determined not to break the eye contact, leading her towards his room with a slight smirk on his face.

She was too distracted by him (and his hips) to care about the mess his room was in.


	13. Hold Back The River

"So you have to type everything in 140 characters?"

It was a few days after the interruption at the theatre and the two were on the train attempting to set Avi up a twitter account while struggling from being underground. Things had begun to die down since they were forced out to the public, the general opinion was still a negative one but there were less people being vocal about it which was something. The interruption at the theatre turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Many news outlets had picked up on what had happened and the man had been publicly shamed; he served as a reminder to her fans just how out of hand some of them could be.

Avi, even though he was uncomfortable at the comments that were sent his way, was ecstatic at the amount of attention his music was being given. Everyone who was anyone flocked to his website to have a listen to the guy who was the original cause of the infamous interruption and there was even a few emails being sent to him from so low end record companies. It wasn't much really but for someone who was used to their biggest audience being the remains of a drunken stag party on a night train, it was new and exciting.

"Yes." Kirstie looked up at her boyfriend from the phone he was holding. The two had decided that the next move was for Avi to become more prolific online since they figured all this backlash wouldn't have happened if people knew who he was, not just as a musician but as a person too. If they knew the real Avi, the rumours about him being an abusive menace would never have happened.

While he did agree that having somewhere to voice himself online was a good idea, he could not for the life of him wrap his head around Twitter. Kirstie had been attempting to teach him since they got on the train to head over to Scott's birthday party and so far she had only managed to learn him how to navigate the app. "Why? What's the point in that?"

"I don't know - to be precise I would presume. Maybe they wanted a gimmick?" She said with a shrug and looked up at him with a smile. For some strange reason, the train was significantly emptier than usual for a Monday evening so the two had been able to get seats for once and both of them were reeling from being close again. Since the incident, the two had been inseparable, only leaving each other's presence for work or to go meet friends.

"It's stupid." He muttered and furrowed his brow, he was preoccupied with trying to remember what she had taught him.

"Just try it." She placed her hand on his shoulder and rested her head on top of it, observing his adorable concentration face.

"Eugh fine - what should my first twitter be?" Avi reluctantly agreed and took a moment to remember how to post something. Kirstie gave him a miniature round of applause for him when he had correctly navigated himself to the correct section of the app.

"That's for you to decided - oh and it's tweet. You write a tweet." She pushed the hair from his face before turning away from him to give him space to think of what he was going say.

"Right." He nodded in recognition and began to pull his beard racking his brain for what he wanted to tweet.

The two fell into silence as Avi thought about what he wanted his first tweet to the world to be. Avi though about saying something in regards to Scott since it was his birthday party after all but he didn't want to be misread as being mean and sarcastic. He wanted to tweet about Kirstie, about how dearly he cared for her, about how beautiful she was but he could not sum his feelings up into such a little amount of words and wanted to avoid sounding like he was rubbing it in. Avi settled on tweeting about food - who doesn't love food after all, but he still had no idea what to write about his favourite subject.

Kirstie, on the other hand, was reminiscing about how wonderful the last few days had been. She often found herself deep in thought about Avi and the marvellous time the two had already had together in a number of days. If she wasn't mistaken, she thought she was falling in love with the man. All she could think about was him, all she wanted to do was be with him, she missed him whenever he left for work or she left for a show. It was like she was meant to be with him; they couldn't bear being apart. The last few nights they had spent with each other, their time together only came to a close when one of them regrettably said goodbye to the other and then they went about their day only to become one again the following night. They had been on dates, they had spent a whole night talking, they were beginning to know the other inside and out. It had been incredible, he had been incredible.

Thinking about him had made her desperate to regain his attention once more, so she turned back towards him and began to play with his hair. "I'm so glad I managed to convince you to clean your room." She said the first thing that had come to her head.

"You didn't seem to care about it when you spent practically a whole day in it." He mumbled under his breath as he typed out a tweet before changing his mind and deleting it all. Bickering was a thing for them now, it sort of came with the whole getting in really deep in a matter of days.

"I was a little preoccupied at the time to notice." She smirked, moved his hair out of the way and leant in to place a long kiss on his neck. The mention of their occasional nightly activities had made her want to repeat them and she was definitely going to make him aware of that.

"Kirst." He groaned, well aware they were in public. She evidently had forgotten that vital factor.

"Let's skip the party." Her hand looped around to the other side of his neck to pull him closer so she could get a more satisfying angle.

"We are not skipping your best friend's birthday party for that - what would the fans say when they see you are not there?" He had a point, she knew he was right but that was sure as hell not going to stop her having a little fun.

"Why can't we just be late then?" She pulled away from his neck and began to play with the lapels of the leather jacket, looking up at him hopefully.

Avi deleted some text off his phone again and mumbled a response. "I booked off work for a party not for that..."

"Oh so you think me, you and a bed is not a good enough reason to take time off?" She teased looking up at him with raised eyebrows and a grin on her face.

He sighed and finally took his eyes off of his phone and met her gaze. "I thought we agreed to slow things down on that front?"

For a couple who had only been together a week, their sex life was already more than active which had worried her. When Kirstie brought it up one night after a coffee date, Avi had reluctantly agreed that they should stop spending their nights in each other's arms. It wasn't because he hated what they were doing, naturally he was quite enjoying what they got up to but it just wasn't right. If they had continued the way they were going, their relationship would have started to become solely about sex and neither of them wanted that. They wanted to be crazy about each other for all the right reasons, not because the other was good in bed.

"Yeah, slow things down - not stop it." She pouted at him as she pulled away, thoughts running threw her head carried traces of insecurities. Was she no longer attractive to him?

After trying desperately to stick to their agreement of slowing things down, Avi finally broke down some of his pretending not to be interested defence and leant his leg against hers, placing a hand on her bare thigh. "How about a deal? I'll agree to leave earlier than planed if we can actually try to have a date and if that goes well then..."

A smile broke out on her face at the thought of the compromise and the presence of his hand on quite an intimate part of her body. 

"I'll take that! Thank you." She sang and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before leaning her head against the window of the carriage, deep in thought about navigating where they were going.

"How about this: Thank goodness for BBQ?" He grinned over at her proudly and showed her his phone.

"Perfect - it's very you." She beamed back. The train had begun to slow down and Kirstie caught a glimpse of the platform name as they approached the station. "I think it's this one."

He took her hand and followed his excited lover out of the train to go and find the nearby club Scott had rented for his birthday. Safe to say, Avi was nervous. It was the first time formally meeting Scott and Mitch, technically he had met them before but they didn't remember him. He just hoped they liked him, especially after everything Scott had done for him, Avi felt like he owed him and was eager to prove to Scott he was right when he defended him. If the worst happened and they hated him, he could always be the loser who was stuck to his girlfriend or his sister's side all night. To settle his nerves, he preoccupied himself with trying to get enough signal to send his tweet in the hopes that it would distract him from his nerves. Despite his best attempts, he couldn't stop the tightening feeling he had gotten in his stomach and some how Kirstie had detected this.

She turned in her tracks and stopped him from walking into her. "Don't worry, it will be fine. Mitch can remember you slightly and has already flirted with you so you'll win him over again in a matter of seconds. Scott will be fine with you, he'll be over protective at first but after a few drinks he will love you. I promise." She had placed her hands on his shoulders and was squeezing them reassuringly.

"What if they hate me?" He pouted down at her, he meant it as a joke but Kirstie could see through his lies.

"They won't." She rolled her eyes at him, they had had that conversations multiple times already.

"But what if they do?"

"Well time to find out, we are here." She pointed to the building she had stopped out of before taking his hand and dragging him after her into the building, not waiting for a response. The quicker she got him in, the quicker his nerves would disappear.

"Hey Kirst." Scott had spotted them as soon as they had walked into the dimly lit room. He made quick work of crossing the room with his long legs and tugged her into a bear hug. "Hey nice to meet you." He stretched out his hand to Avi in a welcoming greeting.

"Nice to meet you too." He managed to stumble out and shook his hand weakly before being distracted by an already tipsy Mitch stumbling over to them.

"Queen! You made it!" He dramatically threw his arms around her, leaning onto her a little too heavily. Noticing Avi awkwardly shifting beside her, he moved away from Kirstie and threw himself onto Avi instead, hugging him close. "Don't be nervous, I'm really, really nice."

"Mitch." Scott warned him. He was hugging Avi a little too close for all their comforts: Avi was just uncomfortable about someone coming on too strong to him; Kirstie, while she knew Mitch would never try anything with him, was a little annoyed at how close he was holding him; and Scott was just jealous that he wasn't Avi.

Taking note of the warning, he leaned back, grinned up at Avi. "Come and have a Slippery Nipple with me."

"Wha-" Avi was caught off guard by the smaller man yanking him across the the floor towards the bar. He sent a traumatised expression towards Kirstie from the thought of what Mitch was trying to talk him into doing. 

"It's a shot!" Kirstie manage to stifle her giggles and call out to her worried looking boyfriend. Great, Mitch had only been with Avi for a minute and was already planning to get him drunk.

Calming down his own giggles, Scott turned his attention back to Kirstie. "You gotta come out with us tomorrow, Mom has been begging to see you since she got here but there's only so many times it's acceptable to tell her you are busy."

Connie had been in the city for five days already and so far she had only seen her once when she came to watch the show. 

"Of course I will!"

"Are you sure he will let you out of his sight?" Scott winked. "You two have been inseparable since Wednesday. Either he is really good in bed or you are in love with him."

"Maybe it's both?" Kirstie bit her lip and stared up at her friend expectedly. She watched as he took a moment to understand what she said before his face broke out into a smile and her began bouncing slightly.

"Oh my god Kirstie, you are dating a sex God." He joked and wrapped his long arms around her. "So you think you love him? That's so exciting."

"I think I may do. I've never felt this way about someone before so if this is what being in love feels like, I am."

"Eeeek!" He squealed and pulled her closer. "From what you have told me about him, he seems like a great guy."

"He really is, just do me a favour and post a picture or something with him in. We are still doing damage control." She had already gotten Scott and Mitch to follow him on Twitter but I would be a massive help if a picture surface of the two of them together looking happy. There was only so much words could do.

"Ahh okay, Mitch and I are filming clips of the night for our web series so I'll make sure that the next time Mitch makes him take a shot that someone films it...actually on second though, maybe showing him drinking would not be the next move. Why don't we have publicists!" He threw his hands up melodramatically, making Kirstie giggle. "I'll go get a picture with him now. I think Esther is over there somewhere." He wafted his hand behind him and then ran off in the direction of the bar.

Kirstie began to waddle over in the direction Scott had gestured to and looked for Esther. Since her relationship started with Avi, there had been a slight divide between the two. It was nothing negative and certainly not anything to worry about, it was more of a 'Oh hey friend, I've just started to date your brother isn't this awkward' divide. 

"Hi!" Esther called out from behind her, immediately stumbled towards her. From what she could gather, Esther must have been one of Mitch's last victims. She wasn't drunk, it was way too early in the night for anyone to be that far gone but Mitch had clearly gotten her onto the good stuff already. 

Kirstie laughed at the lack of control she appeared to have of her limbs, happy that Esther was excited to see her again, things were finally beginning to return back to normal between the two. However, as soon as Esther heard the beginning of some indie song she loved, she was already on the dance floor before Kirstie could resister what had happened.

Eventually, after going to the bar herself and getting a drink (Avi and Mitch were nowhere in sight) Kirstie made her way over to a corner of the room which was filled with the her cast mates and settled in there for a while. It was nice to talked to them outside of the show, she only ever hung out with Scott afterwards so it was a great experience to get to know them not in a professional environment. Later, when an hour of worrying about the trouble Mitch could be causing Avi was over, she finally found him again when he wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"I missed you." He sang into her neck, obviously being subjected to Mitch's ability to corrupt with alcohol ran in the family. He was far from being drunk but he definitely wasn't sober, she could smell it on his breath. Yet he was still acting and speaking somewhat normal (albeit with a little more confidence) so she doubted he had drunk much.

"Smile!" They were interrupted by Scott pushing their camera into their faces to which they both obliged being quickly joined for another one by Mitch (who unsurprisingly positioned himself behind Avi) and then Scott had managed to convince someone to take a picture of the four of them together.

When the impromptu photoshoot had finished, Kirstie began to move him towards the edge of the room near the door. It was time to get out of there before Mitch could get Avi back on board his drunken schemes. "Wanna go for our date now?"

"Sure - should we say goodbye first?" He gestured over to the terrible twosome who were currently belting out the lyrics to a different song from what was playing on the dance floor

She brushed him off with a nonchalant hand movement. "Nah, they wont notice, they will be gone to the fairies by now. I'll send a text later."

"So, where are you taking me?" He questioned as ordered his jacket out of the cloakroom that she could not remember him putting in there - it must have been during his adventures with Mitch. When the girl tending it returned, he wrapped it around her as she had forgotten once again when she was getting ready that New York got cold at night.

"Someplace special obviously, it's our week-iversary after all!" She giggled and began to strut in front of him, ensuring with her hand in his that he was close behind.


	14. I Can't Help Falling In Love With You

"How fitting." He smirked as they made their way back up to the roof of her apartment building. Avi had figured out where she was taking him the moment she had picked up a blanket from her apartment. The trip to the apartment could have been for anything really, maybe she needed a change of clothes for where they were going but the moment she pulled out an all too familiar blanket he knew, she wanted to repeat that night.

"I know right?" She answered back at him. The week-iversary thing had been a joke at first but somehow it was beginning to have some significance to them, mainly due to how surreal it all was. Just a week ago, she had come and found him on the train and now they were acting like they had known each other for years. Love truly was unusual.

"I hope you don't bring me up here every Monday, I think I could possibly get frost bite one day." He quipped when she came to a halt at the edge of the roof.

"Now that would be a good date." She stuck her tongue out at him and laid a blanket down on the floor. It was a little windy up there so she had strategically decided to put the blanket by a wall in the direction it was coming to block them from it.

"We are missing the wine, and my guitar. I can't sing to you now." Avi joked and sat down with his back against the wall and playfully tugged on her sleeve of her dress until she came and joined him.

The blanket soon covered them both nicely as she sat down between his legs and leant against his chest. She was engulfed by his arms soon after she had gotten comfortable and she sighed in contentment. He was always so warm and cozy, even without a jacket as she was still wearing his.

"I'm sure we can manage." She muttered quietly, not wishing to break the comforting atmosphere with being too loud. "What did you and Mitch get up to anyway?"

"He was trying to introduce me to twerking and voguing. He was making innuendos the entire time." Kirstie immediately wished she was there. Who wouldn't want to see Avi try and twerk? It would have been monumental!

She knew Mitch could be a handful, it was why she loved him but she was sure she couldn't make it through a long period of time with drunk Mitch without wanting to murder him. "Typical. Thanks for staying with him, it was really nice of you to make an effort with my friends."

Avi tightened his grip on her in appreciation of the recognition of what he did for her. Mitch was starting to get a little annoying after an hour, he did like the guy - he was hilarious and sassy in all the right ways, but he was sure he would like him a lot more when he wasn't constantly wanting to take shots. "I pretty sure I was enjoying it just as he was. He is a really awesome guy."

"He loves you." She laughed and curled into him more, it was rather cold out in the New York wind.

"He loves my beard - and my voice." He ended the sentence with lowering his voice as low as he could. Kirstie knew she would never get tired of feeling the result of the low octave on her body, it reminded her how talent he was from years of training, and also how incredibly sexy he could be.

"Who doesn't?" She hummed and leant back her head against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. She knew that she could vary easily fall asleep there in his arms, he was just so comforting.

"Kirstie." His voice broke through the silence.

"Hmmm." She was dozing a little in his arms, looking adorable. He knew he had to do it now, it was the perfect moment, she just looked so at peace.

He placed a kiss against her forehead just incase it would be his last. "I've got something crazy to tell you."

"Go on." She muttered sleepily, obviously not aware of what was to come.

"I think... I think I may be falling in love with you." Avi had no idea how on earth he managed to get it out. He had been thinking about telling her all day but every time he had, he got that awful nervous pain in his stomach and reason screamed at him it was not a good idea, it would only scare her away.

That made her snap out of her lethargic mindset and she turned around to face him, taking the blanket with her. She couldn't put into words what was going through her mind.

"I know it's crazy, and only fools rush in but I can't help -" He took a deep intake of breath before continuing. His hands had made their way around hers and he was giving her a reassuring rub as he stared into her eyes, watching her reaction. "I can't help the way I feel about you."

Tears had begun to well up in her eyes from the overwhelming nature of the conversation but she was determined no to let them fall, she didn't want to turn into a blubbering mess and embarrass herself.

He took the fact she wasn't running away and screaming at him as his cue to continue. "Whenever I see you, it feels like my heart is in my throat and...and I never know what to say or do when I'm around you, you literally blow my mind. If this is what love feels like then I hope to God I never stop feeling it, it's wonderful. It's so amazing how one minute you were just a stranger and now you are my whole life, I never want this to end."

As his speech drew to a close, Kirstie could only stare at him, cherishing every word he had just spoken. It was such a relief to know than he was thinking the exact same thing as her, she would have hated to be the only one falling too fast and too hard, it would have just made her look needy and pathetic.

Finally regaining control of her body, she squeezed the hands which were holding hers. "I think I love you too." She stated it with confidence, trying her hardest to convey in just a short sentence how much emotion behind it. She loved how his smile would help her through any crisis; she loved how he bickered with his sister over the most menial of things; she loved how he could make her stomach flutter with just on look. If this was love, she only knew it because of him.

"I think I fell for you the moment you set foot on that train last week."

That was all it took for her to join her lips with his. He had reached up to place a hand in her hair, pulling her closer while she just sat there, leaning in, basking in the feeling of their lips together and her hand in his. It wasn't the staggering kiss they were expecting, Kirstie had thought the moment she had told him she loved him it would have been hot and passionate but this version was so much better than anything she could have imagined. It was sweet, gentle and full love, conveying to the other just how much they meant to them.

She didn't realise until he had pulled away from her that sometime during their kiss (or it could have been when he told her he may be in love with her, Kirstie wasn't sure) he had begun to cry. Seeing Avi cry was a new experience to her and she immediately yearned to comfort him even though she was aware these were not bad tears. It almost made the tears fall from her eyes too but she held them back, when she cried, her whole body and mind shut down and she knew that instead of being a wreck, she wanted to remember this moment.

"I didn't have to sing for you to kiss me this time." His joke was weary with the overwhelming emotions of the situation and his hand brushed against her cheek as he looked down at her like she was the most precious thing in the world.

She brought her hands up to his face and wiped away the tears that remained there. "You have already won me over tonight." She murmured.

His hand came up to meet her wrist on his cheek and he turned his head to kiss her palm. "You're amazing, you know that?"

"You're pretty darn fine yourself." She smirked and pulled him in for one last peck.

Avi opened up his arms for her to crawl into and she settled herself on his lap, ensuring that the blanket was once again covering both of them. Her hands found their way around his neck and she rested her forehead onto his shoulder. She would have loved to stay in that moment forever. It was crazy how too complete strangers could fall in love in a week, but it had happened, and they had fallen hard. The connection she felt to him was magical. She felt like she wanted to tell him all her darkest secrets and act stupid with him afterwards, she wanted to sleep with him and then wake up to his light snores the next morning, she wanted to hold his hand and scream from the mountaintop that he was hers, that he loved her. She just wanted to be with him forever.

Being with him made everything better, he had touched her soul in a matter of days and she never wanted to let him go.


	15. Come What May (Te Amare)

September moved into October in a flurry of dates, heated nights and a surprisingly small amount of busking for Avi. Since the whole relationship ordeal, he had been earning money left right and centre from all the attention his website was getting, he was even called to do a special performance with some of his old opera major friends (most of whom had already started successful careers in Opera) at a charity gala. He agreed to it in a heartbeat, dying to get back on the stage and show the world that he was more than just a one trick pony. May be that would stop the haters? 

Getting social media had spilt Kirstie's fans in to two sides. There was a large group of them who had either supported the two of them from the beginning or had been converted by seeing he was a normal guy from his tweets, and the support Scott, Kirstie, and Mitch gave him; they were all very nice and encouraging. For that group, the couple were seen as 'cute', 'adorable' and 'meant for each other' and they would become excited at every post the two made together. However, there was a very small but vocal group on the opposite side who had reacted badly to him putting himself out there.

'Avi is only in it for the money', 'Kirstie's new boyfriend looks like a tool, no wonder she is too scared to leave that relationship' and '#Pray4Kirstie' were just some of the tweets he found on a daily basis. It irked him, and they hurt deeply. He knew what he was getting into when he had told her he loved her on the rooftop just a few weeks previously, but that did not prepare him for how hurtful the comments would be. They were starting to get to him - he knew it, she knew it. Avi had no idea how Kirstie had handled being subjected to that for so long but it only made him respect her more, she was the strongest person he knew.

"Stop reading them." Kevin reminded him and Avi quickly pull down his phone, embarrassed that his best friend had caught him once more. "You need to stop searching for them, you are just making things worse by reading them Avi."

"Yeah I know, it's just hard not to seek them out when you know they are there." He sighed reluctantly and continue to destroy the plate of bacon and eggs he had in front of him. 

Avi had called Kevin for an Annie's breakfast just like old times in celebration of Kevin's birthday, he was happy to be finally spending some quality time with his best friend and hoped that seeing Kevin and hearing his hyena laugh would pick him up a little. The comments had really been getting him down recently. It was like he was backed into a corner while people poked sticks at him constantly and he wasn't able to do anything about it.

Kevin wafted his fork through the air and spoke through a mouth full of eggs. "She seem's worth it though."

"She really is." Avi said slowly, nodding his head on every word. It was true, Kirstie was totally worth all the shit he was going through. It was hard hearing what people had to say about him but he struggled through it for her, to see her smile when he met her on the train every night just like tradition, to watch her adorably laugh at Mitch's jokes. She was worth every single negative word.

The cellist grinned when he was his partner in crime was lost in thought with a slight smile on his face. "Sooo when will I be meeting the girl who stole you away from me?" He teased and watched as Avi began to blush.

Avi purposely hesitated as he spoke, knowing what Kevin's reaction would be. "She'll be at the gala tonight." 

Kirstie was ecstatic when she found out he'd been asked to perform with his old group, she had begged to be his date so that she could get to see him sing classically for the first time. Avi knew that she could have probably gotten an invite anyway just for being her but he took it as a compliment that she wanted to go there with him and not as two separate guests. Mitch had even taken him out shopping for a tux which he had paid for despite Avi's protests - he would pay him back at some point and wouldn't rest until he did, it had been expensive.

Kevin looked overjoyed and pointed his fork over at Avi to jokingly threaten him. "You better introduce us."

"You know I will." Avi held up his hands in surrender.

"Are you guys all ready? All rehearsed?" Kevin asked as Avi watched him eat, he had already finished all of his.

"Yep." 

It had been fun meeting up with the guys again, it had reminded Avi of old times at college when he was carefree and life appeared to be an easy ride. It had been awkward at first as the others had brought up him and Kirstie but once they had got over the initial anecdote of their whole relationship, things had been great. They sounded good, all of them, and they still had that old chemistry that made them so successful in the first place.

"Oh man, I'm so excited to hear you sing again." Kevin had been a big supporter of Avi and the group from the very beginning, in fact they had become friends when Kevin had stumbled into their rehearsals one day. Not being a singer, he had thought what they did was amazing and Avi thought his mastering of the Cello was phenomenal, their relationship started based on awe of each other's talents.

"I can't wait, it's going to be completely epic." Avi said with a massive grin on his face, he was so excited, he loved performing.

He found himself hours later stood in front of some fancy hotel that he doubted he would never be able to afford a night there without emptying his bank account (and that's with all his extra money). Kirstie was standing in front of him, straightening his bowtie as they waited for Kevin. She looked stunning, to Avi she always looked beautiful but there was something about the lacy short dress she was wearing that made her look ravishing. He couldn't believe that a girl that wonderful was his date to an event let alone his girlfriend, it was like all his wildest dreams had came true.

After she was done finishing his bowtie, she looked up at him with a small smile. "You ready, babe?"

"As I'll ever be." He huffed. To say he was nervous didn't cover it, he wanted to run out of the line to get in and scream all the way back to his apartment. If this was the Regency Era, this event would be the equivalent of him coming out to court. It was his moment to showcase his talent and to be know as something other than 'That Broadway Singer's Boyfriend', and that pressure was scary.

"You'll do brilliantly, I know you will." She pulled him in for a quick kiss, weary that they were standing alongside some of Manhattan's elite, they don't need to get the reputation of being that couple who couldn't keep their hands off of each other.

"So this is Kirstie." Kevin was known for his perfect timing and had somehow managed to sneak up to them mid-kiss. The two awkwardly pulled apart as Avi put his arm around her.

"Yeah this is Kirstie, Kirst this is Kevin." Avi performed the awkward introduction and afterwards Kevin pulled Kirstie into a hug.

"It's so nice to put a face to a name!"

"Happy Birthday!" Kirstie announced cheerily when the two pulled apart. 

Since Kevin was finally there to keep her company, Avi took the opportunity to leave his girlfriend to go get ready. He waited around a few minutes before he left to ensure that things were not uncomfortable between his two best friends but within a matter of seconds they were already discussing things about him like he was not there. Kissing Kirstie goodbye at the right time to stop her divulging Kevin with something embarrassing, he walked into the venue, nervous about the upcoming performance.

A couple of hours later, Avi had finally rejoined the two on the dance floor. He was hastily downing his first whiskey of the night in celebration of a job well done. The performance was smooth, everyone loved it and everyone cheered. Back stage, there were even talks of doing it again sometime which they all agreed to. Avi loved that he was now considered important enough to be back in the loop with his old classmates, it meant he was making it, even if it was on behalf of being in a relationship with Kirstie.

"Aviiii, you did so well!" Kirstie had threw himself at him as soon as she had caught sight of him near. Kevin laughed in the background as he watched his best friend be surprised by the small women.

"Thanks." It came out all muffled due to the grip she had on him. 

Kevin had been with her all night after she had asked him to stay with her, originally he had planed to leave as soon as she had found somebody else to go hang out with some of the philharmonic members to try and network but as soon as he had seen the smarmy Chase circling around her. Chase Fitzhaven had a reputation for being a bit of an ass, and a mean one at that. Kirstie had warned Kevin about Chase's infatuation with her, they had a past which she had chosen to avoid at all cost (she had even forgone telling Avi) but as she had grown more famous, Chase was, well, back on the chase. So far that night, he had only throw a few glances her way, probably due to the fact Kevin was watching over her like a guard dog.

"Dude, amazing - just amazing." Kevin threw up his hands to show that he couldn't handle how good it was.

Kirstie practically bounce in excitement at her returning boyfriend. "What language was that?"

"Spanish - why did you like it?" Avi flirted and was finally able to free his arms from between them and wrap them around his girlfriend.

"Yes." She practically purred up at him and pulled him in for a little too sensual for public kiss.

Kevin coughed to remind them of his presents only a meter away from them. "Jeez, guys. Still here."

Kirstie turned in his arms while Avi muttered an apology, and face him with a smile on her face. "Thanks for staying with me Kev, I'm good now if you wanna leave?"

Kevin wouldn't have minded leaving, as much as he wanted to stay and compliment Avi, he had other things he had put on hold to protect Kirstie from the pretentious rich guy. "Actually, there is this really talented violinist I've been wanting to talk to, I'll catch you guys later, okay?"

"Sure." Avi waved him off (they would probably talk later anyway) and twisted his girlfriend round to face him. "I've missed you."

"I missed you too." She peered up at Avi as she began to play with the embodied lining of his jacket. "Seriously though, you were so good. I knew you were talented, but damn, I never knew you were that talented."

He smiled sheepishly at her, he never was very good with compliments. 

"My guy is full of surprises." She whispered seductively and pulled him back down for a kiss but stopped just before his lips met hers. Instead, she pulled away and smirked at him, spinning out of his arms and led him out of the room and into a hallway. Kirstie pull him to an empty room at the end of the corridor, which Avi presumed would be full of life in the daytime, and as soon as he had closed the door behind him, she had pulled him too her, kissing him feverishly.

"I never though Spanish would - umm - turn me - mhm - on." She managed to stumble out through hot kisses. He had backed her up until she was leaning against a table and began to kiss her neck. Her hands immediately found their way into his hair, gripping it to move him to a better angle for both of them. 

"I'll keep that in mind." he mumbled into her neck as his hands began to stoke their way up her exposed thighs, eventually reach their place under her dress. The contact of his hands on her legs and the pressures from the kisses on her neck caused her to moan loudly and that was followed by a giggle. She couldn't believe they were doing this when someone could very easily walk in on them but the thought of getting caught was fun, exhilarating and added to the heat of the moment.

She pulled him back up to her lips, relieved for them to be back there and slipped her tongue into his mouth which was met by a hefty groan from him. Her hands fell from his hair to work on his bowtie which she skilfully managed to undo blindly and not much longer than it would have usually taken her. His hands began to slip under the band of her panties which made her shiver in anticipation. She responded by frantically undoing the top few of his buttons and slipping her hands in to meet his chest.

"Well, fancy seeing you here." The voice echoed through the room, forcing the two apart. Kirstie quickly found the source of the voice in the darkened room and groan in annoyance when she saw Chase leaning against the door looking proud like a mouse that had skilfully gotten his cheese. 

Great, just fucking great.


	16. Demons

"Chase, what are you doing here?" Kirstie said hastily as she manoeuvred herself away from being pushed up against the table and pulled down her dress. Avi was quickly redoing his half open shirt hovering nervously behind her, unsure at what was going on. Was this guy a threat or a friend? He had no clue.

Chase smirked over at the two looking almost as obnoxious as the full white suit he was wearing. "Just checking up of you and your new tramp of a boyfriend." Definitely a threat.

"We're fine, now please leave." Kirstie forced out through clenched teeth. She hated Chase with a passion, there was a reason she no longer wanted to be associated with him.

"You know having sex in a public place is illegal?" He stated dryly.

She could sense Avi moving closer to her, probably in case he felt the need to pull her behind him in a matter of moments. "I pretty sure you have put us off for the next century." Kirstie spat out bitterly, she really hated him and Avi was slowly beginning to sense that.

"Well I'm glad to hear that, I just love being able to help the welfare of the public." He feigned an genuine tone that they could all see through.

Kirstie crossed her arms across her chest and attempted to stare him down. "What are you still doing here?"

"I just wanted to know why you chose this loser when you could have had me. I heard he was homeless until you took pity on him." Both Kirstie and Avi wanted to punch that smug look of his face but only Avi seemed willing to go through with it. He pulled Kirstie behind him a little rougher that his usual way of handling her and stared furiously at the disrespectful intruder with clenched fists.

"Woah there tiger, don't want you to ruin that suit. It looks too expensive for you to replace." Kirstie knew this would hit Avi's insecurities bad and grimaced when she saw him suddenly stand up straighter.

"Leave. Now." Avi spoke for the first time since Chase had entered the room. It made Kirstie shiver at how menacing it sounded, it was lower than usual and sounded more like a growl that words. She hated it, it scared her to think about what trouble he could cause if he was that angry. She wasn't scared of him though - she was certain he would never lash out his anger on her, she was more scared at the thought of what he could be capable of.

"Or what?" Even though she no longer had a good view of the scene since Avi had blocked her, she could imagine the satisfied smirk that was probably decorating Chase's face. He had gotten the rise out of him he was after and there was no doubt that he would be proud of his accomplishment for days to come.

"You don't want to know." There was that voice again that Kirstie hated. She lightly placed her palm in-between his shoulder blades in an attempt to comfort him but he only relax slightly.

"Ohh I can see why people think he's abusive now." Chase nonchalantly spoke and leaned to the side to get a good view of Kirstie and talk to her. "Top tip: don't aim for her face - that's your money maker there." He pointed at Avi as he spoke like he was some kind of master giving a student a lesson. Avi tensed up even more than he was before and Kirstie knew his composure was going to crumble any second.

Kirstie grabbed his arm tight before he could make a move. "Come on Avi. Let's leave this ass to wallow in his own filth. We are not sinking to his level."

Sick of taking the damsel in distress role, she hastily took control of the situation and roughly began to pull Avi out of the room. Chase had began to chuckle slightly under his breath at the reaction he got out of Avi which caused Kirstie to throw him a glare. She knew he was harmless, all his punches came out of his mouth but that didn't stop her from feeling the need to threaten him to not attack them. Avi resisted at first but Kirstie's forceful tugs eventually made him give in to her intentions. She pulled him hurriedly out of the room and all the way out of the building before he sharply pulled out his arm from her grip.

"What was that? I could have handled him!" Avi raised his voice at her but she was thankful to hear it was nowhere near the intensity it was back in the room with Chase.

She was terrified to turn around and see his expression of anger at her, it would have pained her to see it. Instead she kept walking so if they were going to have this out, they wouldn't be doing it in front of a building filled with the most respected people in New York.

"And then he will confirm all those rumours about how you are a little too friendly with your fists." She mumbled, desperately trying to keep her anger in.

"So? Whatever happened to all you care about is us, not the fans?" Avi heatedly replied. He was taking his anger out on her, she knew that, but that didn't stop her from wanting to return the anger at him.

The overwhelming feelings of anger and sadness caused her eyes to well up, she couldn't believe that they had been reduced to arguing. "Since it was a lot more than I can handle! Now calm down Avi, you're rilled up." She tried to diffuse this situation but her sentence came out too harsh to have it's desired effect.

"Why shouldn't I be? Some snotty guy has just insulted us and my girlfriend failed to warn me about him." His voiced raised even more and passersby were begging to notice them.

That made her snap. She stopped before she descended down to the station and spat at him harshly, "I don't have to tell you everything about me you know."

"We're together, it kinda comes with the package deal." He threw his hands up in the air, his voice still loud and irritated.

"Whatever Avi... I promise I'll tell you when we get home once we've both calmed down." She turned away to climb down to the station, she was completely done with the conversation knowing that if they continued the way they were, they were bound to do something they will regret.

"Why can't you just tell me now?" He was still fuming as he ran down the stairs behind her but the volume of his voice had dropped significantly.

"Because I don't want to talk about this in public." She retorted back, not wanting to look as him and waited for the next train.

"Fine." He muttered under his breath indignantly.

While the couple were used to awkward trips back to her apartment, the trip that night was so awkward it was worse that all the other trips combined. There was a deadly silence between the two which was uncomfortable to deal with, neither of them enjoying what one naysayer could do to their relationship. The train was crowed so the two had to stand closer than they would have wished, sharing the same pole to hold on to. The atmosphere between them was filled with unfulfilled adrenaline and anger but both of them were certain they weren't enraged at the other, they were just in a shitty situation and had chosen each other as their metaphorical punching bags. The tension between the two was alleviated almost completely when Avi sighed defeatedly behind her and leaned his forehead against the back of her shoulder in an apology. Kirstie responded by finally letting the tears she had been holding in fall and moved her hand on the pole to graze over his. Instead of fury lingering between the two, it was now a deep, guilty sadness of what the two had become. They were disappointed in their selves and the other, they were angry at how badly they handled the situation, they were upset that something could get that reaction out of them.

The walked slowly back to her apartment, Kirstie once again in front of Avi so as to not see his deflated body language, it had troubled her enough to catch his miserable expression when she had got off the train. She made quick work of letting them into her building and hastily made her way over to the stairs, opting against a painful elevator ride. He was lagging behind but she was not in the mood to wait for him and continued to hurry up the stairs to her floor.

She was greeted by an excited Toto yelping and pawing at her legs as soon as she opened the door but that yelping slowly turned into silence when he sensed that something was up with his owner. He followed her into her bedroom (careful to avoid the heels she had kicked off and sent flying across the room) as she begun to take down her hair and remove her make up. When Toto heard the door open once more, he anxiously ran back towards it, knowing who it must be. Avi was more responsive than Kirstie when it came to greeting her dog, he bent down and began to pet it as he heard his girlfriend moving around in the next room.

He was scared to face her again. He had made a huge mistake when he had begun to argue with her, it was wrong of him, mean even. His guilt was already being to eat him up inside despite him only having less than an hour to dwell on his actions. He had been an ass, as much as an ass as that Chase guy, and he wouldn't be surprised if she came out of her room and kicked him out of her apartment and her life.

Kirstie walked out of her room, rubbing her face with a make up wipe and already dressed in her pyjamas. Toto scurried over to her but she continued to walk over to the couch not in the mood to give him all her attention, they could snuggle later. Avi stood up from his position by the door, remove his shoes and nervously shuffled towards the couch, expecting the worst. He perched at the edge of the seat, careful to avoid moving too close to her or making eye contact.

After a moment, she scrunched up her make up wipe and placed it on her coffee table to dispose of later and slid towards him. His body was stiff as she pushed him against the back of the couch and clambered onto his lap, pulling his face to look at her. His arms failed to wrap themselves around her like they would usually, instead he just sat there staring at her. He wanted to cry but the adrenaline and rage left over in his body was preventing it, he couldn't believe he had treated her like that.

She sighed and placed her hands on his shoulders, she guessed he deserved an explanation. "When I first moved here, I was lonely and scared but then I met Chase one day. He seemed kind and he was rich and a somebody in the city and I just went along with it because I was so desperate. I soon realised it was a mistake and broke things off with him which he seemed fine with at the time but then I started to get famous and he's been wanting me back ever since."

His hands shifted slightly so they were on her but not encircling her. He had been scared to touch her at first, once he had gone over fully what had happened, he was sure she would never let him touch her again but she didn't shy away, in fact she had come to him. "Why didn't you tell me? I could have handled it." He tried to talk as softly as possible, well aware of how low and gruff his voice became as a result of being angry.

"Because when I met you, you were perfect - you are perfect, I didn't want to bring all my past bad baggage in to ruin this so I just kept it quiet and hoped he would stay away." Her words softened his body slightly and he became less tense and stiff. Kirstie took this as the perfect opportunity to wrap her arms around him fully and pressed her face into his shoulder.

His hands only moved around her a little more, he was still weary that she may want to leave. "Has he tried at all since we've been together?" He hope the answer was no, he would hate himself even more if he found out that while he had been with her that bastard had been creeping her out without him knowing.

She shook her head and leant back so she could take in his worried expression. "No - I would have told you as soon as he did. I didn't know he would be there tonight - well, I could have guessed he would but I was so excited that I just forgot to think. You have to believe me, if I had known, I would have told you straight away."

"It's fine, I do." His eyes searched her face, hoping for some clue what was going through her brain. Avi could tell by the way she was staring at him that her love for him was not lost that night. He could infer from the gentle expression on her face that she was beginning to forgive him but there was something about the puffiness of her eyes that made his heart ache.

"I made you cry...I'm sorry, Kirst." He finally wrapped his arms fully around her once he had seen what he had done to her. She wasn't crying at that moment but he could tell by the redness of her eyes that she had been not long ago, and it had been forceful tears.

She relaxed in his arms, content that he was now returning to his usual loving self. "I'm sorry too." She mumbled.

He broke eye contact suddenly and moved his face down, closing his eyes. "You have nothing to be sorry for, I was the d-"

Her hand reached up to his face and pulled him back up, interrupting him. "No Avi, forget it. I know you well enough to understand how sorry you are... and I was a bitch back, don't deny it. Chase just got to our heads that's all." There was a soothing tone to her voice as she stroked his cheek until he began to look at her again.

He peered up at her finally with guilty eyes. "I hope I never speak to you like that again." His voice was solemn and full of conviction. Kirstie believed she could actually feel how sorry he was from the sound of his voice.

"As long as you don't speak to me like you did to Chase, I don't mind." She forced a smirk onto her face in an attempt to lighten the mood which it did slightly despite the fact they both knew what she had said was the truth and not a joke.

"I'm so sorry." He mumbled and squeezed her tighter, not wanting to let her go.

"Stop apologising and go make me some hot cocoa." The smile this time was genuine, she wanted to leave the conversation at that and return to her usual upbeat self - there had been enough sadness that night.

He smiled sadly at her and kissed her lightly for the first time after the whole argument. Avi pushed her off his lap and slowly padded to the kitchen as Kirstie watched him, she could tell how much he hated himself right then and it made her want to pull him into her arms and hug him until he felt better.

Toto realised that something had changed between the two and approached his owner hoping for attention and she gave it to him finally. She scooped him up and cuddled him as she turned on the TV and began to look for something to watch. Toto began to lick her face, happy that she was finally showing him some love. Usually she would have pushed him off but she was too exhausted from holding back, and then finally releasing, tears to care. She settled on a rerun of Modern Family and waited for Avi to return.

Just minutes later he came back with two steaming mugs in hand and placed them down onto the table. He settled down next to her and pulled the blanket that was decorating the top of the couch down and over all three of them. Kirstie and Toto quickly snuggled into his warmth and he welcomed them with open arms, pleased that she was willing to show him such love despite his disgusting behaviour earlier on.

Even though the two had sorted things out after their scrap, there was an ominous feeling lingering in the air that some pompous guy in a white suit was going to be the least of their worries.


	17. Push Your Head Towards The Air

Since the run in with Chase, things hadn't been as smooth as usual between the couple. He was the straw that broke the camel's back, the encounter with him had opened the floodgates that they had built together and now all the problems came seeping through. They hadn't fought anymore which Kirstie knew was a good sign but every single negative comment was beginning to get to each of them. It effected their moods, it effected their relationship. The honeymoon period was well and truly over and the two had been knocked back into reality and forced to face all the problems that they had created for themselves.

Chase was off the scene for a few days after the incident but then he resurfaced when they started to hear rumours about how Kirstie had cheated on Avi at the gala with him, they just knew he was the cause. Obviously the people who already hated the two of them together latched onto the rumour, they wanted another excuse to hate Avi and turn Kirstie into a victim and the rumour was a perfect excuse for them to do so. It wasn't long before the story turned into a long blow out affair and that the chivalrous Chase was helping Kirstie to escape an abusive relationship. Despite the fact the tension between the two of them had increased since their first argument, the two had agreed to break their unofficial and not very strict rule to not explain their relationship. Kirstie had appeared on a Q&A episode of Scott and Mitch's new web show and Scott had made sure to select a question aimed at Kirstie's relationship. It hadn't stopped the fans from speculating and bashing on Avi but it had stopped that rumour dead in it's tracks, especially because Scott and Mitch had agreed with everything she had said.

A few days after she had filmed the video, she was scrolling through her tagged photos on Instagram to get a feeling of how people were reacting to the video. She knew better than to seek out comments about her relationship but she just wanted to find one nice comment to show to Avi to cheer him up. It had been really getting to him - he had started to want to cut their dates short, and even when he was with her he was distant, lost in though. Their sex life had dramatically decreased, they were no longer in the mood for it but when they were it was rougher than usual, being more for their own gratification and less because of their feelings for the other. The feelings were still there though, they never disappeared but instead they had been masked by a million other thoughts and problems that they needed to deal with. Once they had been removed (which they were working on doing) they could return to how they were at the beginning, all happy and overwhelmingly in love.

The pictures she saw and the comments were mixed, many of them were condemning the others who had spread the rumours while others admitted they were wrong but was adamant there was something shady about Avi. When she found a particularly nice one, she would show it to her boyfriend who was in bed next to her and enjoyed the fact seeing them would make him smile. Occasionally, one post would mention this one account and told their followers to go and check it out of they didn't believe Avi was an awful person. Kirstie didn't take much notice at first but then the same account kept on being mentioned and mentioned, especially when she got back to before her appearance of Superfruit. She knew she shouldn't have pressed the link to the profile, it was bound to be filled negative slander, but when the profile was loaded up, she was shocked to see what she found there.

She was expecting to see screenshots of their tweets with a comment remarking what they had said or repostings of the pictures they had together complete with a message about how awkward they thought they looked together. It was what she was used to, it was what people had been posting for the last month they had been together so she was horrified to find what was really there. She wanted to show Avi straight away, reason told her she should but she couldn't bring herself to do it. They were finally beginning to get out of the rut they were in and showing him that would only make him spiral back into it.

The first picture she saw was a photo that she had taken of Esther goofing around with a fake stage cigarette and the user had commented 'Drugs must run in the family, hope Avi isn't forcing Kirstie to smoke too.'

"What the actual fuck?" The words slipped out of her mouth before she could stop them and Avi was alerted to her disgust.

"What?" He groaned and placed his face further into the pillow, he had a good idea of what was about to come.

She knew brushing him off would not work but that didn't stop her from trying. "Nothing."

"Kirst, just tell me." He extended his arm to pull her closer and left it wrapped around her hips so she couldn't pull away.

"You won't like it." Moving closer to him, she angled the phone so he wouldn't be able to see what was on her screen.

He sighed. "I never like anything these days." It was true, he didn't. Her so called fans had sucked the life out of him like a dementor.

She turned her phone around so he could see it if he chose to look up. "It's just this account, it's sort of... dedicated to hating on you."

"Oh."

Kirstie scrolled to the next picture while Avi shifted to watch over her shoulder and once again she was annoyed at what she saw. It must have been a companion piece to the previous picture and was a picture of Avi and some of his old college friends drinking on a night out with a caption alluding to him being a drunk. It was a private photo, she knew that it was from his personal Facebook account, she had spent many moments when she was missing him scrolling through his pictures, she knew it was there.

The next picture was by far the worst of the bunch slander-wise. It was a picture of Avi and his mom that he had posted on twitter and the caption read 'You can tell from the look in her eye's she's ashamed of who she raised. But as they say, the apple never falls far from the tree...'

"They are utter trash." Kirstie muttered bitterly and glanced at Avi apprehensively, knowing what she would find. The murderous look that she had only ever seen when he was threatening Chase was currently decorating his face. No one messed with his mom. Seeing his reaction was all she needed to make her screenshot it and post something of her own. She slated them for it, not caring that she was dragging them through the mud, they deserved it. What kind of person could post something like that and manage to sleep at night?

"Don't." His voice came out like he was unsure himself at what he was saying. His arm moved from its place on her hips to push the phone out of her line of vision.

Kirstie had kept hold of her phone but gazed at him. "No Avi, they deserve some humiliation."

"You will just be putting fuel on the fire." He warned as moved his hands off of her and into the air in defeat.

A flash of doubt came into her mind but she was used to it by now, it was a common thought of hers. She couldn't understand how Avi could give up on battling the naysayers so easily, it worried her how much the encounter with Chase had changed him. It had changed her too but for her, it had only spurred her on, she was now more determined than ever. "Do you not want to fight for us anymore?" She managed to ask weakly, she needed to know if he was ready to give up on them.

"I don't want to fight for anything, things will calm down, we just need to power through and ignore them." His answer wasn't the one she was dreading but it didn't calm her worries.

However, she needed to post something for her own sanity. She needed to let people know that she could see what they were saying and that it hurt."Well at least let me make an example of them, I won't say much."

"Fine but that's it, all this has got to stop." He mumbled and placed his arm back around her in defeat.

Kirstie quickly typed out a short comment which would get her message across, posted it and placed her phone back onto her nightstand so she could turn her attention back to her drowsy boyfriend. He had closed his eyes once more to go back to sleep and even though he was attempting to rest, he had a pained expression on his face which suggested he was far from being at peace. She reached out her hand to begin playing with his hair and he moved his head for her to get a better angle.

"Avi." She whispered, determined to talk about what was going through his head. Relationships were built on communication so she knew that whatever was bothering him needed to be discussed.

"I don't want to talk about it." He grumbled.

"Avi please." Her hand stopped its stroking of his hair as she looked down at him pleadingly.

"No Kirst - I need to go to work." He pushed her hand off his head and sat up. The clothes that she had pulled off him which littered the room were hastily collected up by him and he began to pull them back on.

"You don't start for another two hours." She watched him sorrowfully as he jumped into his skinny jeans and tied his belt. He'd been doing that a lot lately, just walking out whenever she wanted to talk about feelings.

"Well maybe I put myself down for an earlier shift." He grunted back, he was also angry all the time too.

"Come and meet me on the train?" She sat up, held the sheet to her chest and stared at him hopefully. The grimace on his face softened under the look.

Avi glanced at her dejectedly as he pulled on his shirt. "Fine."

With that, he had left her room. She knew she was slowly loosing him, he had never been able to handle her fame and she doubt he ever would from the way he was acting now. He was like a fish out of water in her world of glitz and show tunes, her life made him uncomfortable because he felt like he never belonged there and vice versa. They were just two people from completely different worlds but that didn't stop her from wanting to fight desperately to keep him in her life.


	18. Gravity

To Scott & Mitch: Anyone free right now? Need to talk.

It was only a matter of seconds before she got a reply.

Mitch: Coming down now.

Kirstie needed advice, she had no clue what to do with Avi. She wanted to help him, she wanted him to stop feeling so depressed all the time but she couldn't wrap her head around what he must be thinking, she was too used to being in the limelight to remember how it was at the beginning. She was desperate not to loose him, he had brought so much joy and love into her life in a matter of weeks that she didn't even want to consider what her life could be like without him. She should have really gone to Esther since she would have the best advice considering she had known him for all of his life but there was something about talking to his sister (and his roommate) behind his back which made her feel guilty.

After Avi had left, she had left her bed also and got dressed in preparation for the her upcoming show. Padding into her living room, she was met with Toto scurrying to her from his position sadly staring at the door which Avi had just left from. Usually before a show, she would spend an hour or so just chilling and listening to his playlist but that week, hearing the playlist had dampened her mood instead of uplifting it. When she had given Toto a treat and a scratch behind the ear, she walked over to her laptop and selected a song to play. She settled on one of her own favourites while she waited for Mitch, she didn't plan on listening to a song about a bittersweet break up but some how it felt right.

Something always brings me back to you.

Kirstie sang along with the song under her breath as she proceeded to go to the bathroom and prepare her skin for the torture it was going to undergo later with all her show make up. She hated what it did to her skin, she was sick of all the breakout they caused. The day she would end her run of the show would be a joyous one for her skin, it would be able to actually breathe again.

It never takes too long.

All the negativity that Avi had be subjected to had made her hate her career even more than before, she couldn't wait to finish the show in a few months time. Who would want to stay in a career that would bring so much damage to someone you loved?

No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.

Being a broadway star was not what she had expect, she loved the glamour, the songs and the drama but Kirstie was not expecting what came with being in the public eye. She loved all the support she got, her fans truly were the best but there was two sides to fame and her other side turned out to be an evil one. If it wasn't for people believing she was dating Scott, Kirstie was sure the problems people had for her dating Avi would be much less. At first, a select group of 'fans' hated her for supposedly being with Scott, she was seen as the women who took him away from them. Now she was the one who had supposed broken his heart. They couldn't possibly hate Avi just on his own, she knew that, instead the hate he got had stemmed from the hate they had on her. It was like him coming into the picture had transferred all the blame from her onto him.

You hold me without touch.

"Knock knock," Mitch called out from her living room even though he had already let himself into her apartment.

"Just a second!" Kirstie replied from the bathroom and she quickly washed of the face wash she had been using in her face. She walked into the living room, towel in hand and was surprised to see not just Mitch but Scott too.

"We were working on some new video ideas." Scott mumbled sheepishly as he guiltily turned his gaze to Mitch.

"Yeah that's what they call it these days, huh?" She teased back and began to dry her face. Scott and Mitch had a way of cheering her up just by being in the same room as her.

"So... What did you want us for?" Mitch stammered out and Scott giggled nervously next to him, embarrassed to be caught out by his friend.

Kirstie sighed before replying, "it's Avi."

Scott and Mitch shared a worried look before Mitch plucked up the courage to ask what they were thinking, "He hasn't left you has he?"

"No - not yet anyway." Kirstie shook her head and threw her towel into the near by laundry hamper, scooping up Toto as she went.

"So you think it's close?" Scott prompted her, gagging to know the story. Even though he was partial to a good gossip, he was eager to find out what was worrying his best friend so he could make things right again.

"Yeah - and I have no clue what to do about it. I don't want to loose him." Kirstie's tone suddenly became sad, the Scott and Mitch effect had worn off now that she had dwelled on why she had called them over.

She walked and sat down on her couch, cuddling Toto close. She was close to crying, everyone in the room could tell. Scott quickly joined her and wrapped his arm around her to pull her close. Meanwhile, Mitch stood awkwardly in the background, unsure of what his actions should be. He had only know Kirstie for a few months now and had hardly ever seen her that sad before. He had no idea how to go about situations like these so instead chose to observe Scott and follow his lead.

"Is it still your fans getting him down?" Scott asked her and rubbed her back soothingly as she held back tears. The two of them had known about the problems her and Avi were having, it had been hard to keep it from them.

"He just won't talk about it." Kirstie answered quickly so she would be less likely to get chocked up from saying the words.

"Maybe instead of trying to get him to talk to improve your relationship, you should do it the other way round? Like get the romance back and the rest will fall into place?" Scott speculated hopefully and looked over at Mitch do join in. The brunette hurriedly took his place at the other side of her and thought of what words of wisdom he could bestow upon her.

"Yeah. You need to give him a night to remember, do something sentimental, romance him, wear some lingerie - he needs to remember what he's fighting for. And who knows, maybe you'll enjoy it just as much as him?" Even with the smirk that Mitch added at the end, that was the most serious she had ever heard him speak about anything slightly sensual.

"Also, you should probably stop listening to these sad songs..." Scott delivered the line with conviction but she knew he was just teasing her.

"-wait, you do have lingerie right?" Of course Mitch's mind was on the most sexual aspect of his plan.

"Yeah but..." Kirstie trailed off, the last time she had worn it was when she wanted to impress Chase and she certain that she didn't want to be doing that and thinking about him.

"But you used it with someone else - I get you. I'll be back in like thirty minutes, anything else you need while I'm out?" Kirstie was surprised to see Mitch's tone wasn't excited like she would expect but calm and reassuring.

She looked up and met Mitch's gaze, careful not to let his sympathetic eyes make her tears fall. "Yeah, some white wine, I only have red and white's his favourite." She sure as hell was not going to have that conversation sober, there was too much to think about in her life.

"You know I'll get only the best for Kirstie and our sexy busker." Mitch grinned and jumped up off the couch.

"Haha thanks." Kirstie replied was a little lacklustre.

She heard the closing of her door and she turned back to look at her best friend. Seeing him made the tears begin to creep out and watching her break down, Scott tightened his grip on her.

"What do I do after?" Scott could just about make out what she was saying through her sniffles.

"After what?" He mumbled quietly back.

She pulled out of his arms for a second to retrieve a tissue from the box on her coffee table and blew her nose before continuing. "Well if this is a success, what do we do after - the problem will still be there."

"Honestly Kirstie, as much as you guys would hate it, you need to be really open about the relationship. The reason people are judging you so harshly is because they are having to fill in the gaps from the information you've given them." Scott words came out slightly rehearsed and they were, he had been dying to tell her this advice for weeks. He'd been wanting to tell her what she was doing wrong from the beginning since he just knew how things would go down but she was adamant they were going to be exclusive and private and who was he to argue with that, it was none of his business.

"So tell everyone everything?" She clarified and settled back into his arms.

"Yeah - lay your cards out on the table so they could judge you guys for what you've got and not what they imagine. Hopefully then they can just go back to hating you for being close to me because I'm amazing." Scott squeeze her shoulder and smirked.

Kirstie didn't seem to want to lighten the mood with him and instead mutter solemnly, "Avi will take some convincing."

Scott took a moment before replying, holding her close in the hope to comfort her. It always worried him when she didn't react to his jokes, it meant something was seriously wrong. "Maybe but I think after all that has gone wrong already, he will agree easily enough. I'd recommend a livestream or something - that way people see an unedited version of you. There will be no more rumours then, you can even call me just to stop all opportunities for people to interpret things wrong."

"I really hope it all works out, I can't bare to lose him." She let out a tearless sob after she had let those words out, she had been crying so much that week that all of her tears had run out.

"Me too, Kavi is like relationship goals." He attempted once more to perk her up, this time he was dedicated to making it sound as jovial as possible.

Kirstie picked up her head and stared at Scott with an amused look on her face. "Kavi? Really?" It had worked.

"I'm not letting anything take over from Scirstie without an official name." He feigned seriousness before letting out a laugh. He was going to help Kirstie back to her usual happy self, Avi or no Avi (although Scott prayed for him to still be there in the future).

"Of course not, how unprofessional." She giggled for the first time in what felt like forever and the two began to plan what on earth she could do to help out her boyfriend.


	19. Hurt

He knew he shouldn't have walked out like that, not on Kirstie, but he just had to leave the room, it distressed him to be with her. It wasn't that he no longer loved her, that was far from the answer - in fact, he was certain that his love was part of the problem. He loved her so much, he loved her to his very core so the idea that loving her had come at such a cost saddened him. His feelings for her had caused people to attack him which usually he would have been fine with but the sheer scale of it made it unbearable. To know so many people were slandering him and his family online was an awful thought to live with, it was as if they were giving commentary about how he lived his life, it was detached from him but still made an impact. 

He had been feeling like that for almost a week now, Chase had really rilled him up and messed with his emotions. He had broken him, broken his calm and now every problem, every comment was at the forefront of his brain. It made him morose, it made him hate himself. Was he really that unworthy of her love?

As soon as he had left her apartment, he had pulled out his ancient iPhone and began to play songs that fitted his disheartened mood. He was a firm believer that listening to sad songs was a cathartic experience but so far that week, it had not helped, in fact it had only made him feel worse. It had gotten to the point where he felt like he actually liked feeling sorry for himself. It was weird to think about in a good way but he genuinely felt like dwelling on all his problems and being sad about them was helping yet, when he was lying in bed at night, he'd remember how awful the feeling was and realise how wrong he was.

"You're home early?" Esther asked cautiously as he walked into their apartment. She was sitting at the table doing some work when her had returned in a more solemn mood than he had left. His sister had immediately thought the worse. She had been expecting Kirstie to break up with him since he had begun to act like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. If she was his girlfriend (the thought made her cringe) she would have dumped him earlier on in the week, she didn't know how Kirstie had put up with it. In her opinion, Avi was being pathetic and overreacting but that didn't mean she wasn't willing to help him.

"Yeah, I needed to leave." He sighed reluctantly and ran his hand through his hair as he sat down opposite her.

"You are still together though right?" She probed and dreaded to think what he'd become if they had. While Kirstie had brought the problems onto him, she was the only thing that seemed to be keeping him afloat. Esther didn't want to imagine what he'd become without her in his life.

He hummed in response before continuing, "I don't know how long for though." He slouched his head into his arms and sighed once more which drove her crazy.

As much as Esther was happy that her brother and Kirstie were still together, she was still aggravated at how he was acting. She had been sympathetic at first, hugging him even when he didn't want one, making him cups of tea without even being asked, waiting up for him to come home from seeing her every night but after a week, she had begun to be annoyed. He had only gotten worse, more introverted, more un-Avi than before and she knew she had to do something soon or he'd stay like that forever and she wanted her little brother back.

"I'm surprised she's put up with it for this long." She remarked, making sure he could hear her clearly. He had his chance to change with the good cop, now she was hear to verbally slap some sense with him. Sometimes Avi was so sensitive that he needed a heavy hand. Her instincts would tell her to go easy on him, he was younger, he had a big heart but she had learnt from experience that he could get lost in his feelings, dwelling on them until it was unhealthy. When he got like this, it called for a change in approach, the sympathy had got to go.

"Esther..." He groaned into his arms and refused to look up at her, he knew what was coming and knew he deserved it.

"I'm serious Avi, you need to get your shit together," He heard her standing up from her seat at the table and knew without looking that she was looming down on him with her hands on her hips. she always did it when she was angry at him, even when they were little. "I love you so much and hate seeing you this hurt but honestly, you are making a big deal out of nothing. Yeah, some people are saying some awful stuff about you but get used to it, now you are a somebody, you'll always be criticised but the key is to rise above it and show them that you are better than their expectations. You are becoming who they want you to be, this unhappy, aggressive grouch and it's got to stop."

Avi moved his head to rest his chin on his arms but still looked down, fearing the irritated look on her face. "Maybe they are right." He mumbled.

"They aren't. I've known you your entire life and I can tell you that with certainty." Her voice lost it's harsh tone as she placed a hand on his shoulder. There was still a strict edge in it though that reminded him that she wasn't going to give in.

"It's just hard." He whispered, finally braving a glance up at her. The expression he knew to well from his childhood was still there but there was a look of sadness in her eyes that haunted him.

"Remember that quote from the Shakespeare play school forced us to learn, 'The course of true love never did run smooth'? Well it's true, and you need to fight this, to try and get over it." She crouched down next to him and pulled him towards her, his eyes were once more turned away from her, not wanting to view her expression again.

"How?" He sounded in pain and Esther immediately wanted to comfort him but she stood her ground, not wanting to break her tough approach.

"I don't know - stop reading the comments? Actually take Kirstie on a date for once and turn on the Kaplan charm? Have a Lord of the Rings marathon? Actually play your guitar - or sing. You haven't played in ages..." She trailed off, unsure of what else she could say to him. If she had know how to get him out of the funk he was in, she'd be doing it in a heart beat, until then she could only speculate.

"I don't know how she does it." He murmured as his eyes met her's finally. She hated seeing him looking that heartbroken, there was a look of agony on his face at all times and his eyes had lost the light she was too used to viewing. She desperately wanted to be feeling what he was feeling instead of him, just to take away the pain. Even if she had to feel it for the rest of her life, she'd do it, she'd go through that for him just to relieve him of the pain he was feeling.

She stood up and down at him once more because stating cheerlessly, "I have no idea either but if you love her as much as I think you do, you are going to have to try and learn too or you'll loose her forever."

"What can I do?" He looked up at her expectedly, he needed his big sister' guidance on what to do because quite frankly, he was lost. He couldn't think straight from all the angry thoughts he was feeling.

"Well ... you are going to start by apologising for your behaviour tonight when you see her. That would be a good start - oh and no leaving early tonight. I don't want you back till at least five... Now go plan something charming, you've got some making up to do." Esther placed her hands on his shoulders and pulled him out of his chair. She squeezed his shoulders in reassurance, turned him around and began to drum on his back to lead him towards his room.

He closed the door behind him and begun to strip off his clothes and get dressed for work, he knew he needed to think about what Esther had suggested but he couldn't at that moment, it needed a while to set in before he could begin to tackle it. 

"No calling Kevin either. It needs to be from you." Esther called from the other side of the door. 

Avi exhaled deeply and sat down on his bed, not bothering to put on his shirt. He still felt awful, like there was something dark looming over him, and he had no idea how he was going to make it up to her. He wanted to do something nice for her, it would be for him too as he was sure that helping to reignite the connection between them would help his mood greatly. He missed how close they used to be, how happy he was just by seeing her - all he felt that week whenever he had seen her could only be described as bittersweet. He knew he had some explaining to do, and he was doubtless that he needed to do it well or she'd leave him. As much as she loved him, she couldn't put up with his mood swings for much longer, and neither could he. They were becoming toxic and he hated it. He knew he had to try to improve, it wouldn't just happen over night but would take time and he was more that willing to do that for her. Yet first he wanted to get her to stay with him, he needed to reassure her that he was willing to try for her, to fight for them because she deserved it, she deserved to be treated right.


	20. In April

To Avi: I'm going to be running a little late today, will you come meet me at the theatre? xxx

Kirstie leant up against the wall of a hallway deep within the theatre as she waited for a reply. She was currently in between acts and needed for him to text back before she got back on stage just to give her a piece of mind, she couldn't give a good performance if all she could think of is whether or not he had replied. She knew he was at work so the chances of him replying quickly was small but she tried anyway, she was needing him to come to the theatre tonight for her plan to work, especially since it was the only thing her and Scott had come up with for her to do.

Avi: Sure, meet you at the stage door? x

A grin appeared on her face when he replied a minute before she got the call for the next act. She quickly sent him back reply as she walked to put her phone back in her dressing room.

To Avi: Yep! See you then! Text me when you are here xxx

"Okay, he's coming." She announced to Scott as she walked with him up to the stage. It was Scott who had come up with the masterplan and it was perfect, she knew Avi would love it (well, she knew the normal Avi would love it). It was her job to come up with what to do afterwards but so far all she had come up with was another trip to her roof again but it was way too cold in New York to brave going up there that night. Kirstie guessed she'd just have to wing it and come up with something on the spot, or maybe he would have an idea - that's if he was into the idea of continuing the night some more, she was still unsure of how this new Avi would act.

"Good, good. I've talked to Darien and he'll leave everything set up for you, you just have to turn that dial like he showed you." Scott replied as her speedily replied to a text on his phone and handed it to the nearby stage hand to keep it safe for him while he went to perform.

"Right, okay." She nodded, determined to remember the instructions and which dial he was on about, this night had to go perfectly.

After the overture that singled the beginning of the second half, Kirstie watched as Scott walked onto stage for his entrance. She had a couple of lines left before she had to go on her self but already the rush of performing was beginning to make her forget about Avi. When she went on stage, it was like all her problems disappeared (unless they reappeared in the audience of course), she only had to deal with them in the interval and when she left. Despite how much she was beginning to hate her career, the stage was still her safe zone. Musical Theatre would always be her passion and she would always love it but it was the things that came with it that annoyed her. She took a deep breath and drew Avi out of her mind as she walked quickly onto the stage during a black out to take up her position.

The show went by with only a couple of hicks, one of the understudies had forgotten a line or two but that was the most major of the incidences, no hecklers that night. Kirstie took care to take her time after the show, she showered to get rid of the grime of the stage and her make up and even blow dried her hair to give herself an added boost of confidence. She pulled out the things Mitch had gotten her and was surprised to find they were very tasteful and something she'd actually consider buying herself, she had been expecting something a little more kinky from him. She put it on and was surprised to find he had correctly guessed her size, that man was full of wonders, before she quickly pulled her clothes back on over the top. She began to reapply her makeup when she heard a knock on the door.

"It's open!" She called out as she began to blend in her foundation. The door opened to reveal Esther behind it. The two hadn't really talked during the whole problem with Avi, it was just too awkward, instead all the two had managed to do was flash knowing smiles at each other whenever they made eye contact to remind the other that they knew what they were going through.

She pressed herself up against the door gently after she had closed it and looked her square in the eye. "I had a little talk with Avi tonight, I was kinda harsh on him." She stated matter-of-factly.

"Okay?" Kirstie questioned. She could detected from her body language that there was more to what she wanted to say, she'd been keeping it in all week.

Esther closed her eyes before replying in a calm, rehearsed tone. "And I just wanted to let you know that I won't hate you if you break up with him...just make sure you do it right you know, no texts, no p-"

"I'm not going to break up with him." Kirstie interrupted. Maybe that was why Esther had been avoiding her all week, it wasn't because of the mood Avi was in, it was because she thought she was going to break her brother's heart.

"Oh." Her eyes snapped back open as she eyed up her brother's girlfriend who had turned away from her to continue her make up.

Kirstie pulled out a bronzer compact from her makeup bag and began to apply it. "In fact, I've invited him back here for a little surprise to help him get out of whatever he is stuck in." Kirstie mentioned as she moved closer to the mirror to get a better look at her cheeks.

"Oh." Esther replied quietly.

"Is that all you can say now?" Kirstie teased as she turned back to see her friend with a distant look in her eyes as she gaped at her.

"Oh," She joked as she snapped out of her trance like state and grinned at her. He body relaxed as she stood up from against the door and crossed her arms in front of her. "He's been a dick, I'm sorry. I'm surprised you have put up with him for this long."

Even though it pained her to agree with what she said, Kirstie was appreciative of her apology. He really had been hard to deal with this past week. "I love him." Was all she replied, she certainly wasn't going to tell Esther, who was over protective enough as it is, that she agreed her brother had been a dick.

Esther began to pace her room slightly to have something to do. Talking about her brother's relationship with his girlfriend is not the most comfortable of situations. "I know, I can tell. He deserves someone to love him as much as you do."

Kirstie smiled at her through the mirror and turned around to face her. "How long do you think it will be?" She asked timidly. If anyone knew the answer to that, it would be Esther.

"It depends on what you have planned for tonight..." A mischievous grin spread across Esther's face as Kirstie began to blush and giggle slightly. She knew her blush gave away what she had planned and she watched as Esther slowly grew more and more awkward at the thought of what she was joking about actually being true. He was her brother after all, thinking about that was just disgusting to her.

"I've told him he's not allowed back into the apartment until at least five, I'll be guarding the door and everything so hopefully that will give you plenty of time if he starts acting up again." She murmured rapidly to try and move on the conversation from her brother's sex life.

"Thanks." That was all Kirstie could get out with the uncomfortable atmosphere that had been created in the room.

"Good luck, I really hope you get through to him." Esther stammered awkwardly and looked at the group as she turned to leave the room.

"Thanks." Kirstie called out after her. When the door had closed, she let out a giggle at how embarrassing that conversation had turned out to be and began to go back to work. It was refreshing to know that if things didn't work out between them, she wouldn't loose Esther's respect. She was such a good friend and such an amazing person that she would hate to know she had a disliking for her, she'd dislike herself also.

After she had finished her make up and made the final preparations for getting ready, she collected her stuff and took a long and lonely walk up to the auditorium. When she had reached the darkened room, she immediately went over to Darien's lighting desk in the corner to turn on the stage lights. Even though she loved the theatre, there was nothing creepier than being in the auditorium alone and in the dark, she had no idea who or what could be lurking in there. She began to run through her plan, rehearsing and rehearsing as much as she could before Avi arrived. Kirstie was determined to make this right for him, it was almost as if this was her one last shot to save their relationship. Their fate rested on her pulling this off smoothly, she needed it to be as natural and un-awkward as possible. Once they got out of this place they were stuck in, things would begin to look up.

She was playing with the dials on the lighting deck when she heard her phone buzz and she knew it must be Avi either at the stage door or lost. She sighed knowing it was crunch time and checked her phone, turned out he hadn't gotten lost and had managed to locate his way to the locked stage door. Quickly she set up the lights to be just how she wanted them to be and stood up, she ran her hands down her outfit to smooth it out and nervously began to walk back stage and in the direction of the stage door.

Her hands toyed with the lock of the door until she plucked up the courage to open it and let him in. Kirstie was surprised with what she saw, Avi actually looked as if he had put an effort in that night (not that he no longer looked good to her, she had the hots for him whatever the condition his appearance was in), she could tell he had combed his hair and had carefully selected an outfit that matched. She could even detect the smell of cologne on him as soon as she had opened the door and despite the somber look that still occupied his face, she knew something had changed. Avi even had his guitar with him.

"Hey." She pulled him inside and out of the chilly wind before wrapping her arms around his neck. Avi reciprocated with more force than he had done the rest of that week but he was still a long way from where they had been before.

"Hi... so what has happened that means I had to meet you here?"He mumbled into her shoulder. He pulled away slightly to gesture to their surroundings.

"Come with me." She smirked, choosing not to answer him. Instead she grabbed his hand and began to lead him through the darkened labyrinth that was back stage.

"Okay..." He anxiously whispered behind her, unsure of what was going on. He genuinely thought there was an actually reason she had been kept behind, like an emergency rehearsal or a cast member's birthday party.

Avi had no clue where he was going, it was too dark to see and he'd never set foot inside the theatre before, all he was aware of was the sharp turns she kept on forcing him to make. "How do you not get lost in here?" He huffed.

"Oh trust me, I still do sometimes." She giggled in front of him as he gradually began to see some lights behind a door, they were definitely getting nearer. Kirstie opened the door for the both of them, hand still in his, and Avi became awe stuck from the beauty of the auditorium. It was one of the older ones in the city and had been built in a mock Victorian Era architecture which made it look breathtaking. Avi turned to see the stage lit up with the backdrop he had seen in many of the photo's he had seen from the show. It truly looked great. He now knew why she loved this place so much.

Kirstie dragged her down a short corridor to a curtain and led them into the seating area. She pulled him towards the front row, released his hand and placed them onto of his shoulders.

"Now sit right here, you get a front row view." Kirstie put pressure on his shoulders until he removed his guitar from his back and complied, sitting down looking confused. She giggled once more at the expression on his face that she could just about see with only the stage lights on and began to stroll away from him.

Pulling back a curtain backstage, Kirstie found the stereo system that Darien and Scott had left there for her and started to pull it to centre stage. She would have loved for it to look more professional but since they used a live orchestra and authentic sound effects, the system they had in the theatre was tacky at best. Avi looked up at her in curiosity as she placed the sound system onto the floor and she walked over to the edge of the stage to crouch down as near as she could to him.

"I wanted to do something special for you." She announced excitedly and watched as his expression grew gradually more curious.

"Oh." Was all he replied - what is it with the Kaplan's and 'oh'?

"I know you've been down - we all do, but don't worry, i'm not going to pry you to talk about your feelings." She gestured to the uneasy look that had appeared on his face at the thought of her doing just that. "Just know that I love you and want to help you through this. I don't know what I would do without you."

She exhaled and stood up, preparing herself for what she was about to do. She didn't understand why she was nervous, she had sung on that stage too many times to count. "I spent the hour after you left going through the songs you had sang on the train since I wanted to return the favour and this one seemed the most fitting...I hope you enjoy."

Kirstie knelt down to press play on the system and stood up quickly, getting ready to sing for the last time that day on that stage. She was incredibly nervous, not only was the daunting nature of the situation eating her away, it was the first time he would hear her properly sing live.

_The day we met my life was changed. I always heard that love was strange and painful, painful._

Kirstie closed her eyes as she begun to sing, she knew if she looked at him staring at her she would begin to get choked up. The lyrics ran too true to her. He had certainly changed her life for the better the moment he had stayed on that train, she'd become happier, she was in love but that love certainly had a painful aspect to it.

_One night you slept upon your side tangled in white you looked just like an angel, an angel._

Avi was perfect. He was meant for her, she knew it and she'd be a fool to let him leave her life without a fight. She knew the love they had didn't come often, she had felt the connection the first time she had seen him on the east side line and that connection had only grown stronger since. She'd fight to the bitter end just to stay with him a little longer.

So why did you fly away? I've been dying a little death since that very day.

The moment Avi had been lost to his troublesome thoughts, she had become lost too. Kirstie had gotten so used to being with him that the moment he began to pull away she had felt the absence of him, they were just so in sync. When he hurt, she did. When he felt distant, so did she. Their relationship was one of equals, both taking and giving as much as the other.

_I used to laugh, when you told me: 'you must forget and forgive to be free'._

It was true, Avi had been like that. He had been the one to tell her that they could fight this, they could get through it but now it appeared like he was not listening to his own words. She had clung to them in times of need whereas he appeared to leave them deserted. Due to his quick abandonment of every promise he'd made that they would be fine, she had begun to think that maybe he had never believe the words he had said himself.

_Down by the water, dressed in black, I swore revenge to get you back, hateful, hateful._

Kirstie began to think of her life without him, how lonesome and sad it would be. She'd go back to hating herself and the career she was only just beginning to see the joy in again. She'd never be able to look at Esther again without feeling upset at seeing similar facial features to him. She would not set foot on the subway again, if she did she'd only be haunted by the ghost of him there. The rest of her life would be spent thinking about 'what ifs' and forever she would be comparing her relationships to the passion they had, knowing full well she would never find someone who made her feel like he did.

_I made my camp upon the hill, drank whiskey from the secret still blameful, blameful._

The past week had been awful. She hated not seeing him happy, it killed her to look at him and not see the smile she had grown to love or that devilish look in his eye that meant he was going to tease her. She had missed his presence, she'd only seen him in fleeting incidences and none of them had satisfied how much she wanted to be with him. They had never been the couple the needed to spend every moment of the day together, they both respected and loved their alone time but the amount of times she had seen him that week had made her want him more. She never saw him for more than a couple of hours at a time before he would make up an excuse to leave.

_So why did you fly away? I've been dying a little death since that very day._

She finally looked up to see him staring at her, a slight smile had appeared on his face that she hadn't seen in a while. Unless she was mistaken, she was sure he was appreciating her romantic gesture. She knew that he loved sentimental things, he was too much of a family man not to, so she thought singing a song to him that reminded them of before they had officially met. Everything had been so new and exciting then, every look would send butterflies, every night she would rush to see him but now things had changed, it felt like he was desperate to end things with her even though she knew that was not the case.

_I used to laugh, when you told me: 'you must forget and forgive to be free'._

She missed his optimism, she missed how special she had felt when he cried the first time he told her he loved her, she missed the glances they would give each other across a crowded train carriage. More prominently, she missed how content she felt with him, like nothing could stop them, like they were an unstoppable force destined to be together for all eternity. She missed feeling like her life was only just beginning, every time he wrapped his arms around her, she'd believe that there was so much promise in a future with him.

_And I never could admit, the part I had in it so this is what I get, my friend._

The divide between them, despite the fact he had been the one with the mood swings, had been cause because of her too. She'd been the one that forced him too hard to talk to her when he didn't want to, she had brought the hate, she'd been the one to respond angrily to comments on twitter which only caused more havoc. No one wanted to admit they weren't perfect but she couldn't deny the part she had towards what they had become.

_Drunk in a field of scarlet snow, I reconciled with your ghost in April, April._

She closed her eyes once more, no longer wanting to watch him react to the lyrics she was singing, she was already close to chocking up and seeing the wistful look in his eyes would only make her more likely to do so. She hated to see him in pain, it hurt her too. He meant the world to her and to see him so down made her want to scream, she'd do anything to take the pain away from him.

_I stood before the hypocrite, there in the mirror brightly lit, shameful, shameful._

The way she had handled this situation had not helped. She had been quick to argue back at him even when she knew she was in the wrong, she would become obviously annoyed at him whenever he did something wrong, and whenever he was feeling particularly more down than usual, she had burdened him with begging for him to talk about it even though she knew he didn't want to. If she had just acted differently, perhaps they wouldn't be in this mess.

_Now, I know why you ran away and I've been dying a little death since that very day._

The problems he was having had become clearer and clearer to her throughout the week the more she thought about them. She got it now, she understood. Everything was beginning to look up in his life but it had come at a cost. He had gone from a lonely, struggling musical, battling his inner demons about not being talented or lucky enough to make it, to a place in the spotlight, to be asked to sing at charity galas, to being head over heels in love. All his dreams had come true in a matter of weeks but he had felt the consequences for having that happened to him. It was almost as if fate was finally giving him all he wanted and then trying to rip it away in front of him as soon as he was beginning to enjoy it and she certainly didn't want to be taken away from him.

_I used to laugh, when you told me: 'you must forget and forgive, you must forgive just to live. You must forget and forgive to be free'._

As she finished, she looked back up at him, anxious to how he would act. She thought she had gotten to know him well but that past week, everything she had thought she knew about him had gone out of the window, he had been so unpredictable. She saw him crying again for the second time since they had gotten together but even in the darkness, she could see that these weren't tears of anguish, they were far from being good tears also but he was finally letting his emotions out in a cathartic, bittersweet moment.

He stood up to meet her with open arms as she climbed off the stage to meet him. The two were finally on the same page, they were beginning to understood fully what the other was going through and they were starting to see the hope in their relationship again. She felt his tears against her neck as he tugged her into her, belatedly letting her in after a week of hell. The feeling of him sobbing slightly against her and the emotions that came with her being in his loving embrace after all they had happened made tears begin to form in her eyes and she let her self succumb to her overwhelming emotions. Sometimes all you needed was a good cry to let everything out so you can begin make things better once more.


	21. Don't Let Me Go

"I love you." He muttered through sniffles into her shoulder.

Kirstie responded by squeezing him closer. "Oh Avi ... I love you too."

He pulled away to look at her, his eyes already beginning to be puffy and red but a smile was starting to form on his face. It was the first genuine smile she had seen from him in days. "We're a mess." He chuckled slightly.

She chuckled herself out of joy of seeing him look actually happy again. "Yeah well love is messy."

Avi moved his arms from around her to cup her face. His eyes bore into her, trying to express with just a look all the bound up emotions he had. "I really love you."

"I really love you." She replied cooly under his gaze, tightening her arms around his waist. Just weeks ago having him look at her like that would make her blush over how overwhelmed she felt but since she had grow closer to him, his looks had become easier and easier to decipher. It was quickly becoming her second language.

"I'm sorry, I was an ass." He began to play with her hair until all the stray pieces were safely tucked behind her ears.

"I think I can find it in my heart to forgive you." She smirked up at him. She was grateful for his apology, she knew she deserved it but she knew that dwelling on his behaviour this week would just push him away again. Her pleading with him to talk about feelings was one of the reasons there were in this mess after all.

"I'm going to try and get out of this, you know. For you." He leaned in to kiss a tear off of her cheek, pulling back slightly only to move in again and kiss her nose causing it to crinkle.

"I'll be with you every step of the way." Kirstie pulled away to get a good look at him. The tears from her own eyes had already begun to dry, she had cried so much that week that she did't have any left, whereas he had a steady stream of tears that crept out of his eyes every few seconds.

"I suppose now would be a good time to tell you." He mumbled and squeezed his eyes shut, letting the tears that were storing there fallout.

"...Tell me what?" She stammered, thinking the worse. She had literally just got him to let her in again and now she was certain he was getting ready to dump her right there and then.

He kept his eyes shut as she stared at him, waiting for the dreaded answer she was expecting. "I booked a flight to go home... It was an impulse buy, I need to clear my head." He muttered in one breath, wanting to get his secret out on the open as quickly as possible.

She had no idea how she managed to keep it together but she somehow got her next question out without breaking down. "Right... how long will you be gone?"

"I don't know - I haven't bought a return yet." His arms dropped to her shoulders as he sighed. 

She thought her tears had ran out but the sudden serge that had appeared on her cheeks suggested otherwise. "Oh... so is this, like, over?" She began to sob knowing that the worst had come. All her nightmares and things she swore would never happen occurred all at once and she couldn't believe how hopeful she had been. She had been stupid to think he'd stay with her, especially after he saw the mean comments mentioned about his family. He was leaving her, they were over. The relationship they shared had been crumbled in a matter of seconds.

"No, no. Kirstie please don't cry over me again. We are far from being over." His tears came a little heavier at the sight of her crying and he wrapped his arms back around her and drew her closer than before, holding her tight to him to reassure her he wasn't leaving her for good. "I just don't feel okay right now in the city, there's too much going on that I don't think it is good for my health. I'll be back eventually, I promise. I'll miss you too much."

"Please don't go." She clutched at him in an attempt to keep him there with her but she knew it was no use, he had to go, he had to leave her albeit momentarily. 

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I need to, I'm sorry. I think I'll only get worse if not."

She inhaled deeply as she calmed herself down, drying her eyes on her sleeve thankful she had chosen to wear waterproof mascara that night. "Right, okay. When do you leave?"

He leant back to take a look at her and was relieved to see she had managed to stop her crying. "The day after tomorrow. I should have told you sooner but I was scared you'd hate me, especially with the way I've been acting lately."

"Yeah, you should have - but it doesn't matter, if it will make you feel better then you have to do it for you, for us?"She placed her hands on the collar of the leather jacked he was wearing and began to play with it. She was going to have to make the rest of her time with him special, to ensure he would return to her.

"I'm so sorry Kirst." He reached down, pulling away from her slightly, and got a tissue out of his pocket to wipe his eyes that were only just starting to dry out.

She smiled sadly up at him. "I'm sorry too."

"You have nothing to be sorry about." He pushed the tissue back into his pocket as he wrapped his arm back around her, staring directly into her eyes once more.

"I do, I pushed you to talk to me too much." Kirstie slipped her hands up to his neck to play with the hair she found there. He had decided to wear a beanie that night thanks to the cold weather so she was slightly restricted but she didn't care.

He leaned his forehead in to rest upon hers. "You only did it because you care."

"True." She giggled slightly.

"Thanks for the song by the way, I really loved it." He smiled at her which she could only just make out thanks to the close proximity of their faces.

"You did?" She bit her lip, hoping he was telling the truth and not saying it just to please her. She had learnt it in less than an hour so she hadn't had long to perfect it like she would have hoped to.

"Yeah. Actually, I had planned to sing for you as well tonight but I don't think I can top that." He moved his head away from hers so he could use it to gesture to the guitar he had placed on the seat next to where he was sitting.

"Could you, please? I haven't heard you play in too long." She looked up at him with pleading eyes. She had forgotten how soothing hearing him sing was, it had been so long since he had sang in front of her. He had stopped busking on the train since he was beginning to gain extra money from his website and he'd been too depressed the last week to pull out his guitar and randomly start playing like he used to.

He nodded slowly as he responded. "It has been a while."

"Please?" She begged him playfully and pulled on his jacket, finally settling back into how she usually acted around the old Avi.

"Okay." He grinned back at her - he actually grinned, as in a plastered from ear to ear grin. It was so refreshing to see. "Should we get out of here?"

"Sure. I have no idea where to go next, I haven't planned that far." Kirstie stepped out of his grasp to go and gather her stuff as he did the same with his.

He pulled his jacket zipper up further as he prepared himself to face the New York air once more. "Let's just go back to yours, it's too cold to be lingering on the streets tonight."

She reached out for his hand which he took after he kindly took some of the stuff she was holding out of her grasp and held it under his arm. They made their way over to the lightning desk first and plunged the room into darkness which started both of them and the moved a lot closer to one another, ready to protect the other from any ghosts lingering in the darkness.

The two of them (well more like Kirstie) managed to successfully navigate the two of them over to the stage door and out onto the only slightly bustling street, it wasn't tourist season anymore so the city had calmed down dramatically. 

"Are you excited to see your family?" They had had too many trips back to her apartment in silence that she wanted to fill the void with small talk.

"Totally, I miss my Mom like mad." He mumbled next to her and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her into his side as they walked towards the nearest station that took them to the Upper East.

She looked over to him hopefully and bit her lip. "Do you think I'll get to meet her one day?"

Avi knew she had only asked that to test the waters on whether or not he still believed in this relationship but she didn't have to, he did whole heartedly. "If I have anything to say about it, you will." He replied, telling her what she needed to hear.

As they waited for the next train, Kirstie had somehow gotten him to retell some of his finest memories of him and his family back in California. They hadn't really talked about their families much yet, they had really only been together a month and they had had plenty of other things to do and talk about.

When they were getting out of the train, Kirstie felt reassured in the open air of the street to ask him a more serious question. "What did Esther say to you then?"

He sighed and pulled her closer, knowing full well she had only asked because she cared. "She had some choice words about how I've been acting. I think it was the kick I needed."

"I know this will take time Avi, you don't have to act like you are suddenly fine around me, I know you too well now." She mumbled into his shoulder. It was no a lie, she'd wait forever just to be with him.

"Sorry." He murmured as the got into the elevator up to her floor, happy to be in the warmth of her apartment building.

"Stop saying that." Kirstie rolled her eyes him as she nudge his shoulder playfully.

"I love you." He nudged her back.

She giggled and pulled him in for a short kiss. "Never stop saying that."

Turning out of his arms, she lead them out of the elevator to open the door to her apartment and let him in. Toto immediately came scurrying over to him to try and get some love from him, sensing he was in a lot better mood that earlier on in the day. Kirstie scoffed at how excited her dog was to see her boyfriend and not her, there was times he'd run up to her instead of the others she would be with but nope, Toto was all about Avi. She didn't blame him though, so was she.

"I've got wine, do you want some - it's white."

"Sure." He smiled at her, it was rare she offered him an alcoholic beverage he actually liked. It was usually with red wine or some sugary and unnatural spirt Mitch had bought for her, never scotch but he'd settle for white wine.

"So what were you planning to sing for me, was it something you sang before?" She called over her shoulder as she strolled to the kitchen to pull out some wine glasses from the cupboard. She could hear him taking his jacket, beanie and converse off in the hallway and attempting to keep Toto away from taking them as his own personal trinket. When she saw the age on the bottle she laughed at herself, trust Mitch to go all out and buy her a bottle of wine that probably cost something ridiculous. 

"No I just learnt it today after I left. I don't think it will be nearly as good as yours though." They met as the two both walked into her living room, him with his guitar and her wine two very full glasses of wine.

The wine she placed on the nightstand after she had led them into her room. She knew her puppy would be wanting to sleep - it was way past his usual bedtime after all - so she had decided it would be better to put a wall between them. Also, the bedroom would be a more appropriate place for her to execute her plan.

"Don't say that." She rolled her eyes at him as she whipped off her coat and boats and moved to put them into the closet where she kept them.

"It's true, I'm an amateur compared to you." Avi sat down on the bed quietly as he watched her go about the room.

She turned to him with her hands on her hips. "Stop doubting yourself and play for me, I'll be the judge on whether you are worthy or not."

"Well, since you gave a little speech, I think I should too." He spoke as she came to sit with him on the bed, he turned to face her and began to tune his guitar, resting his leg against the bed for support. "So I chose this song to beg you not to split up with me but I guess that's a little pointlessness really..."

She looked at him expectedly and took a sip of her wine as he trailed off, waiting for him to start. When he glanced at her nervously at after he had finished tuning and she gave him an excited nod to motion to him to start playing.

_There are moments in this life that you can't fake it. There are moments I would walk another road._

Kirstie had begun to feel content and calm the moment he started playing. There was just something about him and his guitar that could make her feel better after the crappiest of days. Originally she thought he had this power because he was really talented but she knew now it was a mixture of that and just how much she loved him. Just hearing him sing reminded her of how great her was and how he had chosen her out of all the girls in the city to sing to.

_There was something in the broken way you said it. Singing, "Please, oh God, do not let me go."_

Kirstie hated to interrupt him but she couldn't stand it any more. As calming as his music was, the lyrics hurt. "Stop." If he had continued singing about that subject, she was bound to break down again and she wasn't mentally prepared to do that again.

"You don't like it?" He furrowed his brow in confusion, she'd never stopped him from sining before.

"No - I will just start crying if you continue." She beamed at him and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder to convey he had not done anything wrong.

"Oh." There it was again, the famous Kaplan 'oh'.

Her expressed changed suddenly to one of concern. "Do you really think like that? Like you need to plead with me to stay with you?"

"You're magical and well ... I'm a nobody." He shamefully looked down to his lap, not wanting to look her in the eye.

She knew he was beginning to fall into that dark place again but she was determined to do everything in her power not to let it happen again. "You are definitely more than worthy. I couldn't imagine anyone more perfect."

"That's not true, I was practically broke when you met me." He leant over her to collect his wine from the nightstand and took a big swig of it, not caring how strong it was.

She rubbed his arm reassuringly, praying a comforting touch would help him somehow. "There's more to life than money Avi."

"Tell that to the rest of New York." He grumbled and took another drink. Kirstie made a mental note not to pour a glass that big next time.

"Avi, you are perfect and I love you." She pulled on his arm until he looked at her with his sorrowful eyes. The look reminded her of just how far he still had to go. She had forgotten for a moment how awful he still probably felt, their jokes and flirting had been somewhat normal that she couldn't remember what it had been like the past few days but that look brought her straight back. "Seriously, you are. I just hope that one day you'll be able to see it too." She spoke softly to him.

"I have no idea why you love me so much, I'm a coward." He grimaced and took another sip of his wine and Kirstie hoped he didn't ask for another, she didn't have the heart to refuse him.

She placed her own wine glass back on the nightstand hopefully to send Avi the subliminal message to do the same and wrapped her hands around one of his. "You're not a coward...and I thought I made the reason why I love you very clear."

"Yeah, well I don't understand it." He put the empty wine glass back on the nightstand, they both knew he'd regret drinking it that fast in about an hour.

"Avriel Kaplan, I love you. You are indescribable, you are amazing. You are super talented, you are the most kind hearted person I've met. I'm so glad to have you in my life." She stated and leaned in to give him a kiss hoping that if her words failed to show him her feelings, her body surely would do the job.

"How can you say that after how awful I've been acting this week?" He looked at her like she was crazy which made her decided that that was enough talking about emotions for the night.

"Because what we have is worth fighting for. To keep you in my life, I'd fight till the end." She finished with a smirk and stood up in front of him, knowing it was time to reveal her plan. Kirstie knew if not things would just continue to go downhill, it would only be a matter of time until the alcohol kicked in and he'd be spilling out everything to her - he was a very emotional drunk. She looked at him, reeling in his expression as she reached up to start unbuttoning her shirt and he realised what she was doing. His eyes focused on her chest, watching carefully as she opened the buttons one by one, getting further and further down as she went. He swallowed powerfully when she threw her shirt to the side and revealed the lacy, and extremely revealing, blue bra that Mitch had gotten her. She giggled at the dumbfounded look on his face and reached down to undo her pants, quickly discarding them from her body.

"Oh - well, um. That's, um, really something." He stuttered out like a fool.

"You think so?" She bit her lip, careful not to burst out laughing at his amusing response and just hoped it looked sexy.

"Erm, yeah." He swallowed again and nervously moved his guitar to the floor.

"You're cute." She smirk down at him, sending his mind (and body) into overdrive, he loved it when she smirked, especially when he knew it was meant to seduce him. 

"You're beautiful." He blushed as she sat down on his lap and begun to kiss his neck making him breath deeply. "You didn't have to do this for me."

She detached her lips from his neck to look up at him. "No I didn't, but I wanted to. Now sit back and relax."

"I can't really relax with you wearing that." He mumbled distractedly as his hands fell onto her thighs and pulled her closer to him.

"Shh." She managed to get out of her lips before they were on his. She moved slowly and careful at first which annoyed him greatly. His girlfriend was wearing lingerie while straddling his lap and kissing him but she was going way too slow for anyone to fulfil their desires, it was frustrating. He wound his hand into her hair and pulled her in for a deeper kiss, hoping she would get the message.

"Be patient." She giggled through kisses but let him have the gratification of moving things along at a faster pace. Kirstie removed her hands from him and reach down to the bed to steady herself as she manoeuvred him to lay down. When they were safely down on the bed, she began to attack his buttons, grinning widely as she pulled away from him, content to see that he was finally wanting to make love to her again instead of just getting each other off. 

It certainly wasn't perfect, and it certainly wasn't back to how they used to be but it was a step in the right direction, their relationship was far from being over.


	22. Each Coming Night

He'd been gone a week now and every second Kirstie ached for him to be back. He didn't even need to be with her to fill that gap, just knowing he was back in the city would have made her feel whole again, knowing that she could just get on a train to go and see him. Avi had been in touch, it was't like he had fallen off the face of the earth but the occasional message and the odd phone call was not enough to suffice for him not being in the city.

Kirstie had done everything to feel like he was close to her once more. She'd visit Annie's whenever she was wanting comfort food and to remember him, she'd go to his apartment to visit Esther whenever she could just to feel close to him, she'd even invested in some extra pillows to make her bed feel less empty at night. So far all they had done was made her feel slightly better for a brief period of time, but none of them had made her feel less lonely.

She knew she should just suck it up a wait for him to come back (if he ever did) and stop wallowing in self pity but she just couldn't bring herself to do it, she missed him too much. Instead she found herself outside of an high end apartment in Northern Brooklyn in the break between her matinee and evening performances. Kirstie knocked weakly at first, unsure whether or not this was the right address or whether he would be in but when she heard the shuffling of the feet towards the door and a familiar face behind it, she knew she had found the right place.

"Hey..." She mumbled, looking down at her feet. She felt guilty, like she had invaded his privacy or broke an undisclosed line between the two of them. He was Avi's friend, not her's, the idea of her being there without him was almost absurd.

"Hey, Kirst - come on in, I was just making coffee." Kevin greeted warmly, if he was uncomfortable with her being there he certainly wasn't showing it.

His apartment was grand for Brooklyn, it was complete with wood finishings and plenty of paintings and books, perfectly expressing his man of the world status. It still had the homely but slightly dingy feel of Brooklyn though, no amount of decorating would get rid of that but Kirstie didn't know why anyone would, it reminded her of her childhood, of her dreams and when she first came to the city. She had never really thought about how much money Kevin earned, it was rude to pry but she had assumed that being a back up of the Philharmonic was job that payed not so well but had many perks (such as being invited to various galas and events) however from the state of the place where he lived, he got both. No wonder Avi was so insecure about underachieving.

"So what brings you here?" He called over his shoulder as he brought her into a reasonably sized kitchen for New York, not even the Upper East had big kitchens so finding a good sized one in Brooklyn must of been hard to come by.

Remembering that it was rude, Kirstie stopped her scanning of his apartment with her eyes and cleared her throat to reply to him. "Erm, I just wanted to see how you were doing since I haven't seen you since your birthday and Avi never gave me your number so I thought i'd just drop-"

"You miss him, don't you?" He smirked at her, seeing through her disguise straight away. He wasn't offended that that was the real reason she had come to see him, he was used to being on the sidelines and he understood how much Avi meant to her, he'd only recently found someone like that in his life too.

"...Maybe. I did also want to come a see you, though." She shuffled awkwardly trying to talk her way out of admitting the truth, it was rather bad-mannered of her to come to someone's house just to talk about someone else.

"He'll be back soon, I promise you." He called over his shoulder as he busied himself with the coffee. Suddenly he turned to face her with a grin on his face. "You can sit down you know?" He teased.

Kirstie blushed at his noticing of her uncomfortableness and quickly sat down in the hopes that she could calm down and redeem herself.

When she had finally regained her composure, she begun to talk about why she was there. "His messages are getting few and far between."

"He will be back, he loves you too much." She could see why Avi was so fond of Kevin, he knew exactly what to say and when to say it.

"Has he mentioned coming back to you at all?" She asked nervously. Avi had avoided talking about his return with her - well it felt like it anyway, if there was anyone he was going to discuss that with it would have been Kevin, him and Esther were never really keen on emotional chatter.

"No not yet but he will, trust me and don't panic. I have never met a man more in love than Avi is with you, I doubt he could stay away even if he wanted to." He turned to face her, steaming coffee mugs in both hands and found his way into the seat next to her at the counter.

"I just feel like he will never come back." She mumbled as she poured milk into her coffee and stirred it, concentrating on the movements intently in the bid to take her mind off of things.

Kevin reached out and moved her mug away from her causing her to snap her head up at him. "He will, don't worry. This sabbatical is long over due, he has a lot of problems and I know he wants to get his head clear before he starts things again." His voice was soothing and his words were perfect but her mood remained the same.

She raised her eyebrows at him, intrigued, and pulled her mug back towards her to take a sip. "What do you mean 'a lot of problems'?" She had some idea to what he was referring to, Avi had disclosed many things about his past to her but he had never dwelled on how it had made him feel.

"I'm sure you sort of know this already but he was miserable before he met you." She did know it but it had never been said before, she had just assumed it from the stories. There was something about it being said out loud that gave it a new resonance to her like when the Buddha saw suffering for the first time after hearing rumours of it for years.

She studied his face closely, hoping to find some clue of just how bad he had been. "Yeah, he told me but I never knew the extent of it."

"Don't panic, he wasn't suicidal or anything like that... it was like he was never fully there, his mind was always else where whenever you talked to him, somewhere sad." He sighed loudly in the memory of his friends troubles and took a long sip of his own coffee before continuing. "It was worrying to watch."

She looked away for a second, unable to watch him as her mind went over what he had just told her. His past had been challenging, she had know that, but she would have hated to see him that miserable. She loved to protect him and look after him yet from the sounds of it, it had been so much deeper than the average problem. "So he just needs a bit more time then?"

"Yeah, you know him, he's a very emotional guy. Even though that's a blessing, it also is a curse... Just give him a while, he wants to sort things out for you." Kevin finished with a smile to hopefully add to the reassuring. Kevin was a fixer and would do whatever it took to solve a problem, even if it was for a stranger. He knew that what Kirstie needed was reassurance, everything he was telling her the reasoning part of her already knew but she needed help to convince the rest of her mind about that too.

"He'll definitely come back?" She asked hopefully and with a smile, she'd asked that question too many times in the ten minutes she had been there.

"For the thousandth time, yes he will." He stated clearly and chuckled.

She set her hands down on the counter with clarity and looked at him determinedly. She knew she needed to get her mind off of thinking constantly about Avi and getting to know Kevin would be a good place to start. "Well then, now that's over is there anything I can help you with?"

He paused for a moment in thought before turning slowly towards her. "Actually there is, I need date ideas."

"Avi never told me you were seeing someone?" Kirstie screwed up her brow in confusion, she was sure she would have remembered if Avi had told her that, she loved a good romance story.

Kevin nodded in understanding. "It's fairly new, I met her a couple of days after the gala. I've mentioned it to him but with all that's been on his mind lately I doubt he thought about it more than once." His reply came with a trouble undertone, Kirstie wasn't the only one who had been affected my Avi's sudden change in mood.

"When he gets back I'm sure he'll be a lot more responsive about it." She reached over and placed a comforting hand on his forearm.

Kevin grinned at the irony of them changing roles. "He better be, I need my wingman! I may be the logical one but he's the romantic, I could really use his help right now."

"Well you just have to put up with me then." Kirstie giggled, she knew the two of them were going to be good friends.

"How did Avi do it?" Kevin muttered nonchalantly.

"Do what?"

"Get you to fall head over heels for him in something stupid like a week." He grinned at her knowing it was true.

"It's the Kaplan charm, it wins everyone over." She smirked as it was too true. In the space of a month he had won over everyone close to her. Her dog was now more excited to see him than her, Mitch was forever making flirty remarks towards him, he'd managed to get Scott to lower his defences over her quicker than any other guy she had seen before, and even her mom would ask after him before she would ask about her daughter and she had never even met him!

"Or was it his hips?" He smirked suggestively at her before starting to giggle at what he just said. Kirstie was taken back at first at the sheer hilarity of his laugh but she quickly found herself unable to keep from laughing along.

"Kevin!" She gasped through giggles.

"My mom will kill me for that one!" He wheezed as he began to calm down, he still let out the odd chuckle but it was no where near the hyena like laugh from before.

Kirstie's grin stuck to her face even after he had stopped laughing, his positivity was just so contagious. "Anyway, he sang to me a lot - that kinda did the trick. Maybe you could play the cello or something for her... What else do you have up your sleeve?"

He bit his lip and looked upwards as if he was searching for the idea in his brain with his eyes. "I can beatbox, I can speak Chinese, I could probably quote some Shakespeare."

"Wait, go back a minute. You speak Chinese?" Kirstie gaped at him, Kevin was filled with surprises. She had thought that the Cello made him very impressive already but adding the beatboxing just made her appreciate him more and the Chinese? Kirstie wouldn't be surprised if he told her he could ride a unicycle while juggling fire, he was just that talented.

"Yep."

"How?!" She squealed, she'd never met anyone who wasn't already Chinese who spoke it as a second language.

"I took a year out to study abroad there and came back to be in the same class as Avi. That's why we graduated at the same time." He grinned as he told her, proud of his achievements.

"Wow. This girl's lucky, I never knew you were so talented!" Kirstie declared excitedly.

"Well Avi was probably too busy trying to win you over to talk about me but just you wait. When the excitement of a new relationship dies down between you he'll be gushing about me - his true love - all the time." He tried to tell her indifferently but she knew he was dying to laugh.

"Really?" She amusedly asked.

Kevin had to pull his face into a frown to keep himself from laughing. "Yeah, we are meant to be. You and Alyssa are just distractions." He waved his hand in dismiss of her with made her giggle.

"Speaking of, let's get back to planning - where have you taken her already?" She asked quickly, wanting to change the subject away from Avi.

"I love how you want to avoid the talk of anyone else being with Avi, it's cute." Kevin grinned at her which made her get flustered once more. He was completely correct, even though she knew he was joking, she hated thinking about Avi being with anyone else. She loved him too much to even want to consider him in a relationship without her, it may of been selfish of her to think it but she never wanted to see him be with anyone else.

"Thanks... now answer the question, we won't get anywhere if not." She mumbled, trying to stay back on task to avoid further embarrassment.

Kevin gave her a sideways knowing glance before giving in to her request."Well she's newish in town so she wanted to do cliché touristy things while she can get away with it before becoming a 'true New Yorker'. I took her to see Lady Liberty, we went to the Museum of Natural History, we even spent the night in Times Square?"

"Okay." She pursed her lips together, calculating a plan. "Has she been to see a show yet?"

"No why, what are you thinking? Should I buy tickets?" He looked at her questioningly.

"Of course not! I'll get you them for free." Kirstie replied immediately, it sounded like Kevin had been such a good friend to Avi throughout the years that he deserved a treat. They weren't supposed to give out tickets to everyone, it was a mutual agreement throughout the cast that they should be used sparingly for special occasions but Kirstie was certain she could get them in. A Tony award went a long way when it came to asking for things, and besides, she would consider their date a special occasion. "We have a family and friend box at our show so just let me know the day and I'll sort you out. I should be able to get any day since it's not summer anymore but I'd still avoid Fridays if you can."

He looked over at her doubtful and she knew he didn't believe his luck. "Are you sure?"

"Perfectly, sorry your limited to choice but I promise you we put on a good show." She smiled at him, content that she could do something good to such an important guy in Avi's life.

If there was one thing Kevin was known for it was being humble and Kirstie was quickly beginning to realise it.

"Thank you so much. Oh my goodness that's so kind of you." He looked genuinely pleased and shocked that she would do that for him.

"Don't worry about it, it's not like I'm buying them for you, we get them for free." She tried to pass it off, not being able to get over how grateful he was. It was refreshing to her and made her feel special but she also found it odd, there weren't many people in New York who would act like that over free theatre tickets.

"Oh my, she will love it. Thank you!" He looked completely beholden to her.

"Also - don't hold me to this yet as I don't know if I can get extra tickets, my best friend Mitch is holding a fashion show/gala thingy with sounds super exciting and chic. If I can get more invites, would you like some?" She didn't want to come across as trying too hard to impress him, she genuinely wanted to help him out and from the look of his reaction, he really appreciated it.

He grinned at her and shook his head, chuckling to himself. "I love that Avi's dating you, do you know that?"

"I'll take that as a yes then." Kirstie beamed back. She knew this was only the beginning of a long friendship between the two of them.


	23. I Won't Let Go

"Hey Kirst, I need to get something from the roof, will you help me?" Mitch mumbled as he strutted around his apartment, looking for the certain coat he was wanting to wear. They were only going for a short trip up to the roof but still Mitch had to look good. Kirstie had no idea what he could possibly want from up there, it was pretty much empty - she would know from her numerous trips up there with Avi. Maybe something had been put up there since the last time she had been, it had been a month after all, plenty of things could change in that time.

It was Halloween and that meant the infamous Grassi's Annual Spookfest would be held that night at a hotel's ballroom across the city. She had only been once before when she had just met Mitch so she had missed out of the panic that was Mitch pre-party therefore seeing him in that state for the first time was hilarious. His parents had elected him as the chief party organiser since he had the best style out of all of them which meant Mitch had been running around the city all day to make sure all the pieces were coming together. It was a Saturday which meant that Kirstie had two shows so unfortunately her and Scott got to miss out on most of the fun of seeing a frazzled Mitch (he got even more sassy and funny when stressed) and they would even have to come to the party late but they didn't really mind that, it meant they missed out on seeing all the important and unfriendly guests that Mitch had been forced to invite. For Kirstie it also meant less time at the party dateless.

Avi had not been in touch much the past week, she had received a text now and then to update her on how he was and what he was up to but there had been no calls, no video chat, no mention on whether he would return to her. Kirstie was beginning to think maybe Kevin had been wrong, maybe this was Avi's way of shaking her off so they didn't have a terrible break up.

"Sure... what do you have up there anyway?" Kirstie forced cheerfulness as she replied, Avi's absence had been really getting her down and Mitch would clock her for it every time she let it show. She knew he only did it because he cared but it was beginning to get annoying, she didn't really want to talk about it as speaking of him only made her feel worse and Mitch was very, very persistent.

"Just some stuff." Mitch sang as he came back into the room with a jacket that probably cost more than her apartment.

"Okay?" Kirstie muttered confused, the responsibility of planning a party had made Mitch act really shady. She pulled on her own coat and followed him to the door of his apartment. It took him a while to figure out how to open it since he hardly ever used it, as he had the penthouse he had the privileged of being able to get the elevator straight up to his apartment.

The wind hit them as soon as Mitch pulled open the heavy door to the roof. Kirstie shivered the instant the crisp air met her skin, as a Texas native, she knew she would never get used to New York's fall temperatures. Mitch held the door open for her as she walked out of the roof but he didn't follow her. Instead he just smirked at her and reached down to the floor to find something to prop the door open.

"What are you doing?" She giggled uncomfortably, she was beginning to believe Mitch's power over the planning of the party must have sent him delirious. Mitch just smirked and pointed behind her before turning flawlessly on his heels.

"Um, Mitch?" She called after him nervously as she walked back towards the door. If this was Mitch's artistic way of telling her she was annoying him, she wasn't a fan. Just when she was about to yank the door open once more, she heard the clearing of someone's throat behind her and a shiver ran down her back. Great, Mitch must of been part of a murder plot.

However, when she turned around to meet the culprit of the noise, she wasn't brutally murdered, or kidnapped, instead she was pleasantly surprised. She couldn't believe he was there in front of her, she'd been without him for so long that she couldn't believe her eyes. Her mouth hung agape as she took him in, checking to see if her was real and not some sick trick of Mitch's. Avi was standing in front of her, looking as handsome as the day she went to meet him on the train when she wasn't supposed to. But more importantly, Kirstie could see he looked healthy. The bags that had taken up residence under his eyes were significantly less than the last time she saw him, the colour had returned to his cheeks which Kirstie was sure wasn't just to do with being exposed to the cold weather, and he looked content, happy even.

He nervously dropped his head when he saw her staring at him and began to play with a stone on the ground, unable to look at her just in case she was angry. "Hey... I mis-uffh."

His speech was cut off by the blonde slamming into him and pulling him into her arms. He chuckled at her sudden unexpected force and pulled his arms out of her vice like grip on him and wrapped his arms around her. Avi savoured the feeling of holding her close once more and for a second he forgot why he had even left her, his place was there with her, by her side.

"It's so good to see you," she pulled away to beam up at him, forgiving him almost instantaneously for leaving her. She didn't care about the worry he had caused her, all that mattered was he was back there with her.

"You too, babe." He mumbled as he leaned down to kiss her gently, relishing the taste of her lips against his after their absence.

She loosened her arms a little so she no longer had her Boa Constrictor like grip on him and pulled her lips away knowing that what the two needed most was to talk. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too." Avi muttered slowly after he recovered from the unsatisfactory absence of her lips.

"So is that it then? Are you back for good?" She bit her lip and glanced up at him hopefully, she got the feeling that his spontaneous appearance was a positive one from the involvement of Mitch but then again, stranger things had happened. Kirstie didn't know what she would do if he left her again, being away from him for two weeks had been bad enough, she didn't want to think what it would be like with no communication.

He swallowed before answering, knowing the monumental nature of reveal to her the results of his rehabilitation. "Yeah...well until Hanukah." He pressed his lips together in a smile and watched as her face was overcome with relief at his news.

It had been hard, he wouldn't sugar coat it for her. There were moments he thought he should never come back, moments of weakness when he would search something on Twitter, but then he remembered his love for her and knew what had to be done. Avi hadn't intended to fall off the face of the earth but he found that seeing her texts, Kevin's texts, even Esther's, got him down, reminding him of the pain he was causing them from not being near to them, haunted him. When he wasn't in the best frame of mind (which had regrettably been quite a lot in the weeks he was away) he would dwell on the fact he had hurt them, believing that even when he tried to get better for them he just made them feel worse. He didn't miraculously feel better over night but gradually, thanks to the help of his mom's cooking and plenty of lonesome long walks, he had come to his senses again. He wasn't fully back to normal, there was still the odd twinge of hatred for himself whenever he saw a mean comment but he was back where he belonged and he knew the beautiful women in his arms would help him take that last step.

"You know you could have just met me at Mitch's instead of freezing here on the roof." She smirked at him, pulling away completely and crossed her arms to brace herself from the cold air.

"Where would be the fun in that?" Placing his hands in his jeans pockets to keep them warm, he grinned at her, recalling why he had planned to meet her on the roof.

Kirstie rolled her eyes at his dorky remark and replied with a amused smile on her face. "True."

"And anyway I wanted to do something special for you since I've practically been AWOL for two weeks." He began to walk away from her to lead her over to his set up but the hand she gently place on his arm kept him in place.

Her eyes were filled with sympathy when he turned around to look at her and all the joy had left her face. She was reminded by his words that he was damaged, she had forgotten what he had gone through momentarily from the excitement of seeing him again. "You don't have to, I understand why you left."

Avi sighed and turned himself towards her, there was so many things they needed to discuss before they went back to normal and he knew this was only the start. "Yeah but I didn't have to, I should have stayed."

"We both know you'd be worse off if you did." Kirstie stared at him intensely, making him give in and admit he needed to leave the city for a bit.

"Yeah..." He agreed under his breath before smiling at her, hoping to get back to his plan. "Anyway, come with me."

Reaching out to grab her hand, he pulled her towards the other side of the roof squeezing her hand as he went like he was trying to keep her there with him, like if he let go for only a second they'd be apart again. He heard her giggle a little as he saw what he had created, there were blankets on the floor in front of the wall of her roof to break the wind, his guitar and two Starbucks cups weighing them down.

"Yeah I recreated our first date... you know so we can start over again?" He chuckled at his own cheesiness but stopped when he didn't hear her reply. Immediately he assumed her silence was due to the fact he had clearly been into her apartment without telling her. "I hope you don't mind that I broke into your apartment, well Mitch gave me the key so I didn't exactly break in. I'm surprised you didn't heard Toto squealing when I walked in the door..."

She squeezed his hand to get him to stop rambling and turned to face him with a massive grin upon her face. "I love it."

Like a small child he returned the grin and raised his eyebrows out of happiness. "Oh and this is for you so you don't freeze to death. It should really be wine - that way it would be more authentic but I don't want you to be tipsy for your show." Releasing his hand from hers, he picked up the drinks he had bought from Starbucks and handed her usual order to her.

"Thank you." She blushed, happy to be treated like a princess. He was really trying to make the moment right and meaningful, the feeling that someone (let alone a man as great as Avi) would do that for her made her feel all warm and fuzzy.

"It's the least I could do, I've even brought my guitar if you want me to sing for you." He gestured behind him as he led her to sit down on the blanket.

She shook her head as she she began to sat down. "I think I'll let you drink your tea first. You look freezing, how long have you been up here?"

Once he had joined her on the floor, he wrapped the other blanket round the both of them and wrapped his arm around her waist to share her warmth in the cold. He turned his head to give her a quick peck on the cheek and mumbled into her hair, "Only about ten minutes, my flight got in about two hours ago."

"Thanks for the warning." She scoffed as she took a sip of the coffee he had bought her.

"I'm sorry, I wanted it to be a surprise. Should I have told you?" He pulled away and looked at her carefully to read her emotions, he assumed she would have liked the surprise but then again he really should have told her he was coming back, she was probably worried sick.

"Avi don't worry, I'm just happy you are here now." She moved a hand to his thigh to reassure him with more contact. "And new rule, stop apologising. If we are starting over again you need to let things go." She nudged his shoulder playfully with her own, just like she had done a few months previously.

"Okay, deal." He bumped her back.

Kirstie sighed and rested her head on his shoulder. "I have to go do my show in about an hour," She mumbled sadly. She would give anything in the world to stay there with him but she knew her understudy had wanted the night off for her own Halloween plans, it would be cruel of her to cancel and dump everything on her.

"Well luckily for you Scott got me a ticket so I'll be there." Avi smirked at her, knowing the announcement would freak her out.

"What?!" She snapped away from him to look at him in shock. He had never been to one of her shows before, he had never even shown any interest in coming to watch her. It had upset her at first as she just figured Broadway wasn't one of his interests but as she had gotten to know him she had realised the reason he didn't want to go was because he didn't want to be in a room where he could possibly be near some of the people who had harassed them.

He grinned at her proudly, it had taken a lot of courage for him to call up Scott and ask for tickets, he didn't expect there to be any left but apparently no one wanted to go see a show on Halloween. "Yep, and I'm coming to Mitch's afterward so you better get changed fast."

"Are you telling me to go meet fans at the stage door?" Kirstie asked slowly, unsure of what he was implying.

The smirk dropped from his face. "Maybe..."

"Hmm I'll think about it." She hadn't been to greet fans at the stage door since her fame had grow too big too fast. The thought of doing it was daunting to her, she loved getting praise (who didn't) but she didn't want the questions they would ask, especially regarding her relationship status. The whole situation in itself was overwhelming, she didn't need awkward questions on top of it.

"I'll be there with you if you want." Avi smiled at her lovingly before reaching out to pull him back towards him and the blanket.

As she got settled in his lap and he wrapped his arms and the blanket around her, she was relieved to be back in his warmth once more. It felt reassuring to be in his arms, it made her feel like she could do anything, like she could walk out of the stage door that night and meet all the people there to see her with a smile on her face. "What if someone says something to you?"

"They won't - well not to my face at least."

"Are you sure?" She mumbled as she began to play with his newly trimmed beard, framing his face with her hands.

"Perfectly." She could tell by the peaceful look on his face that he meant it.

It was his agreement to do something he wouldn't have dared to even think of only weeks before that she knew he was finally over all the problems that came with her fame, he was ready to move on, for their relationship to develop like a relationship should do.

Pulling his face towards her's, she kissed him fully and pulled away grinning. "I'm so glad you are back." They both know she meant that in both a literal and metaphorical sense.

"Me too." He chuckled at the sudden spur of affection from his girlfriend. "I've got some news too."

"Oh, is it good?" The apprehensive look on her face was back once more, since their fight all those weeks ago, she had gotten it every time he needed to tell her something. It was as if she was she frightened he would end their relationship every time he had something to tell her.

He took a swig of his tea before replying to her. "I'd say so. When I was back home I went to visit my old music teacher and he got me in touch with some music producers here in the city. He got me an internship with them." He finished with a grin to indicate to her that this was a good thing for him.

However, Kirstie had scrunched up her face in confusion. It wasn't that she was unhappy for him for getting the opportunity but it had come as a bit of a shock. "A producer? I always thought you wanted to be a performer."

"I do but it's a foot in the door I guess. Networking and all. Maybe they'll like my music but if not it could still lead to a well paying job." He rambled at her until her expression changed from one of confusion to one of contentment.

"You don't need money to impress me Avi." It was true, she would love him even if he was homeless.*

"I know but I would kinda like to stop relying on Esther, and to maybe move out..." He trailed off, daydreaming of what else he would do with a little more money. Treat Kirstie like she deserved to be treated was also high on the list, he would do anything to buy her some expensive jewellery that was as pretty as she was.

"You could move in with me?" She asked quietly, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. She'd been wanting that for a while but the absence of him from her apartment altogether had made her wish for it more, she never wanted to be away from him. She craved a domestic life with him, to bicker over who would cook, to go grocery shopping together, to know he would share her bed every night. It was a dream she wished would come true.

"What? Really? We've haven't even been together 2 months." Avi stated in shock. It wasn't that he didn't want to move in with her, he just wanted to do it when he was a little more stable, he wanted to be able to contribute to things instead of just relying on her for everything.

"Yeah, you're right. Bad idea." She sighed and placed her head-on his chest, he was right. While she wanted it to happen, if they rush into things their relationship could fall apart and they had been too close to that already happening for her to want to risk it again.

"I mean I could wait at Esther's a bit and then move in?" He suggested slowly, not wanting her to think he hated the idea of them living together. He truly wanted to but not right then, not when they had only just gotten back to enjoying their relationship.

"I'd like that," She beamed at him, overjoyed to know the idea of sharing a living space was still on the cards. "My apartment lease runs out in February so we can decide then."

"It's a plan." He grinned at her and placed a kiss on her forehead.

She turned to him excitedly. "I have news too."

"Oh really?" He raised his eyebrows at her and grinned at her adorableness.

"I've started auditioning again... I know I swore I wouldn't but I guess I couldn't keep away from the theatre." Kirstie smirked at her own indecisiveness. Until she had met Avi and for a little while afterwards, she was certain she was going to retire from performing as soon as her current contact was up, she had started to hate it and all that came with it but since Avi had brightened up her life and was their to support her, she had begun to love acting once more.

"Seems like me leaving actually did us both good." He murmured, admitting out loud for the first time that his trip had been a much needed decision.

"Exactly, now play for me Mr. Soon-To-Be-Big-Shot!" She bounced out of his lap and tugged the blanket off of him and around her.

"As my lady commands." He chuckled as he stood up, shocked at the sudden loss of warmth and stumbled over to his guitar.

There was no need to tune it since he had only done it twenty minutes before and begun to play. Smiling, he remembered that this was just how they started, him singing love songs about her on the train and that one time he played for her on that very roof which lead to their perfect first kiss. Things were looking up again, that familiar warm, happy feeling he got when being with her was back once more and he was excited about what to come. She was completely worth every single mean comment, she was worth him having to go through so much emotional pain. Being with her made him feel alive and he hoped to God he'd never loose that feeling again, he wouldn't be able to cope if he did.


	24. All is Well

Halloween had been perfect for the couple, it had been the special night they were hoping for to rekindle their romance. He had come to her performance and had loved every single second of it. He was so proud of her for being that talented, she was fantastic and she was beautiful but more importantly she was still his. Avi had no clue how he had managed to pull through his sorrow without losing her, if he was her he would have broken up with him in a heartbeat but she didn't, she was the better person, she loved him, all his insecurities included. He couldn't believe how lucky he was, to find a girl he was head over heels for and for them to fall in love together in such a short amount of time. She was perfect, she was his perfect little thing, the person he wanted to fall asleep with each night, the person he knew he should marry. But that was far off in their future and a lot could happen in that time that could prevent that so all that mattered in that moment was that they were there for each other, that he reluctantly bit the bullet and waited for her at the stage door knowing he would be recognised by the more dedicated of her fans.

He was recognised in an instant, in a matter of seconds he had a couple of nervous teenage fans come and ask him for a picture while confused onlookers who weren't big fans of Kirstie's wondered which celebrity he was. He watched as she worked the crowd, taking pictures with whoever asked, responding calmly to the people who asked some not very nice questions, smiling at every compliment she got. Kirstie was a natural, her years as a performer had taught her the most effective way to work a crowd and she was certainly using her training to woo them. The entire time, Avi had felt some glares coming his way, especially when Scott had stepped out and reminded them all of what what could have been, the fan made love the was 'Scirstie'. He knew they wouldn't dare say anything to them so he tried not to let him affect him but they did, the feeling of him not being wanted had irked him yet he withstood it, knowing that he had to toughen up in order to stay with the girl of his dreams.

"Who am I making it out to?" He didn't realise that Kirstie was standing in front of him until he felt her grab his hand and look up at him with a smirk.

"Umm the most handsome guy in the world." She giggled and begun to write her signature on his hand, biting her tongue after a few letters to concentrate on spelling handsome correctly.

She finished her signature with a few kisses on the end, a privilege she reserved to only the most special of fans and put the cap back on her pen. "Well I have you know that Ryan Gosling does exist so maybe you will have to come a close second." She grimaced at the end in mock awkwardness.

"I'll take that." He grabbed her hands and pulled her closer to protect her from the cold air, knowing that there was a high chance of one risky fan taking some pictures of the two to post online. He didn't care though, he'd have to get use to the occasional invasion of privacy, it was the price he had to give to be with her. "Do you want to get going?"

"Yep. Thank you for meeting me here." She mumbled as the two began to walk away from the crowd, arms around each other and content that both of them had the nerve to do that in front of some of her fans.

"Anything for you." He leant in and kissed her cheek before nuzzling his nose there, making her giggle.

The journey back to her apartment was filled with his compliments about the show which made her blush for the entire ride home. She was relishing the fact he was back on the train with her, there was something so special about her trips home from the theatre that she had hated when he wasn't with her, one particularly emotional night she had even walked home, not being able to stand being on the night train without him. It was their place, their special place and she hoped she never stopped getting the tightening feeling in her stomach whenever she stepped foot on it.

Since he had planned ahead, he had dropped of his costume at her's when he had broken in to get the blankets so there was no need for the two to detour to his apartment. Avi watched as Kirstie quickly turned herself into some Japanese Anime character that he forgot the name of and was weirded out by the sight of her in a brightly coloured wig and odd looking contacts. They would definitely have to go or he would have to get drunk before they kissed again, it would feel completely foreign to him to lean in to kiss her knowing that her eyes were not the same. When she had finished, she grinned excitedly because she knew it was time for his torture. After asking him nicely earlier on in the night, Avi had reluctantly agreed to let her turn him into a 'Californian werewolf in New York' as she had dubbed it. He already had enough hair already but somehow she managed to make it look like her had more, his hair was messed up and she made sure his ripped shirt showed practically all of his chest hair although part of him was sure she had only done that for her own pleasure. She only stopped when Toto walked into her bathroom and started to bark at him, confused at who the stranger was, she knew her transformation of him was complete.

They didn't stay at the party as long as they had planed, opting out about an hour and a half after they had arrived to return back to her apartment for some time alone. The small time they spent at the party had been a fun but intense one complete with Scott tipsily threatening Avi never to leave again. They danced, they drunk, they mingled, they posed for a photo whenever someone asked, playing the part of a couple in love perfectly. The first time they attempted to leave they made the mistake of telling people and Mitch, clad in about half of his Sponge Bob outfit as he had some how through the course of the night lost the rest, had grabbed onto Avi and Kirstie and begged them not to leave so they didn't. The expertly chose to slip out the next time to avoid the 'Keep Kavi Here Mob' as Scott had called it, they knew that instead people would think they had escape to some back room to make out or do other things but they didn't really care, the next few weeks of teasing was worth being alone for a few hours.

Normally, when the two had them had left parties together before they'd be all over each other the moment they entered her apartment but neither of them felt the need for it that night. Of course they both craved being intimate again but there were more important things to do than to go at each other, showing the other physically how much they loved the other. Kirstie still hadn't a clue just what he had done in California and neither of them knew what they would do next. Even though things were fine between the two for now, it didn't mean the chaos that had come with their relationship had stopped. They still needed a plan of action to tackle those haters for good but first, they needed to shower of the grime and makeup from the party.

Avi followed her to her bathroom as she removed her contacts and wig making him breath a sigh of relief when he saw her almost back to normal. She begun to remove her clothes in front of him before stepping into the shower, not caring that she was giving him a good view of her body. Not wanting to leave her, Avi quickly striped off his clothes as Kirstie fiddled with the shower controls and stepped in behind her. Slowly, she turned to face him as the warm water cascaded over them and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, holding him close. As his hair stuck to his forehead, his arms snaked their way around and he dipped his head down to rest upon her shoulder, basking in the fact he could hold her close once more. Being in the privacy of the shower and in an intimate embrace she let her tears fall for the first time she he'd left. She'd managed to keep them in for the last few weeks, know that if they fell, they would never stop and she needed to be strong for him even though he hadn't been with him. It was like they were still connected even though they were at different ends of the country, she felt like she had be the tough one as he needed a rock, someone to cling on to. However now he was happily stable once more, it was her turn to need him.

Her sobs ran deep through her, making her chest rise and fall violently against him out of the sheer force of emotion that was erupting out of her. She had been holding it all in for so long that it was a mixture of emotions ranging from anger at him for almost giving up on her to sadness that he'd left her alone for so long. Foremost, there was a feeling of relief, relief that he was back in her arms once more, relief that he was willing to fight for them, relief that he was once again happy in her company. She clung to him for dear life as she felt him press a kiss into her shoulder, comforting her as she let it all out. Kirstie suddenly became conscious that she was crying uncontrollably in front of him and was grateful for the sound of the water slamming against their bodies as it masked the sound of her weeping. Her grip on him tightened when she noticed he wasn't crying with her, just weeks ago seeing her in this state would have deeply upset him to the point he would probably leave her apartment with heaver tears that her but he'd changed now, he'd got better and she was so proud of him.

"Never leave me again." She mumbled through her tears, her voice wavering on every word.

"I don't want to." He replied weakly and squeeze her a little harder, letting her know he was feeling the pain too. Even though he had grown a better tolerance towards the emotions they had gone through, it still hurt him to see her like that, to see the person he had been relying on for so long be overcome with feelings. He wanted to cry along with her but he knew what she needed more was someone to be strong for her, to carry her through it and he was determined to be that person for her.

After a while of just holding each other, Avi reached out behind her and turned off the shower, not wanting to make her water bill sky high. As he moved back to her, she caught his face in between her hands and begun to push the wet hair off of his forehead, admiring him though a wall of tears. "Do you think it's over now?" She whispered, sounding more feeble than he had ever hear her speak.

"I think so." He leaned in to kiss her gently, lovingly. Then he pulled away from her completely, murmuring that he needed to wash the gel out of his hair. The loss of contact was felt by the both of them and even though they both knew he needed to get clean, neither of them wished to for her to move out of the shower. They just stood there, staring at each other, unsure who was going to make the first move.

Eventually she sighed and pulled back the shower curtain to step out, careful not to get any limbs stuck in his and cause them both to trip. "We still need to do something about all the mean comments, there's even a photoshop mugshot of you floating around." She giggled, trying to make her self feel better by convincing her mind it was a laughing matter. It didn't work.

He quickly ran the shampoo through his hair and turned the shower on lightly to wash it all off. "Oh that's real." He called over the water.

"What?" She snapped her head back towards the shower as she pulled a towel around her to protect her body from the sudden cold of her apartment.

She heard the shower turn off and he poked his head round the curtain, reaching out for a towel before stepping out. Seeing the worried look on her face he exhaled deeply and made his way over to her. "Don't worry, the charges were dropped. Someone started on me randomly in a club and I retaliated because who wouldn't. Then the police came, we both got arrested for assault and I had to spend a night in a cell. It was awful, seriously never get arrested."

She was relieved, she would have hated to find out there that he'd been keeping a criminal record a secret from her for so long. "How did you get out of it though?"

After securing the towel around his waist, he placed his hands lightly on her arms as he needed desperately to come into contact with her again after such an private moment. "It was caught on camera thank God, I got some money on top of it for compensation."

"Well...I think we should add that to things we need to tell people." She murmured as she begun to dry herself, staying as close to him as she could.

"That list is getting really long now." He chuckled sadly, there was too many things now that they kept private that they shouldn't have. In a perfect life, their secrets would be untouched, left between the two of them but with her being in the public eye, they had had no chance of trying to keep things that way.

"About that, Scott made a suggestion to me the other week that I kinda liked the sound of." She said nervously, turning away from him to grab the shirt he had left there earlier when he changed into his costume.

He looked at her apprehensively and begun to dry off himself. Even though he adored Scott, his ideas, while usually genius, were occasionally out there and very adventurous. "Go on..."

"He said maybe we should do a live stream or a Periscope or something and just do a Q&A to get everything out in the open." She turned back to face him, doing up the buttons on the shirt and walked closer to him, watching his expression carefully.

"Oh...that sound's okay?" He was expecting something a little more abstract than that so his idea seemed doable. He was sure he could suffer through that for her, he'd be completely uncomfortable but at least it meant it would get everything out in the open.

Her tears were only just being to subside but there was still an occasional snuffle from her. "Really? I thought you would hate the idea." She observed him closely as she wrapped the towel around her hair, she was a little shocked that he had agreed to it and she was beginning to wonder what other things Avi would be willing to do now he had gotten over whatever was holding him back.

"I do." There was little things would he hate more than an awkward conversation to a camera but one of those things would be to know he had lost her so it was the better option.

"Then why didn't you say so?" She crossed her arms across her chest and cocked her head, confused with his behaviour.

"Because not telling people got us into this mess, I think I'd be willing to change techniques for you, for us even."

Upon hearing his response, she wrapped her arms around him once more and smiled into his neck, the Avi she fell in love with really was back. "Shall we do it tomorrow then? I'll tweet it now."

"Sure." He muttered as she pulled away from him and begun to collect the washing to put in the hamper in her room.

"Kirstie?" He called after her as she begun to leave the room.

"Yeah?" She glanced back over her shoulder and stopped dead in her tracks.

Avi didn't think he'd ever get used to how beautiful she was, even standing in only his shirt, a towel around her head with no makeup and swollen eyes, she looked phenomenal to him. "I love you... truly." He somehow managed to stammer out and felt his heart grow warm at the sight of the smile that broke out on her face.

"I love you too." She replied sincerely. Neither of them wanted to live a life where they no longer said that to each other.


	25. Unbreakable

"Bye guys, I love you!" Kirstie sung, blowing a kiss into the camera of her laptop which she was imagining to be the people who were watching them. Avi sat awkwardly next to her, giving an uncomfortable wave as Kirstie showed affection to her adoring fans. They had been live streaming from the comfort of her apartment for the last half an hour and to say Avi had disliked every minute of it would be an understatement. He absolutely hated it, to him there was nothing natural about speaking to a camera while imagining it to be hundreds of people judging their every move but he had stomached it, for her. He hated that they had to let people into their private lives, even though they had only told her fans the bear essentials, he felt uncomfortable that they knew things. Before long it will come second nature to him just like it already was for her, he knew he would get used to it but he was going to loath every second until it did.

He sighed in relief as she exited the stream and closed down her laptop, turning to face him with a big grin on her face. At least one of them enjoyed it. She was a people person, he wasn't and he was sure that had rung clear in the stream.

"Well that went better than expected..." He mumbled, he had expected it to be the worse mistake of his life, he expected there to be so many mean comments that they had to turn it off but they hadn't, everyone had been surprisingly civil.

She playfully slapped his arm to stop his negativity and begun to bounce a little on the bed. "They loved you!"

"Yeah but did they love me enough to stop the mean comments?" That's all he cared about. They needed to solve that problem, it was the one thing that was putting pressure on their relationship, the one thing that had sent him off the tracks. They needed for it to be sorted before they could have any chance of making it.

Getting up from the bed, Kirstie moved to place her laptop on the small desk in the corner of her room. "I don't know, why don't you have a look? They will never stop altogether but hopefully that would reduce the amount of them."

He had already loaded up twitter before she had said it. Searching his name just like he had done more times than he cared to admit he was surprised to find it wasn't overwhelmed with hostility as usual. There was still the odd mean comment about him but the vast majority had been neutral, nice even.

"You did so well though babe. Thank you for doing that for me." She bounded over to him playfully and gave him a peck on the cheek.

"I'd do anything for you." Avi smiled, looking up from his phone to gaze at her lovingly. Her goofy grin was so contagious it put a smile on his face, he loved her so much. He wanted to be with her forever, to wake up every morning to see that familiar grin; where they belonged was side by side. 

Avi made a mental note to write that down. 

Unbeknownst to his girlfriend, he had gradually begun to write original music, primarily using her and their love as a muse. He had started when the he had gone back home, finding it easier to clear his mind by writing it down. There was something so therapeutic about putting thought into music, it helped calm him, it helped to remember his love for her when he was at his lowest. He figured that originals was the next step for him, since his relationship with her had made his music grow in popularity he knew that was what people were expecting of him, it was what he expected of himself.

Kirstie shifted to lean against him, placing her hand on top of his phone to reclaim his attention and mumbled into his shoulder. "Do you think that's it now then?"

Moving his phone to the table next to the bed, her settle down further against the headboard, pulling her tightly against him. "What's it?"

"All these problems, do you think they are over now?" Her hands found his, playing with his fingers, soothing them both.

He wanted to say yes (who wouldn't), but he couldn't bring him self to lie to her, he hadn't a clue what the rest of their relationship will bring them. "Who knows what the future will bring but right now, I'm pretty certain we are unbreakable."

"It's so weird how much things can change in a year. Like just months ago we weren't talking and now look at us!" She giggled, pressing a light kiss into his neck before moving away from him to get a better view of her boyfriend.

"Everything happens for a reason." He smirked back at her. Despite the horror that had come with some parts of their relationship, the last few months had been the best few of his life, they even bet his years in college where he was young and full of the promise of success. He had found her, he had fallen in love, she had loved him back - it had been magical. He'd do it all again in a heartbeat, even the days where he hated himself, she was worth ever second of it.

"Even this?" She looked him with a wild look in her eyes complete with a mischievous grin and he knew straight away what torture was going to be induced upon him.

"Kirstie - don't you dare." Avi warned, his eyes wide. His girlfriend advanced on him, arms out ready to strike and when she did, he begun to howl with laughter. "Kirst - ahh." His words came out as more of whelping than speech as she attacked his sides with her fingers. Slowly, she made her way upwards towards a weaker spot and he desperately grasped at the sheets to try and get away from her. 

Somehow, through her pursuit of him and his needy attempts to move away from her, they had ended up near the foot of the bed, Avi on his side, curled up like a cat in the bid to make it harder for her to attack him. Looking down at his pained face yet hearing his familiar laugh erupting from him that she had not heard in a while, she begun to giggle herself and stopped her offence, happy with the result. They were finally getting back to normal.

Before he could realise she had stopped and begun to plan his own attack, Kirstie pushed him onto his back, climbing on top of him to hold him in place and grabbed his tensed arms to pin them above his head so he couldn't retaliate. Once he had recovered and understood what was happening, he grinned up at her delighted at where this was going and moved his hips underneath her, prompting her to make a move since he couldn't. 

Feeling him eagerly writhing below her, she smirked down at him and leaned in closer. She moved closer until she was just inches away from his lips, teasing him with the proximity between them, her breath against his face as she whispered flirtatiously. "Yep, I think that happened for a very good reason indeed."

Finally she gave him what he wanted - what they both wanted, leaning down further so their chests' were flat against each other and then capturing his lips with hers. She was surprised at first how passionate he returned the kiss, she hadn't felt him kiss her like that in weeks, not since the night of their run in with Chase before they were rudely interrupted. They both craved each other, needing to rekindle the feeling of being intimate with each other after such a long time.

"Mhhm - agreed." He managed to stutter out in between kisses. As soon as her grip on his wrist loosened from the heat of the kiss, he tugged them free and made quick work of moving her hair aside so he could move down to her neck, making sure to take extra care with his kisses at the certain spot that made her weak. His impatience made her laugh, anyone would have thought they hadn't been together in years let alone weeks but she understood him, she felt it too though she was less obvious about it. Even though they had only had been in a rough patch for a few weeks, it had felt like lifetimes. It was like they had waited eternities just to be together again and they both were desperate to pick up where they left off, a firm reminder that they had made it through those problems. Their issues had only made them want it more, the closer they got to loosing each other, the more they realised how much the other meant and how much they loved being with them.

He wasn't sure what he would have done if he had lost her in the short time they had had together. Kirstie was his whole life now, and without her, he'd be nothing. He'd have to return to being a busker, a nobody who played songs for strangers on trains. She had given him love, a person to call his in just a short space of time and he couldn't believe this luck. Meeting her on the train had changed his life, it had been a rocky road but the end was worth it, being with her was worth it. Thank God for the East Side Line, without it he wouldn't be able to love her.


	26. New York City

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eleven Month Time Jump.

New York in the transition from summer to fall was by far Avi Kaplan's favourite version of the city. It was the only time in the city where things actually appeared to slow down, the summer tourists had left with all the 'I Heart NY' merchandise they could dream of and the flocks of people coming to see New York at winter had not yet arrived. For a brief moment of the year, the city was just for the residents; bundles of small children starting school, many business workers started new quarterlies, the fact they could walk around Manhattan and not be asked directions to Times Squire or the Empire State. Avi loved the freedom that came with September in New York but he only fell in love with that time of year because that was when he met her.

The previous year felt like a lifetime away, he had been broke then, a nobody, a loveless man but all that changed the moment she stepped foot on the train that Monday night so long ago. She had forced him to reassess his life, taught him that life wasn't easy but that didn't mean you had to stop fighting, showed him how wonderful love truly is. Without her he'd still be a loser living off of his sister's money and still feeling too defeated to change that. She had inspired him to change his ways and it was clear from the past year he had and had changed them dramatically.

His job at the record company turned out to be one of the best decisions of his life. After months of leaving CDs on his bosses desk and grinding work, doing menial tasks such as making coffees for people who didn't even know his name, he finally got somewhere, someone finally recognised him. The moment he got signed to the label he was overjoyed, the dreams that had drove him to come to the city finally coming true. It was surreal, years of dreaming had finally become his reality and for a short time after that he didn't believe his luck.

That day he officially quit his work in order to focus on his new music career. He had found out the day before that he had been signed and naturally he had rushed to his girlfriend's apartment to catch her before she made her way to the theatre to tell her the good news. She was ecstatic. Her boyfriend was finally moving on up in the world, finally achieving his dreams, she couldn't be prouder. She made him stay at her apartment while she to work, jokingly threatening him with no kisses for a week if he moved even an inch out of her apartment. When she got back, she made quick time of showing him just how proud of him she was and he had turned up to collect his things from his work that morning with a dreamy smile plastered on his face.

The train back to her's wasn't as busy as usual, it was late morning so everyone was either at work or still in bed so he got quite a fright when he felt someone press up against him from behind. His first thought was that some stranger had decided to get a little touchy feely with him and then he thought it was Mitch pulling a prank on him but then he remembered that Mitch wouldn't be seen dead on the subway. His anxieties were quelled when he felt the familiar feeling of Kirstie's arms wrapping around him and a glance down at the hands complete with the usual rings she wore confirmed his suspicions. He didn't expect her to surprise him, he didn't expect her to be on the train, he was sure all her displays of how pleased she was for him were finished. How she managed to navigate herself to onto the correct train and carriage he had no clue but somehow she did (he suspected she was following him the entire time).

"Hey Mr. Big-Shot." She giggled into his back and squeezed him a little tighter which earn her a chuckle from him. She taken to calling him that ever since he first told her of his internship, she enjoyed to remind him he was succeeding in his career after years of getting nowhere. She especially enjoyed calling him it when she realised how much discomfort he seemed to display whenever he heard it, Kirstie loved to tease. He had grown used to it by the time he got signed though and the fact that her nickname for him was slightly true just made it even easier to stomach.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" He smirked, shifting the box in his arms to one side so he would be able to greet her when she finally decided to show herself.

"Oh I'm here completely on my own accord." She replied with a mocking business women like tone and spun around him until she was in front of him.

Grinning wide, he moved to place his free arm around her. "Well aren't I a lucky guy?"

"You really are." Kirstie mumbled reaching up to play with the stray pieces of hair that had fallen out of the bun he had haphazardly put up that morning. "Anyway, I've got a present for you!" She continued with a force of enthusiasm.

"Kirstie... you didn't have to give me anything." He moaned. She'd already given him more than enough the night before and there was even talks of her wanting to buy him a new guitar.

"No I didn't but I want to because you deserve it for being so fantastic... Well it's more like a present for the both of us so don't feel too guilty."

Immediately his mind deduced it was something sexual, it was the only thing he could think of that would benefit them both. Avi didn't really understand how she could give him that in a train though so his reply came out sounding incredibly unsure and nervous. "Oh really?"

"Yep! Now close your eyes and hold out your hand."

Succumbing to his girlfriend's demands, he moved his arm from around her and opened up his palm in between them, closing his eyes in the process. His theory of it being something for the bedroom was thrown out the window the moment he felt something small, metal and cold be placed in his hand.

"You can open them now!" Kirstie giggled and playfully tapped his arms, whatever it was she was incredibly excited to give him it.

It was a key. A copy of one he had seen her use many times before.

"Kirstie, you sure about this?" His voice was shaky, understanding the importance of what she was giving him.

She beamed up at him, bouncing a little and began to stroke his arms, trying to rub some of her excitement into him. "Totally! You said you wanted to wait until you started to earn more and we practically live together already so it's not like it's going to be a major change."

"What about Esther? I can't just leave her alone." He wanted to though, he wished more that anything to move in with Kirstie but he knew he'd much rather do it when they were both completely ready. Avi guessed that asking her that gave her one last chance to reject him, one last time to change her mind before it became final.

"It was her who suggested it actually. I think someone is planning on convincing Darien to move in with her..." Her eyebrows raised suggestively. It made sense to Avi that his sister wanted him out of their apartment. She payed most of the rent, she always cleaned up after him (not that he didn't do any house work, in fact he always went to do it only to find Esther had already done it), he occasionally brought Kirstie around to stay the night even though they had a rule. On top of all that, Darien and her were getting very serious, they'd been dating for much longer than Avi and Kirstie so he was surprised it had taken her so long to kick him out. In fact, Avi was adamant that a certain question would be proposed in the near future, they were that serious and that far in their relationship.

Finally beginning to give in to his wishes, he rolled his eyes, letting go of all his worries. "Oh so she totally wanted rid of me." He scoffed.

"Yeah, she was just so pissed off about us nearly going at it on that beloved couch of her's. She's probably been planning a way to get rid of you for months." Kirstie giggled once more, remembering the night very early on in their relationship when Esther had caught them on said couch and had moved them along to his room instead. It had become a running joke for her, whenever they showed any signs of affection in front of her she would joke about how at least they weren't on her couch. Esther meant it in jest, they all knew she did but it was obvious the joke had a lot of truth behind it. There was no shoes allowed on it, no food could be eaten in its vicinity and there certainly wasn't allowed to be any sex on it.

"She does love that couch..."

With a massive grin adorning her fav, she placed her hands on his shoulders hoping that it will encourage him to answer her question. "Well what do you say then? I've already signed the lease for another six months so you'll only have to pay me instead of my landlord, that way you don't have to worry about paying for the next few months, you know because you'll just be starting out."

"I don't know, it seems kinda unfair on you."

"Don't worry, I'll be demanding that money back asap." Kirstie smirked for a second before wrapping her arms fully around his neck and pulled him closer, peering at him with hopeful eyes. "Move in with me..."

"Hmmmm." He closed his eyes in thought. He already knew his answer, he was just teasing her.

"Please don't make me beg." Even though he was not looking at her he could tell she was pouting, he could hear it in her voice.

An amused smile appeared on his face as his eyebrows shot up and he opened up his eyes. "Well that not exactly a undesirable sight-"

"Avi!" She playfully slapped his arm.

"Fine." He grumbled knowing it would drive her crazy.

"Fine you will move in with me or fine you'll stop making sexual remarks in the middle of a train?" Kirstie whined, she was dying to hear his answer.

"Fine I'll move in with you, I can't promise anything about the second one..."

The noise that came out of her was unlike any he'd heard before from her. It was a squeal and it was so high he was sure it would attract any nearby dogs. Kirstie's body slammed into him with a thud as she yanked him closer to her, ecstatic that he had finally given her the answer she wanted. Truthfully, she'd been dying for him to move in with her from the moment she first proposed it on the roof all those months ago but she understood why he had been apprehensive about it. Moving in together was a big deal, it could make or break a relationship and doing it at the wrong time usually meant the latter. They both loved the other too much to risk it, so she waited until she could no longer think of any excuses why they shouldn't to ask him again.

"I suppose you'll be wanting me to go home to start packing straight away?" He chuckled into her hair, he always adored her when she was enthusiastic, she reminded him of a small child at Christmas or of a dog when it's owner returned, it was cute.

Pulling back, she started at him with big, thrilled eyes. "You betcha."

"Eugh... anything for you." He frowned and faked annoyance. He actually wanted nothing more than to be moved in with her as soon as possible.

"You never know Roomie, it might be worth your while later on..." She smirked at him, grabbing the box in his hand and stepping off the train before he had even realised it was the station he needed to get off at in order to get to Brooklyn. He stood there shocked for a moment at her sudden movement before he realised that he had only seconds to get off or else he would miss the stop completely. Somehow he managed to jump off just before the doors snapped closed much to Kirstie's amusement. He pulled her in for one more hug when he was safely on the platform, content that for once more in his life things looked hopeful.


	27. Love Me Again

Mitch Grassi had become a workaholic and a bitter one at that. He used to love the rush he got whenever he saw his designs made for the first time, he used to adore the feeling he got on the lead up to fashion week, he used to find the inner workings of the fashion industry one of the most interesting things in the world. Yet this year, even with the lead up to the notorious New York Fashion Week, he felt distant from it despite how much he threw himself into it. Things had changed for him in the past year, his work was now his distraction from his personal life and not the other way around as it should be. Mitch was confused and he hated it.

And Scott was the reason for this confusion, not because of something he had done instead was something he had failed to do and as a result of that Mitch had become very lost. The two of them had been flirting for the best part of two years, constantly making sexual remarks, always treating the other like a partner yet lately Scott had gone cold, lost interest even and Mitch's emotions were sent into disarray. They say that absence made the heart grow fonder and that was exactly what had happened in Mitch's case but that was what had confessed him, Mitch had always been the person to move on quickly, he never let himself get hung up over a guy but for some reason he had with Scott.

He had taken to hiding out at his work, avoiding all invitations by using the excuse of the upcoming Fashion Week. He could no longer stand hanging out with Scott, he only stomached to do so when they were filming for their channel but other than that he avoided him. Being alone with him just reminded him that they weren't the same anymore, they were no longer flirty messes around each other. He'd been avoiding Kirstie like the plague too, she and Avi moving in together must have reignited something between them and now the two were acting like they had done in the beginning, like annoying horny teenagers. Mitch was jealous, it didn't help that he was letting himself get down about Scott only then to see them being all adorable and all over each other. He was certain he was permanently scarred from walking in on them being a little too heavy in the kitchen one day. Mitch had kindly agreed to help move some boxes for Avi (well he was more like giving support) and he opened the door to find Kirstie up on the counter, clad only in his shirt with her legs dragged around his very shirtless waist. Clearly they were attempting to continue whatever had happened the night before and Mitch found it completely gross, choosing to clear his throat to make them drag themselves away from the other and pay attention to him. After that he refused to go back, at least until their newfound honeymoon period was over.

Surprisingly, the only person he could stand being around in that time was Avi's friend Kevin. They were an unlikely pair, the Saint and the Sinner, but for some reason it worked. They never had a flirty relationship so there were no flashbacks to what Scömìche was a few months previously, and him and his girlfriend always kept the PDA to a minimum unlike his best friend and his girlfriend. Mitch for some reason told him everything, every little thought in his head was spilled to Kevin, there was just something so trusting about his face that made Mitch want to do so and he always felt better for afterwards.

In fact, at that moment he was heading out to go and meet up with him at his apartment across river. Though he had become immersed in his work even Mitch realised he had to take a break and introducing Kevin to RuPaul sounded like an ideal way to spend the evening.

While he waited for his car to be brought round to the front of the building, his phone buzzed in his pocket and he knew it must be from Kevin, he was the only person who still texted him. Mitch barked off some orders to Mario on what he had to make sure was done while he was away (it was late, he was grouchy) and made a mental note to give him a bigger bonus at the end of the week before pulling his phone out of his pocket.

Kev: Hey, I'm just over at Kirstie and Avi's so I'll meet you at your's in about 10 minutes? Sorry for changing plans, Av needed help with something.

Mitch smiled at Kevin's thoughtfulness, he could have easily told him to meet him at Kirstie's but he knew all about the little problem he had with them and had decided to spare his feelings instead. Kevin was an angel and Mitch thanked Kirstie everyday for meeting Avi and bringing Kevin and him together.

It didn't take long for him to get to the apartment building, his driver was very well practiced at getting round the heavy traffic spots in New York and his work wasn't too far away from his home. It was a little later than the ten minutes that Kevin had suggested but Mitch was surprised to see that Kevin was not outside the door to his apartment like he thought he would be. Mitch had presumed that he would wait there for him since he wasn't able to take the elevator up but Kevin was nowhere in sight. He opened his door, assuming that Kirstie had just given him his spare key and was shocked to find his apartment was not how he had left it.

Immediately he was overwhelmed by he smell of rose scented candles that were currently burning on his dinning table and some slow jazz being played over his speakers in the corner of the room. Mitch dropped his bag onto the couch, mouth wide open as he looked around his apartment confused.

Kevin then came out of the kitchen with some empty wine glasses and humming along to the music. He glanced over at Mitch staring at him from his place beside the seating area and continued to walk until the gears in his mind finally all clicked together and he finally recognised that the person they had been waiting for was finally there.

"Hey Mitch! Avi's in the kitchen cooking, Kirstie's doing...something, hope you don't mind." Kevin brushed it off like them breaking into his apartment and cooking dinner was one of the most natural things on earth.

Mitch, finally regaining control over his voice, began to follow him towards the table and observed the elaborate set up that many restaurants would be envious of. "No, no it's fine. What's the occasion?"

"We just thought you deserved to have a special night you know, since you've been so busy about the fashion week." He called out as he quickly made his way back into the kitchen to retrieve the next item leaving Mitch to linger alone by the table.

"Aww thanks girl."

Silently, he began to have a browse of the table to try and get some idea what was going on. There was two places set up yet there were currently four people in his apartment. His first thoughts were that Kirstie and Avi had decided to have a romantic dinner in his apartment which would be weird, there was nothing about his penthouse that was romantic in the slightest. Then it dawned on him that Kevin brought him here, Kevin was the one who had changed the plans.

Mitch heard a shuffling coming from the kitchen and Kevin himself came through the door with a large wooden salad bowl in hand. Clearing his throat, Mitch thought it was best to let him down gently. "Erm, I'm flattered really but I think you've got the wrong end of the stick. I'm really not into you like that..."

"What?" Kevin looked over at him with a very bemused expression on his face as he placed the bowl on the table. Slowly, he cracked into laughter when he realised just what Mitch was thinking. "Oh no, no. That's not for me."

"Oh thank goodness." Mitch chuckled a little, Kevin's laugh always was infectious.

"Kavi?" He tried once more to get information out of his friend.

Kevin's laughter stopped abruptly and a look of panic can across his face. He had no idea what to reply, he didn't want to give the game away just yet so his pressured mind was forced to find a way out. "Yeah Avi, I'll come and help you in the er kitchen."

With the perfect timing that came with being a Broadway star, Kirstie waltzed into the room from the door to his bedroom and began to spray some kind of air freshener around the room. She smiled at him when she turned around and saw him but just like Kevin had before her a look of dread became resident on her face.

"Kirst what's going on?" Mitch replied sternly, Kirstie always had been the first one to crack under pressure.

"Errrrrr." She squeaked quietly, trying to find a good excuse but came up blank.

"Well that was helpful."

A knock from the door was heard throughout the apartment and Kirstie's head shot round to look over at it.

Her reply came fast and frantic as she begun to walk towards her boyfriend in the kitchen. "You should get the door... It's probably for you, you know it being your apartment and all why would it be for us it's just -"

"- I'll go get it if you stop rambling."

Mitch walked over to the door shaking his head at his friends' oddness, it was probably the doorman coming up to deliver him something or some other staff from the building. Quickly, he unlocked the door having learnt in the past year how to do so effectively and the person at the door certainly wasn't the doorman.

"Scott?"

"Mitchie! Thanks for the invite! I brought the Cava." Scott leaned forward and gave him a hug, bottle held above them so it would get broken.

"Err you're welcome?" He murmured as the blonde pulled away and made his way into the apartment, throwing off his jacket as he went.

"Right, we'll be off then." Kevin emerged from the kitchen already dressed ready to leave.

A flustered looking Avi appeared behind him pulling on his own leather jacket and unlike Kevin and Kirstie, he was able to look Mitch in the eye. "Yeah Kirstie really isn't feeling too good."

"And I need to get back home to check no one has robbed my cello." Kevin stuttered and stepped out of the way so that Kirstie, looking like a deer in headlights, could get out of the kitchen.

"Okay...?"

"Oh dinner is on the table and the dessert is in the fridge - everything is gluten free so don't worry." Avi counted off on his hands everything he had to tell him before wrapping an arm around the still frazzled Kirstie and lead her towards the door.

"Byeeee!" Kevin giggled mischievously, giving Mitch a slap on the shoulder as he walked past.

"Those rats." Mitch spat once they had all left.

"What was that?" Scott called over from his place inspecting the dinner that must have been put on the table when Mitch was at the door.

"Them lot, they totally set us up."

"Yeah I sort of figured that when I got your invite, you hardly ever invite me anywhere now." Scott mumbled trying his best not to sound heartbroken. He had missed him and their little hangouts dearly so had jumped at the chance to come and see him even if he knew it wasn't him who invited him.

"Sorry about that." Mitch felt guilty about what happened, how they just fell apart without a discussion.

"No I get it, I wasn't as friendly anymore and you felt hurt." Scott shrugged, sat down to the table and began to open up the wine with the corkscrew someone had left there for him.

"Have you met someone or something? Is that why you've been distant?" Mitch asked hesitantly, strutting towards the table looking uncomfortable.

"I can't have this conversation while sober so let's just eat as I'm starving and Avi's cooking is to die for."

Mitch couldn't argue with that. He didn't want to get into deep feelings without and liquid courage, he would turn into an awkward babbling mess, and Avi's cooking was probably some of the best he's ever eaten, in fact Mitch was surprised that his years of working in the same restaurant hadn't gotten him anywhere.

The dinner started off on an awkward footing, neither of them knew what to say or do but soon they found themselves getting into the swing of things once more, be it because they were remembering how they use to act or the wine was doing its job.

"So Katherine, spill your secrets." Mitch called as he walked into the kitchen with their empty plates and began to look in the fridge to see whatever his friends had left him for dessert.

"There isn't much to spill, I'm still single... I just thought that maybe it would be better if we stopped all the flirting as it was confusing." Scott's voice managed to be heard loud and clear as he called out from the other room, Mitch presumed that came from a history of being on stage.

"Confusing how?"

The wine had finally made Scott reveal his nervousness at the whole situation and Mitch could clearly see it on his face as he returned with two dishes of some cake Kirstie probably baked.

"Well it was almost like I thought you liked me but then nothing came of it so it was just weird." Scott gulped as the cake was set in front of him and then immediately began to dig in, hoping that the food gave him an excuse not to talk as much.

"Why do you think I didn't like you?" Mitch stared him down, taking a spoonful of his own cakes and play around with it before finally putting it in his mouth while Scott squirmed under pressure. They were complete opposites to their usual selves when they had alcohol, Mitch's hidden insecurities that only close friends knew dominated his life were lifted and he became as confident as he wished he was while sober, and Scott's usual confidence was removed, leaving all his secret emotions to spill out.

"Because you never made a move." He murmured quietly and took finished off the wine in his glass.

Mitch could see Scott was uncomfortable but he knew him well enough to know if he didn't get it out of him just then he will never have another chance to do so. Scott would note how uncomfortable the conversation had been and lock the subject away so even a hefty amount of wine couldn't retrieve it. "Why? Did you want me to?"

"Maybe but it doesn't matter anymore, I get it."  
Mitch had to strain his ears to hear what Scott was saying so he made the intuitive decision to pour the remaining wine into his glass.

"Do you ever think maybe I was waiting for you?"

"Nah, you're Mitch Grassi! You wait for no one." Scott attempted to joke but his deliverance was not quite up to par to make it funny.

"Maybe I made an exception." Mitch rose one eyebrow and smirked at him hoping Scott would realise just what he was implying. Mitch never waited for any man until him.

Scott must have realised what Mitch was saying as he choked a little on the wine he was drinking yet somehow managed to stammer out a reply. "Did you?"

"Maybe." Mitch teased.

"Well this is going well!" Scott chuckled nervously and dug back into his cake to try and comfort himself.

"Maybe... I'll go get some more wine." Mitch giggled and bounced up from the table to go make a selection from his wine rack. As much as he was annoyed with his friends for setting them up like this, he was glad they had. Even if the night didn't take the turn he was hoping for he knew that from it they were going to be close friends again and that was better than nothing.

"Do you think it will work?" Kirstie glanced over at her boyfriend on the couch next to her staring at the tv. It had been his idea to finally do something about the Scömìche situation, they had been planning it awhile but it was he who noticed the change in their behaviour recently. As much as she was happy that a plan was finally in motion, she felt guilty for springing it on the two of them and it took a lot of convincing from him and Kevin to get her to go through with it.

"I'd be surprised if it didn't. We can always go check in the morning." Avi murmured back, not taking his eyes off of the rerun of Downton Abbey they were watching and dropped his hand from the back of the couch to find her's on the seat next to him.


	28. The Book of Love

Kirstie quickly found that the best thing about living with her boyfriend was being able to wake up before him every single day. She'd loved it whenever they had had one of their many sleepovers together but getting to do it every single day was magical. A lot of people would find being watched while they slept creepy but Avi could never find her weird, she was too adorable to make him feel awkward. Instead of getting mad or uncomfortable like you would expect, he would usually pull her closer, giving her a sloppy good morning kiss and tasting that familiar sourness of their dry mouths together after a night of sleep. She woke him up every morning from her quiet admiration of him and he couldn't think of a better thing or a better person to be woken by.

It was the morning after their Scömìche master plan and Kirstie knew she should get up to go and check on Mitch upstairs before he returned to work but seeing Avi sleeping soundly in the bed beside her quickly convinced her to leave it a little longer. Reaching out to find her phone on the stand next to her, she sent Mitch a quick text asking him about the night before hoping that the situation between the two of them had improved and not gotten worse. She placed her phone back down and rolled over to face her sleeping companion, ready to start the morning ritual she loved so much. Thankfully, the New York weather had not deteriorated enough for him to forgo not wearing a shirt for bed and she thanked the Lord that she was able to have more skin to play with.

Reaching out, she tentatively let her fingertips fall against his outstretched arm that had been previously wrapped around her and began to gently stroke the smooth skin she found there. She drew patterns, alternating the pressure in her fingers between every swirl and every flick knowing that slowly she was lulling him awake. As her fingers met the edge of hair that begun on the side of his arm she felt him shift slightly, curling his arm closer to her touch, subconsciously enjoying her movements. Her hand moved up as she drew her fingers lightly across his collarbones, pausing only to admire the faded pink bruise that was still left there from a few days ago and she couldn't help but be a little proud that her mark was still there days later. Glancing up, she saw that his eyes were cracked open slightly, squinting down at her since the sun from the crack in the blinds was annoyingly falling straight across his face. She flashed a grin up at him before leaning down to gently pepper kisses across the shoulders she knew and loved while her hand found its way to the coarse hair on his chest, running her fingers in the directions that it fell. He took a deep intake of breath as her hand slowly moved down his chest to his abdomen, lazily tracing invisible circles there as she smirked into his shoulder, pleased that he was getting slightly aroused by her touch. Laying a kiss onto his neck, she quickly removed her hand from the smooth skin of his lower stomach and pushed her self up slightly to get a clear view of his sleepy expression.

"Never shave." Her voice was barely above a whisper as her fingers reached out to play with the stubble that was currently taking residence on his neck.

He moved his head slightly to get out of the sun, finally his eyes blinked open fully and he gave a sedated smile at the sight of her. "Never stop waking me up."

"You were snoring last night." Kirstie giggled, rolling more onto him so she was almost completely laid on his chest.

"Sorry." His morning voice vibrated through her body which instantly made her feel completely relaxed and complaisant.

She dropped her head to rest against his chest as she peacefully murmured a reply. "It didn't keep me up."

"Good." He replied sleepily, never wanting to leave the comfort of the bed. His hand came up to run through her familiar blonde hair as he laid there basking in the comfort of the moment.

"You have a meeting today?"

"Yeah." He groaned and threw his arm across his face in annoyance, it was first first real meeting with the record label so he knew he had to get up and try to look presentable.

She pushed herself up on his chest to smile down at the tired man, she loved morning Avi, he was rather adorable. "We should probably get up then, we need to go see Mitch and see what happened."

"Yeah," he grumbled into his arm, wishing desperately for one extra hour of sleep.

Kirstie yanked his arm away from his face and leant in to lay a few light kisses on his mouth in an attempt to ease him into waking. "Come on sleepyhead!"

Instead of replying, he just groaned once more and covered his face with both of his hands. As much as he hated to admit it, he wanted nothing more than Kirstie to get off of him so he could curl up into a ball and go back to sleep. He wasn't quite sure how she could be so cheery in the morning, she too was not a morning person but she made him look like the Grinch with the happiness she somehow managed to find on a morning.

"Do you want breakfast?" She sang playfully, getting up off his chest and pulled on her nearby robe which she left draped on a chair. She knew that breakfast would get him up, food appeared to be the only thing that had more power over him than herself on a morning, and she was more than happy to make it for him everyday (he cooked everything else so it wasn't like she was being reduced to the role of his servant).

"Mmm." He seemed to have perked up a little at the sound of food and his hands had moved away from his face but he still laid there with his eyes squeezed closed to stop the harsh light of the morning hurting them.

Kirstie goggled as she left the room at his laziness and began to go to work in the kitchen. There was no need to watch over him now that she had mentioned food to him, she knew from experience that he will get up by himself to come and see what she was cooking, sometimes on particularly playful mornings he would tease her just to see how long he could make her take to cook it all.

There wasn't much in the fridge as neither of them had decided to pluck up the courage to go and shop for groceries so he would have to forgo his usual breakfast meats in exchange for a few eggs. She heard him stumble into the kitchen behind her, clumsily walking into a countertop as he made his way towards the table and sat down with a huff.

She turned around and smiled as she took in the sorry sight of him hunched over her kitchen table. "So what's the plan for today?"

He coughed, clearing his throat so he could reply without sounding like he was possessed with a demon. "Err a meeting in a couple of hours and then Kevin and I are going to meet an old college friend for a bit. We may have dinner out, is that okay?"

"Duh of course! You don't need permission from me, I'm your girlfriend not your wrangler." She scoffed as she turned back to the eggs she was currently in the process of scrambling.

"I know but I just didn't want you to be disappointed that's all." His reply came weakly as she heard him shift his position at the table she presumed to finally sit upright.

"Aww aren't you sweet - I'll text Scott or someone to see if they want to eat. Who are you meeting anyway, have I met them before?" She asked while reaching for two nearby plates to scrape the eggs into. She didn't mind that he wanted to eat without her, after a year of dating she had gotten used to the fact that they can't do everything together.

"No you haven't, she's just moved back, her name is Diana." He grinned at her as he caught sight of the eggs she was bringing towards the table.

"Is she a musician too?" She tried not to sound jealous but she was sure she got away with it as Avi was too busy tucking into the eggs to notice. She hated how jealous she got whenever she heard him mention another girl, she knew she should just let it be, trusting him that he wouldn't let anything happen but she couldn't, she knew how easy it was for her to fall in love with him so she knew it could possible happen to another girl.

"Actress. I think she wants to take a stab a broadway again, she tried for a while after we graduated but she didn't do too well and moved to Chicago." He mumbled as he shivered the eggs into his mouth, almost nearly halfway through his plate while Kirstie had barely touched her's.

"Oh well I hope to meet her one day, she seems cool." Kirstie lied, she'd rather not have anything to do with her especially if it turned out that she was much pretty or much more intelligent than her.

"She can't wait to meet you either, she thinks you are amazing... who can blame her?" Avi smirked at her as he took a break from eating and his feet met her's under the table, drawing her into a lazy game of footsie.

"So you've been talking to her about me?" It felt reassuring to her to know he had been telling her about him, it meant she was well aware he was taken and also that Avi trusted her enough disclose information about their relationship to her.

"I just love showing off that by some stroke of luck I managed to convince you too go out with me." He grinned at her proudly.

"It wasn't that hard." She rolled her eyes at him, he always downplayed his skills and she was sure that deep down he was proud that he had gotten her to fall for him in a matter of days.

"If you say so." He muttered under his breath as he focused on finishing the breakfast she had made for him.

Her phone buzzed next to her on the table and she quickly checked it, giggling as she saw the message and raised her eyebrows. "Mitch has replied. He says 'Don't come up, busy'. I wonder what that could mean..."

"Well that gives us some extra time before I need to leave, what do you want to do?" He asked as he stood up from the table and brought his plate over near the sink.

"Is you an option?" She tease playfully, proud that she managed to make a witty remark

"Kirst, it's not even 9 yet." He moaned, too tired to be in the mood for some morning fun.

"Fine. I'll just go back to bed... all alone..." She sighed regrettably with all the melodrama her acting background had taught her. She stood up sadly and strolled into the bedroom, sighing as she went and grinned when she heard him following her into the bedroom. It had worked a treat like always.


	29. Build It Better

Diana was perfect. Perfect eyes, perfect hair, perfect voice, she was everything Kirstie could only dream of being. With Marilyn Monroe classic beauty and a smile that made even angels feel self conscious, Kirstie had no doubt that the pang of uncomfortableness that rocked her body was due to the women sitting across from her at the table. She was just so pretty, not a hair out of place and a perfectly proportioned body, so pretty that she was beginning to ruin Kirstie's dining experience.

She wanted to like Diana, she really did, Avi had sang her praises too much for Kirstie to take an immediate disliking but that was before she met her, before she discovered how comfortable she was around him. The light touches she kept on placing on her boyfriend's arm, the way her eyes lit up whenever he smiled, how she managed to let out her perfect giggle at every joke he made, even the really bad ones that were too horrendous to be adorable. Kirstie once thought she wasn't a jealous person but the women sitting across from her had managed to destroy that theory in only a few minutes.

If it was any other girl she probably would have been fine with it but there was something about the way Diana glanced at her across the table that made her uneasy, it made her distrust her without her even needing to speak a word. She wanted him for herself and Kirstie knew it.

Admittedly, she was the one to cause this little get together but now she deeply regretted inviting her over for dinner. Somehow she had made her feel threatened in her own apartment, she didn't like the way she was touching him, they way she looked at her like she was a piece of rotten meat to be tossed out, and to make matters worse she was just so goddamn beautiful. She trusted Avi, she knew he wouldn't cheat on her nor act upon any feelings if he had any - he was loyal to a fault, but coming from the performing career she knew those types of women, it only took them some revealing clothing and a lot of vodka to get even the most trustworthy of men into bed and from the look on her face, she was more than willing to try that on Avi.

It didn't help that she had been accosted at the stage door after her matinee performance by one of Avi's fans (oh how the times had changed) who had decided to take it upon themselves to declare to Kirstie the reasons why Avi had not yet proposed to her. According to the fan she was too ugly, too stupid, too untalented to make Avi want to marry her. It wasn't their exact words, in fact they had been a little more subtle when it came to their delivery but Kirstie knew what they were trying to say, that she wasn't good enough for him. Truthfully she had not been thinking about marriage before that point, they had only been together for a year and already so many problems had cropped up that so far they had managed to quell. So much had been going on in their lives for her to be thinking about marriage but the fan had struck a chord, maybe they were right, maybe they weren't right for each other, maybe instead he should have been with the beautiful natural blonde sitting across from her at the table.

She suffered through it for him though. He just looked so happy, so content that someone from his past other than Kevin actually cared about him still, she couldn't ruin the evening for him, she'd feel too guilty to look him in the eye. The only thing of hope that Kirstie could grasp onto for support was that Avi was not reciprocating any of Diana's advances instead choosing to hold her own hand the entire time like it was a constant reminder that they were a thing, that she shouldn't be worried. He knew what she was thinking, they'd been together too long for him to not know it and Kirstie was pleased for the support, he was restraining his enthusiasm for her and she was grateful for it yet that didn't mean he was going to stop altogether.

Diana left as soon as the dinner was over, deciding not to stay to finish the remaining wine which surprised Kirstie, she would have thought she would have wanted to stay around Avi as long as possible but apparently that wasn't the case. She was relieved that she was gone, her presence that night had just been a constant reminder of how imperfect she was, how she wasn't good enough for her immaculate boyfriend.

Avi returned into the dining room shaking his head with an adorable smirk on his face and she immediately thought the worst - what had they been up to while they were saying goodbye that had made him so amused? However the reason was not the one she was expecting, far from it in fact.

"She was trying to play footsie with me under the table but I kicked her so I think she got the message. I doubt she wanted to stay and watch us being all couple-ly in front of her. Sorry you had to see that, she was all over me." He chuckled sheepishly as he poured them both some more wine, careful to pour her a little more than normal to quell the queasy look that had been lingering on her face all evening.

Although hearing that she wasn't making up what she sensed between him and Diana and that Avi stopped her pursuit of him, the feeling of unease that she had been feeling ever since the encounter earlier that day had not gone away; the feeling that she wasn't valuable enough for him was still looming over her.

She took the wine from him without looking at him, choosing instead to stare at her sleeping dog in the corner of the room and murmur a reply quietly. "I thought it was just my imagination."

He could sense there was something wrong with her from her reply, she had been too distant all night for something not to be wrong but he suspected her mood would have gone the moment Diana had left his company which apparently it had not. Avi knew better than to confront her about it though, if she wanted to talk about it she would start up a conversation or at the very least hint to him that she wanted to have it out. Instead all he could do was carry on as normal.

"I don't know what's gotten into her, she used to be so cool and down to earth. Now she's just some spoilt brat that can't keep her hands to herself..." He stated, trying his hardest to calm her down by voicing his dislike to Diana's actions that evening. It was sad how much she had changed, she used to be so much fun and full of so much love and wonder, now money and ambition was all she seemed to care about. Before he had gotten famous from being Kirstie's boyfriend, she hadn't sent him a text in years but the moment it was announced he had been signed to a major label she suddenly can out of the woodwork. He should have realised it the instant he got her text but he supposed he always saw the good in people, even when there wasn't much good left to see.

"That's the business alright, it changes us all." Even she was shocked at how melancholy she sounded, she never realised how much the days events had affected her until just then. Kirstie knew she should never had let the fan's words get to her, she thought external forces on their relationship were things of the past but she guessed old habits died hard. Maybe there was some truth to it after all?

"But you're perfect." He leaned in to kiss her cheek before picking up the last of the plates to take into the kitchen.

She wasn't though, she knew it and the fan at the stage door that afternoon certainly knew it too. It was only a matter of time until he realised and left her.

The moment he returned to the room she wearily spoke up, "you should have followed her, you two would be great together." She wanted to say it before he had a chance to do it himself, at least that would soften the blow.

Grabbing the wine glass she was precariously holding too tight in her hand, he placed it on the nearby table and grasped her shoulders, guiding her to look at him. "What? Kirstie what are you talking about?"

"You should have seen you two tonight, you were meant to be, it was clear." She muttered bitterly. She knew it wasn't his fault, it was just hard not to take it out on him since he was the only one around.

Her tone took him aback but it was nothing he hadn't already experienced before. "I don't see that at all, and if we were, then it's a real shame I'm head over heels for the wrong person..."

For a moment she was believing him, allowing herself to be soothed by his words but that sense of security had been shattered by his choice of words. "A shame? See, meant to be." She threw her hands up into the air as she stormed off to their room, locking the door behind her.

"I was joking! I love you more than anything, Kirst - Kirstie come back!" Avi called after her, following her towards the room as quick as he could but he still ended up on the other side of the door, not being fast enough to catch up with her.

She felt the tears rising, coming into fruition as she sunk onto their bed and cradled herself. She hated what one stupid comment had done to her, she felt awful. A sly comment from some jealous person shouldn't have been affecting her that strongly anymore, she had thought she had gotten over it but there was something about that comment that rang true to her, like she had been wondering the very same thing subconsciously this whole time. They had been through a lot, they had moved in together, they have talked about having kids... getting married was the next natural step but it appeared he was not willing to take it just yet - if ever.

"Kirstin." She heard him bang on the door. "Kirstie open the door."

Sighing, she finally stood up from the bed, wiping her eyes with her already soaked fingers and moved to unlock the door. She really didn't want to see him just then, preferring instead to sulk in private but she knew if she kept the door closed long enough he would find some way to break it down and she wasn't willing to pay for a new one.

"Why me? Why me when you can have her. She is so beautiful and funny and smart and thin and -"

He pulled her close to try and stop her from her panicked rambling as he calmly tried to soothed her with words. "I'm going to stop you there. I'm not into her. I love you. Where's this coming from?"

"It's the truth and you know it." She muttered as she pushed him away, turning back towards the bed and away from him, she really wasn't in the mood for seeing his worried expression.

"There's no one on this earth - in this universe even - that I'd rather be with than you. What we have is true, it's what I've been dreaming of all my life and I'm sure as heck not going to throw away everything we've fought for for anyone who batters their eyelashes at me." His coolness was beginning to dwindle away and he began to fight desperately with his tone to attempt to keep it level and calm.

Sitting back down on the bed, she placed her head in her hands and replied while staring at the floor. "You deserve to be happy."

"And I am - with you!" Avi snapped at her, loosing his patience with her momentarily, they were supposed to be over these doubts. Realising he had just scolded her, he sank to his knees in front of her, took her hands in his and looked up at her with curious eyes. 

"What's happened Kirst, why are you saying this?" He asked softly.

It took at lot of courage from her to look at him, she knew just one look at his worried expression would appease her but she was't sure she wanted it, it would mean hiding from her problems and she knew from experience the damage that did. Wiping her eyes, she whispered her problems, spilling all her problems to him against her best judgement. "Someone at the stage door told me the reason you haven't proposed yet is because I'm not pretty or talented enough."

He didn't stop to think, he just replied as soon as she finished speaking, eager to solve all her problems. "You know that's not true at all and I thought we promised not to let the things fans say get to us - wait, you want me to propose to you?"

"That's not the point." Kirstie hastily replied, not wishing for him to dwell on that awkward aspect of the problem. She couldn't just ask a guy why he hasn't proposed yet, it was rude and weird and awkward, no one wanted to have that conversation.

But he had known her long enough to realised that was the issue, the fan was just someone who brought it to the surface. "Yes it is, you're scared that just because I haven't, I don't love you enough, or this isn't a serious thing for me but it is Kirst, it really is. It's just, gosh I can't believe we are having this conversation."

It wasn't that he wasn't thinking of those things, nor would he go as far as to say that his thoughts were private, it was just that he never expected to have to disclose those thoughts to her of all people. It should be a surprise, something she should have been secretly expecting for a long time but never asked about, it was just one of those things you didn't talk about but know he had to, he had to make it better.

"Sorry."

"Don't be." Avi took a deep deep, nervous breath before continuing. "Look, I want to marry you, I really do. I'm just not ready for that yet, at all. My life's finally getting back on track and I don't want to permanently bring someone along for the ride until I feel like everything's stable. That's all it is, not some random jealous fan's bullshit about me not loving you enough... What are you smiling at?"

"You want to marry me." She giggled, biting her lip to keep the smile from spreading wide across her face.

"You bet your ass I do - I want this, I want us to build a life together. I want you." Avi chuckled at the sudden change of expression upon her tear stained face.

"You're crazy..." She shook her head in disbelieve, unable to fathom how lucky she was for such a fantastic guy.

"At least I will be an incredible happy crazy man."

"And you really think I'm pretty?" Kirstie teased, albeit a part of her was still wondering the answer.

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." It was sincere. It made her heart swell.

"And you really think I'm talented?" She smirked, already predicting his answer.

"Yes, where's your Tony award when you need it..." He frantically looked around the room in search of the item despite knowing it was on the shelf in the living room which made Kirstie giggle once more, she did love it when he was being a dork.

"I love you." Kirstie stated and watched in wonder at the childlike grin that appeared on his face every time she said those words, like even after all this time he couldn't belie his luck she was saying them to him. It made a girl feel special, loved. 

His thumbs began to ran over her hands as he replied, needing to show how just how much he understood her and her insecurities. "I love you too. Now stop doubting yourself and join me on the couch and we can snuggle up with Toto, watch a shitty film that I'll pretend to hate but we both know I'll love and finish off the wine."


	30. Guiding Light

To say Avi was nervous would be an understatement. He was petrified. Totally Ron Weasley facing a pit full of spiders scared. If he remembered to think rationally, he would tell himself that telling Kirstie his news would not make her think any differently about him. She loved him and one little slip up wouldn't change that....But people never were rational in these kind of situations, especially concerning matters of the heart.

Nervously, he fumbled with the key to their now joint apartment (probably something they wouldn't be sharing soon after she hears his predicament and things take a turn for the worse), dropping the item a few times before he managed to securely fit the key into the lock and opened the door.

From the moment the door opened, Toto was quickly scurrying to greet him, overjoyed to see that his beloved friend had returned to him after hours of wondering where he had gone. Usually the sight of the small dog waddling over to him would have been a comfort but the presence of a leash around his collar and the small amount of mud that was matted into his paws threw him off... Kirstie was home.

Sure enough, within a few seconds behind Toto, Kirstie had made her way over to the door to greet him and without noticing the troubled expression on his face she leant up to kissed him.

"Hey!" She giggled in her usually upbeat tone, still unaware of the stormy mood of her boyfriend.

"What are you doing here?" He snapped anxiously, instantly regretting his words. She had shocked him, but that was no way to talk to the person he loved.

"It's Monday, I never have a show on a Monday...oh and nice to see you too!" Kirstie huffed, crossed her arms across her chest and backed away from him clearly seeing an argument coming.

"I didn't expect to see you." He stuttered out while trying to reach out to hold her, desperate for the situation to not head where he was expecting it to go.

She pulled away from him, ensuring that he got the message that she was feeling uncomfortable. She knew him too well to know that something was wrong, there was no way he could lie his way through this. "We have plans tonight remember? Monday night is always date night." She murmured.

He didn't want to imagine what must of been going on in her head, he knew how obvious he was when something was troubling him, so instead he resorted to sheepishly looking at the floor and forcing out an apology.

"What is wrong with you?" She warned. If it was serious, she wanted him to get it out in the open as soon as possible. Sometimes even actresses hated suspense.

"I have a lot on my mind."

"Well so do I but it's no excuse to be rude." She replied quietly, not wanting to raise her voice until she understood fully what was going on. If it was something that wasn't his fault she'd fell terrible for shouting at him.

"Sorry." He gulped, bringing his head up and gave her the eye contact she so desperately wanted.

"Stop saying that!" Kirstie grumbled at him, unbelievably annoyed at Avi's infamous numerous apologies, "what's on your mind that's so important?"

"David had a proposition for me and it's kinda been on my mind all day." He spoke the line just like he had rehearsed it over and over again in his head. 

He knew that the situation would be a problem from the moment he got called into his manager's office as that one meant one of two things - disappointing news or news too big and exciting to send to him through text.

"And?"

Gulping a little, he forced the words to come out. "He thinks I should move to LA."

Taking a moment to breath and let the news sink in, Kirstie thought about what happened after in Avi's encounter with his boss. What might he have said? What would she have guessed happened? Cautiously she stared at him and took in his scared demeanour before she began to speak once more. "And you said?"

"...Yes." His eyes clenched shut after he broke the news, expecting the fall out of her anger to hit him hard and painfully. There's nothing worse than having someone disappointed at you, he would happily take angry or mad over disappointed any day.

Determining that it was now okay for her to raise her voice, Kirstie shouted back at him, shocked at what she had heard. "WHAT?"

Avi immediately become frantic, all the anxiety he had about this moment came flooding out in a series of nervous sounds and words. "I panicked okay! You know what I'm like when someone asks me to do something -"

"Giving your phone to a thief is not the same as telling your boss you'll move across the shitting country!"

"Yeah I know." Avi sighed, already having this argument with himself in his mind. He was in these situations all too often. Always wanting to please had gotten him into some very tricky situations in the past 

"What about talking to me first, huh? Didn't you think of that?" Kirstie was hurt, offend too. Surely her and their life together would be the first thing he would think about in that situation, it would for her, which meant either he had thought about it and ignore it or he had forgotten about her altogether.

"I did afterwards. I knew straight away I was in the wrong." He looked at her pleadingly, desperate for her to understand how guilty he felt. 

"Way to state the obvious!" She spat back, turning away from him completely to avoid his desperate expressions. Kirstie knew she was overreacting, she knew her argument was irrational but she couldn't stop herself from feeling so annoyed at him. It must have been working up for some time now and that just happened to be the thing to break out all of her hidden emotions.

His hands dove into his pocket as he spoke to her assertively, still in a panic about what exactly was going on between them. "I'm going to call him straight away and tell him I'm staying right here."

"Too late now, the damage has been done. You might as well leave."

Her words caused him to stop his frantic shuffling in his pockets to find his phone. Avi did not plan for that. He planned for the mass amounts of apologising and making up that he needed to do after he broke the news, he planned for the expensive flowers he was going to give her to show her how sorry he was, but he certainly didn't plan that Kirstie would not even give him a chance. 

"What? Kirstie don't talk like that." He snapped slightly at her, pissed off that she was being so stubborn about this. It was his fault, he got that and knew he was in the wrong, but for her to not understand that it had all been a misunderstanding was annoying.

"Oh so now you care what I've got to say!" She threw her hands up as she crossed to the other side of her room, Toto apprehensively following her every mood. She wanted out of this situation, she wanted to rewind a few hours and forget about everything, but she couldn't, not while he was still there with her.

"I always do!" Avi raised his voice once more, irritated that she was accusing him of such blatant untruths. He knew she didn't mean what she was saying but nevertheless, it still hurt to hear her words.

"Leave." She growled at him, more angry at him that she had ever been before.

Without giving a second thought, Avi turned hastily towards the door, slamming it behind him as he went.


	31. I Don't Want To Go Home

The red eyes and puffy cheeks that adorned Kirstie's face reflected back at her through the mirror reminding her of just how pathetic that fight had been. Avi had been sorry, incredibly sorry, and Kirstie had still snapped at him for his silly mistake. It was mean of her, it was cruel but she couldn't help it. She had an awful day, one that very much needed to be improved upon by a date with her boyfriend but the thought of him being too preoccupied to remember their plans had made her outraged. He had had a rough day too, she should have been supportive but she wasn't in the mood and was far from it.

She glanced down at her flat stomach in the mirror, dreaming of the day it would one day become swollen through a pregnancy but that day was far off, further away than she had originally thought. Kirstie was so certain this time that she was, she was certain she had had morning sickness, she believed the store bought test, she swore she saw her body slowly beginning to change. 

But she had been mistaken.

Her sickness had just been food poisoning, the test an anomaly, and all it took was a trip to the doctors surgery earlier that day to confirm that all her hopes were not reality. It was like grief, she was upset about a child that never existed, a child she had begun to love only to find out it wasn't there, not yet anyway. She didn't understand what had made her loose her reasoning nature, the two of them were always safe, she would go as far to say overly safe (if that was even possible), as a pregnancy would mean she would be out of a job for a while and they weren't in the finical situation for that to be okay yet. The chances of an 'accident' happening was slim yet still still let herself dream away her logic. She wasn't sure how something that was never there could hurt so much but it did.

She would tell him one day, just not then, she wasn't ready but she knew she owed him one hell of an apology. 

Maybe she had already lost him.

-

"I figured you'd be here."

Avi groaned at the familiar voice and raised his head from the mug of coffee he was trying to force his tastebuds to accept and glared at the blonde woman sliding into the booth across from him. He had come to the retro diner over in Brooklyn for some time alone, not to be interrupted by the likes of her.

"What do you want?" He grumbled, not in the mood for any conversation let alone a conversation with her.

"To see how you are." His old friend replied curtly, clearly he wasn't in the mood to be bothered but she had to try, her conscience demanded her to.

"Cut the act Diana, you haven't cared for my feeling since you left New York...how on earth did you know something was wrong?" Avi sighed, leaning back against the booth in a dejected manner.

"It's a small island...well small ex-Juilliard group chat on Facebook." Diana jested softly while removing her coat, dropping it onto the seat next to her. "Plus you always come here when you're feeling down, we all do. Annie's is comfort for all of us."

"Please just leave." Avi ordered, desperate to be left alone to wallow in his own self pity. He was disgusted with himself, disgusted at his mistake, disgusted at how he handled the situation, disgusted at the whiskey he had consumed as a result. He was that annoyed with himself he was drinking coffee to force the alcohol out of his system and he never ever drank coffee.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong, you are never this good at arguing back." She gulped nervously, waiting for his hostile response. It had to be done, she needed to repair her relationship with him for her own sake.

"So you can have some gossip to spread around the city? Not a chance in hell." Avi face scrunched up in annoyance as he snapped back at her. He had trusted her, welcomed her back to the city with open arms and all she had done was use it against him.

Her reply was quiet and gentle. "Don't be like that, I care."

Her response made Avi scoff in disbelieve at what he was hearing and raised his hand in frustration while he continued his accusations. "Yeah, now that I actually have two cents to my name. Now tell me now, are you here to try and get me into bed with you for me or for publicity because I really can't -"

"- you've been drinking haven't you." Diana stared at him accusingly, Avi and heavy drinking had always been a disastrous combination but she doubted he had sunk too low that night just from his appearance. Avi was seeming a little rough, which was particular apparent in his choice of words, but far from being the drunken mess she had seen him as only a few times before.

"Only a little but I can see sense, I always have been able to I've just been too nice to say it." He shook his head as he spoke before picking up his coffee and attempted to drink it despite his mouth's protests.

Diana knew he was right, he was allowed to be angry at her, she had been an awful friend but she knew she had to stay strong and not let his words affect her, the least he needed at that moment was more misery. "You know you are wrong about me, I really care about you."

However, Diana's calm tone was lost on Avi and he slammed down the finished mug of coffee onto the table with a bang and practically growled at her. "Oh fuck off back to Chicago, Diana."

Sighing, Diana continued. "I've changed Avi, I'm not going to deny that. I hate myself for it. I push people away, I'm miserable. Nothing is going right in the world anymore. You know what the best role I had down in Chicago was...an understudy. No one from the old gang still talks to me - well I mean I'm still in contact but I don't think anyone cares about being my friend. And then there's you, you're always so nice and you're so successful and-and your girlfriend's perfect. So I guess that's why I came on to you so strongly, I wanted what you had...I wanted you."

"Even if all those problems are real then it's not an excuse to act that way, especially in front of my girlfriend." He countered like it was a matter of fact. 

"No, I know. I'm sorry." She looked at her hands guilty as she spoke, uncomfortable that her insecurities were being commented on.

"Thank you." Avi's words were quick and soft, not wishing to appear to the woman that he was beginning to forgive her.

"But you need to stop this, the angst, the restraint. I know you too well Avi, you're scared of your own potential and that's making you like this - too argumentative for your own good." Diana's eyes rose to meet his, hoping that somehow she could get through to him. "You've got a great thing with Kirstie but your going to end up loosing her if you keep on acting like this Avi. You need to sit back and let fate do its job, stop fighting. Don't end up like me."

"I don't want to talk about it." He groaned, throwing his head against the back of the booth.

"I can tell. But you need to talk to someone so go home and see Kirstie." She commanded, leaning forward slightly to emphasise her point.

"It's... not that easy." Avi admitted remorsefully, he couldn't just walk into his apartment without experiencing some sort of assault from his offended girlfriend.

"Ah, I see...well you need to come up with something big to get back onto her good side." Her eyes widened for dramatic effect as she felt herself beginning to fall into her usual routine with him, at ease and relaxed. She could sense that something between them had changed and the air between them was much, much easier to breath in.

Pausing for a moment to take in her words, Avi took a second to think before standing up suddenly and pulled on his coat. He scurried towards the door of the diner, throwing on his scarf while typing a quick text to Kevin as he left behind an old friend without even wishing her goodbye.


	32. Headlights

Some people are not destined to stay with the love of their life. It's logic, a fact. It's impossible for that kind of happiness to befall everyone; life is cruel. But as least they got an epic love story in its place, one that rivalled the likes of Tristan and Isolde, one that they could tell their children all about one day, something that could easily be mistaken as only a fictional story. 

Avi was uncertain he would get even that. 

All they did was fight and make up, she'd be angry, he'd sing and they were fine again. That was all they were, that was all they probably would be. Their romance was not epic, not a fairytale. Their love story was just a sheet of musical notes that would eventual end, they survived on romantic ideas only, they were a mess...Just two separate disasters that loved each other.

-

_"I'm sorry."_

_"Me too."_

-

When he left the diner that night he did not expect he would end up giving up on them. He thought that he could just sing his way out of it like he'd done many times before, he thought everything would be fine for good, he thought they'd be happy. However, he soon found out that thinking things does not make them reality.

It was Kevin that started it. Avi had text him asking to borrow his guitar but all he got back in reply was 'not again'. It made him think how many times he had asked him that, how many times he had resorted to what made her fall in love with him. It was an easy way out, a way to mask the mountain of problems they had, it never did resolve anything.

-

_"We can't do this anymore."_

_"I know."_

-

She understood. She agreed with him. Well, at least he thought she did. 

They were just not meant to be, not then anyway. Maybe they were right for each other, maybe she was 'the one', but they certainly weren't supposed to be together at that time of their lives. 

They just weren't healthy for each other.

-

_"I need to sort my life out."_

_"Me too."_

_"It's not fair for either of us to stay in this relationship while we are unstable."_

_"No."_

-

He left.

He left her crying in her apartment and it broke his heart.

It had to be done. Every time they thought things would get better they didn't. It wasn't fair.

-

_"Please don't do this."_

_"I have to."_

_"How do you know what I want!"_

_"That's the thing...I have no clue."_

-

Esther got married. Apparently Scott had moved into Mitch's apartment. Diana never made it in New York. Life went on, and so did his.

The record company he was signed to welcomed him to LA with open arms. It wasn't what he wanted but it was where he needed to be. A year or so of working on his music and his publicity gave him a stable career, one in which he could live anywhere and still make music, one where he had already created enough support that his label gave him a lot of slack. 

As soon as he could he moved back. He hated LA, it was too hot, it was too health conscious, but at least he was near to his parents. It felt nice to be able to afford an apartment west of the city without having to share with his sister. The real estate agent suggested a place on the east side but he declined, it reminded him too much of her - of them. 

His record sold, he became a thing, he got nominated for awards which he never won. He was a somebody now just like her.

_Kirstie_. 

He never heard from her in the two years he was out of New York.

-

_"Avi."_

_-_

She still lived in that apartment, Esther had told him. Her fame had died down a little, she was no longer in the spotlight but her reputation had never changed, she was still adored and much sought after. She had gotten what she had wanted. Somehow he doubted that would have happened without him leaving.

He heard she was in Les Mis now playing the role every young theatre girl dreamed of getting. Avi was so proud of her, it was a role everyone wanted and apparently she was amazing at it. One night he had even bought tickets for the show because he needed to see her, to see for himself that he hadn't broken her for forever. 

She wasn't just amazing - he thought she was phenomenal.

-

_"It's because I love you that I'm doing this."_

-

Somedays all he wanted to do was see her. New York had that effect on him. It was their city, all it did was remind him of her. The amount of times he had tried to find her on the subway after a show but he never did. Her routine must have changed, maybe she stopped getting the train, maybe she got it earlier, he would never know.

He tried to find her though. He needed to apologise, he needed that closure and he was certain she would too, he just needed to talk to her again. He didn't have her number anymore, he didn't want to harass her in her apartment, so instead he decided to sing. 

It was something he had wanted to do again for a long time. There were no critics underground. There were no elite businessmen would could make or break you depending on one song. It made him feel free so he decided to do it every night while he wasn't famous enough to be noticed much.

Everyday he played. Everyday he tried to find her.

-

_"Avi, please."_

_"I need to do this."_

_"I know, I get it... just not like this."_

_-_

Stepping from the platform onto the train one night, Kirstie yawned, desperate to get home to relax. She had had two performances that day and there seemed to be a bug or something going round the cast so practically everyone had been off ill, it had been rough. Once she would love this time, needing the journey to make her feel better but not anymore. Train journeys were no longer an exciting part of her night, they just reminded her of him, of what they once were but New York was too confusing of a city to not use them. 

She followed his career intently, watching as his album climbed the charts, listening to every new song, watching every new interview. She was pleased for him, he had finally gotten what he deserved. 

At first she was angry at him for leaving her, even though she understood and knew it needed to be done she hated him for it. But time heals all wounds including the one left from her relationship. Splitting up from him when they did turned out to be the best thing for them both but that didn't mean she had stopped loving him. She would always love him, but she was sure she wasn't in love with him anymore. Nevertheless, he was it for her, she was certain. Her own little love story. 

She had been on one date since he had left but it didn't work out, he just wasn't Avi.

-

_Summer time, midnight getaway, I was falling for every word you'd say._

Her eyes calmly closed as soon as she heard it almost as if she had been expecting it. She knew it was him, she would recognise that voice anywhere. What was he doing there? Why wasn't he in LA?

_I'd follow the moon between the pines, every mile you were on my mind._

There was no hope in him that night, he had tried for months now every night to find her, trying different times or different lines but he had any luck. 

_Oh, we were younger. That was way back before you were mine._

He looked good. Healthier and happier, more content with life than she had ever seen him before. Seeing him made her heart race once more... she was still in love with him, those feelings had never left.

_I remember those days when love kept us waiting all nigh-_

He stopped playing the moment he saw her and stared at her across the carriage. She was as beautiful as the day he first saw her. 

The thought of getting off the train came to the forefront of her mind. She thought he was out of her life for good but he here was. All she could do was stare back.

It felt like the beginning all over again. It felt like they were still together. It felt good, like it was meant to be.

Her stop came but she chose not to get off the train.


End file.
